What to say?

rese08rese08 Posts: 1Registered Users
I have curly hair and I love it! My friend
has slightly wavy hair and straightens it like crazy.
She says it looks like a "birds nest"when
she doesn't straighten it. This kind of
bothers me ,because I really like and accept my
natrual curls. And I feel like if she
would just use the right
products,get a good hairstyle/cut, and
give her wavy
hair a chance she would really like it.
She is 14 years old and I think she just
really wants to fit in.
I've told her that her hair is
very pretty and she doesn't need
to straighten it,but she insist
that it looks awful wavy.
Does anyone else have a friend like this?


  • MinisharpieMinisharpie Posts: 30Registered Users
    My best friend is 14 with wavy hair always straightens it says the SAME EXACT THING is always complaining about it and yeah it does bother me

    it makes me think if you think your hair is bad how do you think my 3b type hair is??

    But I try to ignore it because my sisters have curlier hair then mine which is BEAUTIFUL and people adore it ! So i try to stay true to myself and not "sell out" :) lol

    At the end of the day its her opinion and she does what she wants with her hair you cant try and change it let her ruin her hair while yours is in its most beautiful state!
    Hair Type: 3b c iii
    Co wash: V05 Moisture milks passion fruit smoothie
    Styling: Queen heelne gel no cones. Apply leave in first then some gel scrunch let air dry then SOTC. Comes out frizz free and pretty. Then add some coconut oil :]
  • zeldagoblinzeldagoblin Posts: 575Registered Users
    I think it depends on her reasons for hating it. I would ask her why she doesn't like her hair curly, whether it is because she feels it doesn't look healthy/fashionable/unmanageable, or she just doesn't like curly hair. If it is the latter, then she is stuck with straightening for ever, and no need really to say another thing about it. If she just feels she can't manage it and can't make it look nice, then you could advise her on how to care for it to get the best out of it.

    If she wants "good" curls, get her to come here! If she doesn't feel fashionable, name drop a few awesome curly celebs ;) Taylor Swift, Katie Melua, Sam from iCarly, Leona Lewis, etc etc :)
    Here are my curly pics, password is fuzz


    But then again, too few to mention...
  • wavycurly40+wavycurly40+ Posts: 2,017Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    It's sounds to me like you might be taking your friend's comments personally -- like she's making comments about her hair, but you're hearing criticism of all curly hair. That's quite possibly not her intention. Speaking from the wavy side of the house, I can tell you that many wavies think their hair looks a lot messier than a "true" curly's hair. Curls tend to be more uniform, or to look more like an intentional style, to many of us. We sometimes feel that our "in between" hair looks like it's just messy.

    If you don't personalize what she's saying, it's easier to let it go. You can tell her your opinion, or encourage her to try a wavy look with different styling methods. But you're not going to change her mind, and she'll only try it if she wants to.

    Wurly and proud!
    Modified CG since 2008.
  • thickcurlygurlythickcurlygurly Posts: 230Registered Users
    My own twin sister has the same problem she has very wavy hair that has extreme curl potential but she stretches it out when she straightens it and its really damaged she says its to poufy or big when its wavy.
    conditioner: GVP conditioning balm
    leave in co: GVP conditioning balm

    And my hair hates avg :happy3:

    Yes I consider myself obsessed with my hair. :happy7:
  • DarinaDarina Posts: 71Registered Users
    When I have these types of conversations with friends/family it usually goes like this:

    Relative/Friend: We can't go out today. It's raining, and my hair will curl.
    Me: I'm sure it won't look that bad.
    R/F: No, you don't understand! My hair is hideous if I don't straighten it! It's naturally frizzy/dry/ugly/etc.
    Me: Yeah my hair used to be a mess but after I changed my routine up a bit it's getting better. Have you tried taking care of curly hair without using straighteners? I know some ways you could try...
    R/F: No, my hair is too frizzy natural. You have good hair.

    Anyway, my point is, I think many people do not listen to unsolicited suggestions. They need to want to make the changes first. I would talk about CG if asked, but I don't think it's my place to just start telling people how they should style their hair, just as I think it's no one's business to tell me if I should wear my hair straight/wavy/whatever. Most girls know that they are frying their hair by regularly using straighteners/blow dryers, but they've decided that they can live with that. So to each his/her own I say :toothy4:
    2a/b, coarse, high density
    no idea on porosity
    protein & oil-sensitive
    giving CG another go as of July 2009
    (previously on modified CG)

    Current Experiment:
    Co-wash - Biolage Conditioning Balm, Suave Naturals Wild Cherry Blossom
    Rinse-out - Biolage Conditioning Balm, AOHR
    Leave-in - Biolage Conditioning Balm, JCS Nourish & Shine
    Style - Deva Arc Angell, KCCC
    DT - condish/avg/honey mix, Ojon RHT

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