Something positive - I need a practice run.

GuardianBGuardianB Posts: 1,833Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
If you don't mind.

Writing my renewal vows. Sat on a plane last week and had time to jot some thoughts and rhymes down. Came up with 2. They both need a little work but which one do you like better so I can concentrate my efforts. I have 2 weeks (less a few days).

#1
I may have never known love’s power, until you listened to my song
I may have never thought so much possible, until you told me I was wrong
I may have never heard a cry so beautiful, until you gave us our two sons
I may have never truly grown up, until I knew you were the one
I may have never found such comfort, until you held me in your arms
I may have never lost anything more precious, until you stole my heart
I may have never seen such trust in me, until I looked into your eyes
I may have never felt such honesty, in which there need no disguise
I may have never believed in anything, so much as I know true
That I never have or will love someone, as much as I love you
What I’m trying to say is,
I may have never been so grateful, so honored, so desired
We were meant to be together, two friends, one soul inspired

#2
I have a promise, and it may not seem new
But I offer it again, from my heart onto you
I promise I will be there, I promise I will care
I promise I’ll be honest, I promise I will share
I promise I will be a husband, a father and a friend
I promise I will be “the wife” if the situation lends
I promise I will try to see even if I may lose sight
What it is that you may need, I never like to fight
I promise you forgiveness, respect and full support
I’m sorry but I can not promise a tropical resort
I promise you my humor, I promise you my hope
I promise you a shoulder, in times you need to cope
I’d promise you the world, if I had it here to give
But I can promise our two boys a life that yearn to live
I promise my heart to you and this is one I couldn’t break
Because you’re the one who keeps it beating, with every breath you take




(I'll make sure that Anonymous and The Police receive full credit for their quotes I used) :wink:
~Two friends, one soul inspired~ anonymous
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Comments

  • three rivers curlythree rivers curly Posts: 994Registered Users
    Voted for #1 because it made me cry. She's a lucky gal, that wife of yours.
    Better everyone think your a fool, than to open your mouth and prove them right.

    Perception is not reality.

    http://public.fotki.com/hmiklos
  • IwantcurlyhairIwantcurlyhair Posts: 338Registered Users
    Awww! I like #1 a lot!! Can you teach my husband how to write like that? :wink:
  • SpringcurlSpringcurl Posts: 8,002Registered Users
    I liked number two, but they're both beautiful and made me tear up.

    Your wife's a lucky woman.
    TWINKLES.gifTWINKLES.gifTWINKLES.gif

    Obamacare is not a blueprint for socialism. You're thinking of the New Testament. ~~ John Fugelsang



  • GuardianBGuardianB Posts: 1,833Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    because it made me cry

    That's part of the effect I'm hoping to have. I was also hoping for a laugh in there as well. #1 doesn't have that.

    It was funny when I told her that I had done some writing during the week I was gone. Not that I had expected her to have done any, especially barring the brunt of 2 sick kids and a week of rain, but she looked so disappointed when I said I started or finished 4 songs and 2 vows. I just had to figure out which one to use. "And you're not going to tell me are you? And you're going to make me cry aren't you?"

    I gave her the Mothers Day card which she loved and I offered to call Hallmark for her to help with her vows. She could use part of that card. I got a (playful) sneer and a smack on the chest out of the hug before a bigger hug. :wink:
    ~Two friends, one soul inspired~ anonymous
  • eccentric_kurlzeccentric_kurlz Posts: 4,144Registered Users
    Both were beautiful, but I really like #1.
    A wonderful mix of coils, curls, corkscrews, and kinks.

    http://s211.photobucket.com/albums/bb133/shyygirl_2007/
    PW: curlyhair

    I have a blog now. Follow meeeee! :)

    http://naturalurbanista.blogspot.com/

    "You see, when it comes to language competence, a true patriot must hit that sweet spot between "job-stealing immigrant" and "liberal elitist." ~Eilonwy

    Wanna have access to the top names in fashion and luxury at up to 70% off retail? Sure you do. http://tinyurl.com/3yxneol

    DC metro area
  • jeepcurlygurljeepcurlygurl Posts: 20,448Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Curl Virtuoso
    They are both very touching, but since I like to laugh and cry, I would pick #2.
    --I'm located in Western PA.   --I found NC in late 2004, CG since February 2005, joined the forums in May 2005, started going grey in late 2005.   --My hair is 3B with some 3A, currently at mid back length when dry,  texture-medium/fine, porosity-top is low, middle is medium, ends are porous, elasticity-normal.   --My long time favorite products are Suave & VO5 conditioners, LA Looks Sport Gel, coconut oil, honey, vinegar.   
    --My CG and grey hair progress -  
    http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/going-gray/179328-jeepys-grey-hair-progress.html   
    --My article at NaturallyCurly about going grey - https://www.naturallycurly.com/curlreading/seniors/how-i-went-completely-gray-and-loved-it
  • goldencurlygoldencurly Posts: 2,385Registered Users
    I voted for one because it focuses on your past and what you gotten out of it. #2 seems to focus on what you're offering her. I guess it depends on how you want to approach it.

    Both are very sweet.
    ________
    HEADSHOPS
  • YolyYoly Posts: 253Registered Users
    I voted for #2. They're both nice, but 2 made me tear up.
    No matter what other nations may say about the United States, immigration is still the sincerest form of flattery.---unknown
  • DayzieDayzie Posts: 233Registered Users
    Hard desicion but I picked 2. Both choked me up a bit, but if it was my husband reciting those things to me I'd be bawling my eyes out! Very big kudos to you GB!
    "You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing."

    "There is so much good in the worst of us and so much bad in the best of us, it hardly behooves any of us to talk about the rest of us."
  • kimmyckimmyc Posts: 551Registered Users
    Wow, can you do both? That said I picked #2 for the same reason as jeepcurlygurl. I like to laugh and cry. Laughing and humor are an essential part of DH and I's relationship and I'm going to venture to say that it's the same for you too. Make her do both. :cry: :lol:
    2b/3a, primarily use Jessicurl and DevaCurl products, Curls Hair Tea conditioner and various gels. I'm modified CG-ish since 5/04.
  • medussamedussa Posts: 12,993Registered Users
    I love both. I'd be so happy to hear either one. Beautiful work there, GB.
  • GuardianBGuardianB Posts: 1,833Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Thanks everyone. After an early run with #1, #2 made a comeback to take the lead. I guess it's back to the writing tablet and I'll see if I can't do some tweaks.

    kimmyc, I'm not sure that doing both would fly. But then again, that would be kinda fun. I was hoping to memorize it. Doing both I'm certain that I wouldn't be able to stand there and listen to hers and then hit 2 of my own after.
    ~Two friends, one soul inspired~ anonymous
  • ChakraChakra Posts: 172Registered Users
    They are both really beautiful. However, If I had to choose I'd pick 2.

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