boyfriend's dad bashing

geminikissgeminikiss Posts: 88Registered Users Curl Novice
ok i got my hair cut recently and i couldnt do squat with it besides straighten it or put it up and i do not like straightening at all. so it finally grew out some so my mom got some new curl gel bc her me and my sister has curly frizzy hair lol (my two other sisters have smooth straight and ones a twin to the curly sister lol tmi sorry) anyways i used the curly gel and it became super curly and wasnt frizzy and my curly sister said you look like a poodle so i was like whatever and the straight haired twin was like i wish my hair would do that and i was like haha so my boyfriend came over to pick me up so we can hang out at his house (he has curly hair and loves when i wear my hair natural) so he was ooing and aahing over my hair so we went to his house and his dad was like you need to do something with your hair (like 5 times) its all scraggly looking and i almost started crying bc everytime i wear my hair natural he says that stuff ugh wtf. he makes me not even want to wear my hair natural :(
3a, normal porosity, fine texture, normal elasticity
experimenting with:
co-wash: suave naturals
rinse-out: tresemme naturals moisturizing conditioner
other products: nothing yet

Comments

  • Hakim NuraldinHakim Nuraldin Posts: 1,467Registered Users
    With all due respect. Your boyfriend's dad is a big fat jerk. I'm sure he's oh-so-popular with the ladies. Don't let it get you down. WHy does he even care how your hair looks. Somehow, I picture him with a huge belly and greasy, stringy, thinning hair.
  • hookilauhookilau Posts: 269Registered Users
    I second that your boyfriend's dad is jerky, for sure.

    I've got a 13 (soon to be 14 yr old son) and a 20 (soon to be 21) yr old daughter. It's an abuse of power. For what it's worth, some folks think they can say anything to a young person because there aren't any consequences. Just cause you're grown doesn't mean you're an adult.

    Growing up, I recall being disrespected by multiple friend's parents (because of my ethnicity, not relevant but in case you were wondering) as old as 17 and 18.

    At first I was just stunned silent. Eventually, I found my voice and was able to reply with snappy come backs....then there's the quintessential eye roll, or combination neck and eye roll:toothy8:

    No really, I'm not advocating being rude. You can't meet disrespect with disrespect, however, your boyfriend should say something to the dad.

    Then there's also the possibility that he thought he was just being funny. If that's the case (less benign and easier to deal with) then a wise-crack right back at him should do the trick.:laughing9:
    Following CG
    fine, medium-low density :confused5:
    protein loving, porous, elasticity ?

    Co-wash: Tresemme Perfectly Undone
    LI/RO: GVP Conditioning Balm, Jane Carter Solutions Nutrient Replenishing Conditioner
    Stylers: KCCC, AG recoil, CurlKeeper, As I am curling pudding
    Protein treatments: Aphogee's Keratin 2 minute reconstructor, and Colorful neutral protein filler

    Loves: aloe, glycerin & polyquats even in neg dews
    :happy3:
  • FoxyCleopatraFoxyCleopatra Posts: 412Registered Users
    geminikiss wrote: »
    ok i got my hair cut recently and i couldnt do squat with it besides straighten it or put it up and i do not like straightening at all. so it finally grew out some so my mom got some new curl gel bc her me and my sister has curly frizzy hair lol (my two other sisters have smooth straight and ones a twin to the curly sister lol tmi sorry) anyways i used the curly gel and it became super curly and wasnt frizzy and my curly sister said you look like a poodle so i was like whatever and the straight haired twin was like i wish my hair would do that and i was like haha so my boyfriend came over to pick me up so we can hang out at his house (he has curly hair and loves when i wear my hair natural) so he was ooing and aahing over my hair so we went to his house and his dad was like you need to do something with your hair (like 5 times) its all scraggly looking and i almost started crying bc everytime i wear my hair natural he says that stuff ugh wtf. he makes me not even want to wear my hair natural :(

    His dad is a [email protected]$$ plain and simple. You aren't dating him, you are dating his son. Regardless to who you date though, your hair is your business and it is growing out of your head. You can do whatever you like to it. In this world you can't please everybody so don't even try. Be happy with who you are.
  • jenny curljenny curl Posts: 1,814Registered Users
    Hey geminikiss, next time he gives you a snark remark about your natural hair, just respond with "Hey, guess what? Your son LOVES it" and give him a BIG grin.... :D
    3b/c :: Fine :: Porous

    I:love5: My Hair
  • geminikissgeminikiss Posts: 88Registered Users Curl Novice
    thank you guys!! i just need to stand up to him about that because its messed up :( and santini i think next time i will say that hehehe
    3a, normal porosity, fine texture, normal elasticity
    experimenting with:
    co-wash: suave naturals
    rinse-out: tresemme naturals moisturizing conditioner
    other products: nothing yet

  • curlyhoneybcurlyhoneyb Posts: 267Registered Users
    I agree with all of you ladies.

    This is unacceptable, geminikiss. Your boyfriend's father is being disrespectful.

    I once dated a guy who allowed his family and friends to disrespect me. He never said anything to them about it.

    They would make some very offensive comments about my hair, my ethnicity, my skin color, etc. His parents called my hair "nappy" and "ugly" more than once. His mom hated me because I'm biracial.

    My advice? Talk to your boyfriend. Be cool about it. Tell him that his father's comments hurt your feelings and you want it to stop.

    If that is you in your avatar...you are beautiful. And from what I can see, your hair is gorgeous. Who cares what he says? Believe in yourself, girl. Your hair is unique. It is beautiful.

    Stand up for yourself. It doesn't involve rudeness, but sometimes you have to put people in check if they cross the line.

    Looking back, I wish I'd been more outspoken with my ex-boyfriend and his family. I was very shy and sensitive. I never stood up for myself back then. It ruined my self-esteem. Now I'm 26 years old. I'm slowly starting to recover from the way people treated me.

    If you don't fix the situation soon, it will get worse. I hope your boyfriend continues to love your natural curls. Hold your head up no matter what his father says. :thumbup:

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