Young men watch too much porn? *Adult*
sleepymeko
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I'm not trying to point the finger at anyone, but I've been noticing a trend... A lot of men my age (generation Y to be specific) watch WAY too much porn and have an unrealistic approach to sex. They think women WANT them to *** in their face and they think it's perfectly OK and arousing for them to gag women with their penises (forcing a woman's head down on his penis).
It is very annoying and weird when I deal with men who are trying to talk "dirty" to me and say these strange things that are quite off-putting. And I have been with an older men and I usually notice this around younger men. It usually turns me off to having sex with them.
Also, I noticed they expect women to be 'ready' for sex with absolutely no foreplay and effort. As a woman I need to be AROUSED. You need to explore my body and be gentle with me.
I actually saw a presentation by an older women who enjoys having sex with men in their twenties. She had a similar complaint that a lot of men in this age bracket expect sex to be like the porn they watch. I often tell these men they watch 'too much porn' if they think this type of degrading behavior is normal. Don't go putting stuff in my mouth or face without asking me first. It's disrespectful and I know they don't mean to be.
Has anyone else noticed this?
It is very annoying and weird when I deal with men who are trying to talk "dirty" to me and say these strange things that are quite off-putting. And I have been with an older men and I usually notice this around younger men. It usually turns me off to having sex with them.
Also, I noticed they expect women to be 'ready' for sex with absolutely no foreplay and effort. As a woman I need to be AROUSED. You need to explore my body and be gentle with me.
I actually saw a presentation by an older women who enjoys having sex with men in their twenties. She had a similar complaint that a lot of men in this age bracket expect sex to be like the porn they watch. I often tell these men they watch 'too much porn' if they think this type of degrading behavior is normal. Don't go putting stuff in my mouth or face without asking me first. It's disrespectful and I know they don't mean to be.
Has anyone else noticed this?
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I don't know if it's so much a porn issue (can you really take it that seriously?? I guess if they have little other experience) though, or just that the younger generation expect everything to just come easily. No pun intended
I do a lot of work with people in their 20's and so many expect things to just be handed to them. Whether it be a great paying job, nice home, higher end furniture, top of the line electronics. I could easily see that be the case with sex as well.
I was talking to a guy a few weeks ago who was complaining he couldn't find a job. I suggested McDonald's, Tim Horton's and WalMart. He told me they would only pay minimum wage ($10.25) and he was worth more then that. No you're not! You're 20 years old and have no experience anywhere...you are not worth more then that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I also wonder if some young women are doing that stuff, so they expect it from all? A few friends daughters have talked to me about sex and it blows me away with what they are doing. I had sex pretty early (15), but didn't really try much other stuff (can't think of a better term
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My last BF, who is 5 years older than I am, did have problems with porn vs reality.
It's not generational, it's individual.
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Maybe young women are tolerating bad lovers more now? Dunno. I know I didn't then, and wouldn't now.
And I don't think porn is the only source of sex misconceptions. Hollywood sex is pretty unrealistic too.
Second partner, identical situation. I think I'm pretty fun and slightly adventurous when it comes to sex, but he was just too out there for me. He was also a bully and tried to pressure me into things a lot. One time he actually tried to force me to do something I really did not want to do. But the very LAST time, he answered his phone in the middle of everything. I was so mad and embarrassed, I went and cried in the bathroom and left shortly after that. I called him every name under the sun, when I really wanted to put my foot in his stuff.
There's no hope for our generation.
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Also, none had any weird, unrealistic expectations about how it should go. If anything, except for one, I think I basically have more kink in me than the men I've been with.
Of course, it could also be that so many women just put up with bad sex that there's no way those men could know any better. Speaking to some women irl and reading online about many women's attitudes and experiences about sex, I suspect that that's more likely the case.
I really think one of the most important qualities that makes a good lover is the ability to give and take direction well. So if something isn't working for you, speak up. If he doesn't listen, then play time is over. Do that enough times and he'll figure out that he can't just get off without taking your pleasure into account. Never let a man think he's great at sex when he's not--when you're done with him he'll take his "skills" to another unsuspecting woman.
After discovering the porn star James Deen (also known as the feminists porn star), I think every woman needs to hand out his stuff to potential lovers. Not his fetish stuff mind you, unless... but the "how to please women" films he participates in. Watch and learn fella's! Watch and learn!
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Ok continue with the thread
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Looking back it was not good and my parents were so oblivious. A 12 year old should NOT be able to cyber with grown men after school. We did all sorts of weird stuff to experiment without and clear boundaries. I think that's why I was such a late bloomer, I was terrified of penises!
As an adult I think porn can be awesome and healthy, as a young person there is way too much access to weird stuff out there. Nothing wrong with a few nudie pics but full on porn? I don't see how it can be healthy.
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Luv'd my permed hair I just didnt take care of it.
LUVVV my natural hair!!! :iconbiggrin:
I agree.
I know people in relationships watch porn, but we can't forget that people in this current generation aren't getting into relationships until they get older and older. A couple generations ago, by the time you turn 18, you moved out, got a job, and very soon after got married. Currently you turn 18, go to college, probably move back in with your parents (How's YOUR economy doin'?), MAYBE get a job if you're lucky, and MAYBE move out. It's practically normal now for people in their early 20s to still be living with their parents because of this "everybody is supposed to go to college" thing.
What does that have to do with porn? People getting into relationships later and later, getting married later and later, so young men would obviously be watching a lot of porn, and not getting any relationship experience until later in life than those in earlier generations. I'm 18 and I've never had a boyfriend, so, y'know. -Shrug-
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I would say that my exes who were younger (also less experienced than most men in their 30s or 40s) have tended to be more into porn-style sex, but it's just a generalization, not the rule. As someone else said, porn has been much more available to them while they were coming of age than it was for Gen X and older guys. Although one of my Gen X exes admitted he became "addicted" to porn and that he had no desire to do certain things until he repeatedly watched it online. He said it's confusing-- he was no longer sure what he really wanted to do, and what watching porn made him think he wanted to. I relate to that (I was into reading "erotica" at one time).
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I've been with people who watched NO porn at all, to ones who watched it frequently and really there wasn't much difference in the experience. The good lovers paid attention to what I like, etc. The bad ones didn't care either way. It didn't seem to matter which ones watched none at all, to owning it.