Staying motivated

misskcmisskc Posts: 10Registered Users
Hey ladies

I just want to know how you stayed motivated during your transition

I'm almost in my 10th month, and I'm kind of frustrated. Sometimes I love my hair and the styles that I'm able to achieve, and other times I absolutely hate it and wonder why I'm even going natural in the first place...

I mean there are days when I just feel so ugly and like I can't do anything with my hair. At the same time, I refuse to go back to a relaxer, or even put in a weave (nothing against weaves, I just want to focus on my own hair right now) I feel like I'm battling with myself

I know it will be worth it in the end, but right now it's just difficult sometimes...

How were you all able to get through rough moments while transitioning?


  • ailemacailemac Posts: 32Registered Users

    You've been transitioning a couple of months longer than I have, but I have to say it has not been easy. I try to keep in mind why I chose to transition in the first place. I experienced and continue to experience breakage from my relaxer. My new growth looks so much healthier than my relaxed hair as it's shinier and has more elasticity. I also love the formation of my curls now and through the help of all the curlies on Naturally Curly, I'm learning how to treat my hair better.

    Don't get me wrong, it is not easy being patient during this process and I am planning on doing a mini chop next week. I am so tired of my relaxed hair, but I am not brave enough for the BC. I also enjoy looking at pictures of other successful transitioners.:thumbup: Hang in there!
    Last Relaxer : Nov. 2008
    BC: Sept. 5, 2009

    CG & Loving it!:love4:

  • mariag002mariag002 Posts: 3,557Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    A few days ago I decided to read my transitioning journal that is in my Fotki. After reading and laughing I was like OMG how horrible!

    A few things kept me motivated:
    • If I gave up then that meant that some time in the near future I would probably have to suck it up and start transitioning again. If I had not given up the FIRST time I tried to transition I'd be 9 years natural instead of 18 months.
    • I saved pictures of people, artists, possible hair twins that would help me see my goal.
    • I wrote a journal. This helped me remember why I hated my relaxed hair so much.
    • I opened up a Fotki (photobucket is great too) and took monthly pictures to mark my progress.
    I hope those help. Transitioning took forever (10 months) but once I did the BC time just FLEW.
    - Maria

    Big Chop: 9/23/07
    Relaxer free for almost 5 years!

  • retromariretromari Posts: 79Registered Users
    Deleted post. Sorry, posted multiple posts!
    Natural since May 2009
    Goal: Thick Hair. Healthy Hair. BIG Hair!

    The reason I begged my mom for a relaxer back in the 90's:
    PCJ No Lye Relaxer commericals !
  • retromariretromari Posts: 79Registered Users
    I transitioned for over a year. It was a long but worthwhile process!

    To keep myself motivated I:
    • Stalked fotki albums of other naturals. It was really encouraging to see other ladies hair journeys.
    • Watched entirely too many natural hair tutorials, product reviews, and hair journey videos on Youtube.
    • Followed/read natural hair blogs.
    • Joined Natural Hair groups/forums on Facebook and on the Web.
    • Took photos of my hair to track my growth.
    • Read the following books:
    • - Going Natural: How to fall in love with your natural hair by Mireille Liong-A-Kong
    • - Hair Story: Untangling the roots of black hair in America by Ayana Byrd and Lori Tharps
    • I also posted a sign on my bathroom mirror: "YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL"
    Natural since May 2009
    Goal: Thick Hair. Healthy Hair. BIG Hair!

    The reason I begged my mom for a relaxer back in the 90's:
    PCJ No Lye Relaxer commericals !
  • SunnloverSunnlover Posts: 5Registered Users
    You will be able to have a curly and 'relaxed' look after you completely transition. My SO thinks he's dating someone new whenever I go straight.

    I went natural in 1995 after being fed up with those extra long salon visits!
    Remind yourself of the stuck-with-a-wet-head, hoping your next moments.

    Most importantly you will end up back at this place if you give in. The relaxer is just so dull, boring..zzzzz and predictable. Curly hair gives you so much personality and varies from day to day. I just joined NC and it's funny because a lot of the methods I've been doing already through trial and error. Trying to go more CG.

    We must appreciate that our curls may not have consistency depending on weather, product, or hell your own emotions that day! BUT..

    It gives us much more character. My big dramatic curly fro gets a lot more looks than my straight valley look. Not to mention you can twist, curly rod, old school roller set, and eventually wet and go!

    Our hair is a conversation piece. yes, ART!

    YOU CAN DO IT! It's soooo worth it. The relaxer is so not your best friend.

    ? Do you flat iron to deal with the in between?

    3c w/serious fuzz in the back
    Aveda Confixor
    ISO CO
  • misskcmisskc Posts: 10Registered Users
    Thank you all for replying! I've just been really feeling bad lately but this has really helped.

    I think I'm going create a fotki page, it might to actually document everything and see how far i've come

    You are all right..I know i wanna go natural, so if I stop now I don't wanna have to go through this again.

    thanks for the feedback
  • Nichole23Nichole23 Posts: 57Registered Users
    I think the biggest thing that has been helpful for me is getting rid of the option to relax. Take it and throw it away, tell yourself its no longer an option and that when you're feeling frustrated... it means you have to find another solution.

    I would agree with the other ladies...
    • If I did relax, I know I would inevitably regret it and would be transitioning again a week later. Only I'd be highly pissed that I had to do it all over again. lol
    • I also look a youtubes & fotki's of ladies who have transitioned to serve as motivation for me.
    • I put my hair up in a bun. Out of sight, out of mind!
    • I day dream about how fabulous my natural hair will be!!!
    Good Luck!

    Natural | BC: Sept 4th, 2009 | Curl Type: 3c
    Fine | Low Porosity
  • Kinky RhonnieKinky Rhonnie Posts: 1,166Registered Users
    Motivation for me was:
    - stalking fotki hair albums of the ladies on
    - saving close to $2,500 per year that I was spending on bi-weekly salon visits (Still don't know how I afforded it!)
    - recouping five hours of my life every other Friday (2" of hair on the sides and 3" in the top does not justify a five hour visit)
    - gaining a head full of beautiful, thick, healthy hair
    Get up to $10 off your first order at Use discount code: CAR231.

    My Blog:

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