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Sort of a spin off of the Tallulah Willis thread: Do you take into consideration...

iaraiara Posts: 1,199Registered Users
Do you take into consideration what your kids would look like if you plan to get pregnant by someone?

It can be superficial or practical (as in hereditary diseases etc.) consideration.
You cannot invite someone to your house in the Hamptons and when she arrives, not let her stay. Tacky. Very Tacky. ~ East Village hipster.

People in Ward Three disdain three things: cleavage, hunting and dumb people who are richer than they are. ~ David Brooks

Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it. ~Armaments 2:9-21
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  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Posts: 31,258Registered Users
    Um...I should have take it into consideration more than I did. I love my 2 older sons, but they are very much like their fathers (my ex husbands), personality wise. That's not always a good thing.
  • AmnerisAmneris Posts: 15,117Registered Users
    I have found that you can't usually plan or predict these things because genetics is a funny thing.
    Get used to me. Black, confident, cocky; my name, not yours; my religion, not yours; my goals, my own; get used to me. -Muhammad Ali


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  • YolyCYolyC Posts: 3,758Registered Users
    I didn't. Luckily, and maybe I'm biased my daughter is very pretty. Even with her father's features.


    I was thinking the same thing yesterday. Demi is very pretty and Bruce Willis isn't bad either, but dang they made some fugly ass kids. It's mean and not their fault, poor girls.
    Location: Chicago

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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  • YolyCYolyC Posts: 3,758Registered Users
    Amneris wrote: »
    I have found that you can't usually plan or predict these things because genetics is a funny thing.


    True. If someone didn't know us, they'd think my daughter belonged to my sister. They have the same exact attitude. NOT GOOD.
    Location: Chicago

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    "If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything."
    Malcolm X
  • iaraiara Posts: 1,199Registered Users
    I know someone who will not even date someone seriously if she thinks his immediate family is messed up in some way (like lazy, angry, criminal, do not value education). Her mom has a mental illness, I cannot understand how she can justify people dating her. LOL

    I remember reading on this site someone wanted to divorce her husband because he had a 6th finger and she did not want her kids to inherit it.
    You cannot invite someone to your house in the Hamptons and when she arrives, not let her stay. Tacky. Very Tacky. ~ East Village hipster.

    People in Ward Three disdain three things: cleavage, hunting and dumb people who are richer than they are. ~ David Brooks

    Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it. ~Armaments 2:9-21
  • medussamedussa Posts: 12,993Registered Users
    Amneris wrote: »
    I have found that you can't usually plan or predict these things because genetics is a funny thing.

    I agree.
  • AmandacurlsAmandacurls Posts: 6,252Registered Users
    Nope. Genetics is a crap shoot, your kids could either look exactly like one parent, a mix, or totally not like anyone. I just figure if the guy is good looking we will have pretty babies.....but I've seen pretty people have ugly babies....and vice versa!
  • Vagabond DavotchkaVagabond Davotchka Banned Posts: 156Banned Users
    iara wrote: »
    Do you take into consideration what your kids would look like if you plan to get pregnant by someone?

    It can be superficial or practical (as in hereditary diseases etc.) consideration.

    Not particularly interested in having kids by a white guy because they might look a little to ‘white.’
    (if you ask me to elaborate or explain, I probably won’t. Feel free to ask but I don’t have to give an answer. It’s self explanatory anyway.)

    I have a fondness for red hair but I can’t imagine having a redheaded child (literally). Will it be redhair with freckles? Red hair with medium brown skin or light brown skin? Will there be red in the skin tone? I do think redhair in general is pretty and unique, and black redheads are very unique. A lot of redhaired black people – the hair isn’t from anyone in their immediate family; it goes way back. So it can show up anywhere.

    Other than that, not really. I’m pretty sure my kids will have head full of hair at birth (and it won’t rub or fall out). They will big/full lips. They will have big round eyes. They will have various colors of brown skin. They will have various type of curly/nappy hair ranging from silky, spongy, woolly, 3c/4a/4b. They may be tall (especially if the father if above 5’10).

    I say this because that what my other children look like, that’s what I look like, and that’s pretty much par for the course for most black people.

    I do like big men like Heavy D or Sir Mix-a-lot but if you’re whole family (daddy, momma, sis and bros) is big or overweight – I might have a problem with that. Are they big because they all eat and don’t exercise? Or is predisposition to be big? I am not taken aback that the whole family is big but I’m thinking there might be a lot of hypertension, diabetes, joint problems and the sort. I would definitely wanna know (in particular those diseases and others) what runs in his family.

    I don’t have a problem with 6 fingered person or 6 fingered kids. We can decide to keep the finger or have it removed.

    I’ve never seen webbed toes I’m not sure about that. Doesn’t sound appealing and if he got em, I wonder if that’s hereditary.

    If a person has albinism, I don’t think I would be interested. I do not want a child with albinism. But albinism is a crap shoot and has little to do with immediate genetics. Most people with albinism have parents and grands with color/melanin. Same goes for vitiligo.

    And then ofcourse you know I want all the basics – healthy kids physically and intellectually, has everything it’s suppose to have and everything is where it’s suppose to be.

    btw - I don't think there is anything wrong with the looks of the Demi/Bruce children. Rumer is actually pretty and Tallulah ain't bad looking. I think she will grow into her looks.
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  • M2LRM2LR Posts: 8,630Registered Users
    Amneris wrote: »
    I have found that you can't usually plan or predict these things because genetics is a funny thing.

    This was going to be my response as well.

    One thing I do hope my kids get is my husband's height...not ALL of it, but I do hope my son is at least 6 feet.
    :rambo:
  • SpunkyCurlsSpunkyCurls Posts: 1,523Registered Users
    M2LR wrote: »
    Amneris wrote: »
    I have found that you can't usually plan or predict these things because genetics is a funny thing.

    This was going to be my response as well.

    One thing I do hope my kids get is my husband's height...not ALL of it, but I do hope my son is at least 6 feet.

    Yep and ditto about the height.
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  • EilonwyEilonwy Posts: 12,389Registered Users
    I know I posted about Bruce Willis's all-powerful chin genes...But no, I think it would be silly to choose a mate based on your children's potential appearance. You just can't predict that kind of thing. I've seen very particular ads requesting egg donors, and I always wonder how many of the resulting children are at least 5'5 (if female), with blue eyes, 2100+ SAT scores, and basic musical talent.
  • WileE-DeadWileE-Dead Banned Posts: 24,963Banned Users
    medussa wrote: »
    Amneris wrote: »
    I have found that you can't usually plan or predict these things because genetics is a funny thing.

    I agree.
    Yeppers...
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    Ever since the sports thread wars I have sensed a special connection between [edit] & Wile. Like the connection oil has to water. I almost can't speak of it. Wait....my eyes are misting. ~asq
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  • sarah42sarah42 Posts: 4,034Registered Users
    I wouldn't specifically be thinking about future children when I chose a mate, but the qualities I look for in a significant other (intelligent, tall, attractive) are good qualities that I would want for my kids. That's how my husband is, and luckily our boys turned out super cute and tall and brilliant. ;)
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  • SystemSystem Posts: 39,059 Administrator
    No. Looks don't matter squat. It's more important to find a mate with curly hair. :tongue3:
  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Posts: 31,258Registered Users
    I didn't think I specifically looked for good-looking-genes when choosing a mate, but if I think about it, I have to admit that I probably wouldn't have chosen a very short man, because 1) because I'm not attracted to short men and 2) I didn't want really short kids. I'm really short, so a "miniature family" would have been strange.
  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Posts: 8,660Registered Users
    What I have seen is that the 1st child usually looks more like the Dad & the 2nd more like the Mom. The 3rd is a crap shoot. I think it also applies to personalities.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Posts: 31,258Registered Users
    Lotsawaves wrote: »
    What I have seen is that the 1st child usually looks more like the Dad & the 2nd more like the Mom. The 3rd is a crap shoot. I think it also applies to personalities.


    Genetics doesn't work like that. Eggs and sperm has no clue what birth order they are.

    People can only get just-so-beautiful, just-so-tall, just-so-strong. You can mate perfect human specimens together for generations and they really won't get more and more and more good looking. There is something called "regression to mean" in genetics...meaning that everything wants to go back to average. I think that has happened in the Willis girls.

    /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.jcu.edu.au%2Fcgc%2FRegMean.html" class="Popup
  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Posts: 8,660Registered Users
    Lotsawaves wrote: »
    What I have seen is that the 1st child usually looks more like the Dad & the 2nd more like the Mom. The 3rd is a crap shoot. I think it also applies to personalities.


    Genetics doesn't work like that. Eggs and sperm has no clue what birth order they are.

    People can only get just-so-beautiful, just-so-tall, just-so-strong. You can mate perfect human specimens together for generations and they really won't get more and more and more good looking. There is something called "regression to mean" in genetics...meaning that everything wants to go back to average. I think that has happened in the Willis girls.

    /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.jcu.edu.au%2Fcgc%2FRegMean.html" class="Popup

    This is what I have "personally" seen. I can't explain it. I just know that I look more like my Mom, and I am the 2nd born. My oldest daughter's 1st born is blonde like her but has her Dad's heighth & his face. My youngest's 1st looks just like the Dad & her 2nd looks just like her. I have seen this in my friend's children & grandchildren & also patients who come into my office with their children. :dontknow:
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • nynaeve77nynaeve77 Posts: 7,135Registered Users
    I didn't really give it a lot of thought when I was dating because I tend to like quirky, nerdy boys (think Zach Braff or Adam Brody)...cute but not conventionally handsome. I ended up marrying a man who is very attractive, though (he's prettier than me...LOL). Our daughter ended up looking more like me, but she does have her daddy's eyes and she'll have his height, too. Lucky girl!
    "Maybe Lucy's right. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Browniest."--Linus, A Charlie Brown Christmas


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  • EilonwyEilonwy Posts: 12,389Registered Users
    Genetics doesn't work like that. Eggs and sperm has no clue what birth order they are.

    There's evidence that birth order can affect sexuality, but I guess that would have to do more with things like prenatal hormone exposure.
  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Posts: 31,258Registered Users
    Lotsawaves wrote: »
    Lotsawaves wrote: »
    What I have seen is that the 1st child usually looks more like the Dad & the 2nd more like the Mom. The 3rd is a crap shoot. I think it also applies to personalities.


    Genetics doesn't work like that. Eggs and sperm has no clue what birth order they are.

    People can only get just-so-beautiful, just-so-tall, just-so-strong. You can mate perfect human specimens together for generations and they really won't get more and more and more good looking. There is something called "regression to mean" in genetics...meaning that everything wants to go back to average. I think that has happened in the Willis girls.

    /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.jcu.edu.au%2Fcgc%2FRegMean.html" class="Popup

    This is what I have "personally" seen. I can't explain it. I just know that I look more like my Mom, and I am the 2nd born. My oldest daughter's 1st born is blonde like her but has her Dad's heighth & his face. My youngest's 1st looks just like the Dad & her 2nd looks just like her. I have seen this in my friend's children & grandchildren & also patients who come into my office with their children. :dontknow:



    And I have seen many examples of the opposite...my oldest brother looked just like my mom. My oldest son looks most like me. My sister's oldest looks most like her. I think you've just been seeing the examples that support what you want to believe. Anecdotal. I doubt there's any science to back that up.
  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Posts: 8,660Registered Users
    Lotsawaves wrote: »


    Genetics doesn't work like that. Eggs and sperm has no clue what birth order they are.

    People can only get just-so-beautiful, just-so-tall, just-so-strong. You can mate perfect human specimens together for generations and they really won't get more and more and more good looking. There is something called "regression to mean" in genetics...meaning that everything wants to go back to average. I think that has happened in the Willis girls.

    /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.jcu.edu.au%2Fcgc%2FRegMean.html" class="Popup

    This is what I have "personally" seen. I can't explain it. I just know that I look more like my Mom, and I am the 2nd born. My oldest daughter's 1st born is blonde like her but has her Dad's heighth & his face. My youngest's 1st looks just like the Dad & her 2nd looks just like her. I have seen this in my friend's children & grandchildren & also patients who come into my office with their children. :dontknow:



    And I have seen many examples of the opposite...my oldest brother looked just like my mom. My oldest son looks most like me. My sister's oldest looks most like her. I think you've just been seeing the examples that support what you want to believe. Anecdotal. I doubt there's any science to back that up.

    I'm not looking for it, because that's what I want to believe. I really don't care. This is just what I have personally seen. You've seen the opposite. Oh well.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • Myradella3Myradella3 Posts: 2,481Registered Users
    My older brother and my mother are identical except she's dark skinned and he's light. Their faces are the same. I'm next the exact opposite. Mom's coloring but dad's face. The third has dad's face and coloring. Interestingly, the ones that look alike have the same personality. As I said in another post, my dad's mom is 1/4 black, could have passed for white. Her husband and first child were dark, dark brown. Having seen such a mix in my family, it never occured to me to think about what a child might look like because my experience showed me that it was all unpredicatable.
  • JosephineJosephine Posts: 14,175Registered Users
    The main thing I think about is hair. My ex had 3b curls like mine and everyone would say that we'd have cute curly haired children (but my parents both have curly hair and my other 2 siblings have straight). Honestly I'd kind of be disappointed if they had straight hair.

    Like someone else had mentioned I would want to marry someone with sorta similar features to me so that my child wouldn't look completely different from me. I know it's shallow but I'd be kind of sad if no one would believe I'm the mother.
  • AmandacurlsAmandacurls Posts: 6,252Registered Users
    I'm the oldest and I'm built like my mom. I am exactly her height. My hands and feet look identical to hers. She's heavier than I am, but I have the same bone structure and am built like she was when she was younger. In the face, I look like my dad, I'm colored like him, I have his hair and all my facial features look like him, with the exception of having cheeks like my mom.

    My brother is tall like my dad, but unlike my dad he has very broad shoulders (more like my mom's side). In the face he looks like my mom, but has my dad's hair too.

    Genetics is just a crap shoot.
  • deezee02deezee02 Posts: 1,509Registered Users
    The thing with genetics is that it is not just your gene's and your SO gene's, it is the way they combine. How can you judge that just by looking at your SO?
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  • cmb4314cmb4314 Posts: 984Registered Users
    If I had to guess, I'd say my husband and I are going to have tall, blindingly pale, blue-eyed kids.

    Not that I planned it that way at all. Just the way it's going to end up.

    He's 6'4" and I'm 5'11". Both blue-eyed. Both very very white.

    I'm pretty sure that both the skin tone and the blue eyes are inevitable. But we do have a couple of extended relatives who are pretty darn short, so some short genes may pop up.

    My one fear is that my husband has a really large bone structure. He's built like a linebacker. I hope if we have daughters, that they don't inherit that bulky build. Looks fine on a guy, not so much on a girl.
  • cmb4314cmb4314 Posts: 984Registered Users
    Eilonwy wrote: »
    I've seen very particular ads requesting egg donors, and I always wonder how many of the resulting children are at least 5'5 (if female), with blue eyes, 2100+ SAT scores, and basic musical talent.

    My husband always jokes that we could make a mint selling my eggs

    I'm tall, blue eyed, natural 20/20 vision, naturally straight teeth, and ivy league educated.




    Now if only all that crap gave me some self esteem it would be awesome :lol:
  • medussamedussa Posts: 12,993Registered Users
    Myradella3 wrote: »
    My older brother and my mother are identical except she's dark skinned and he's light. Their faces are the same. I'm next the exact opposite. Mom's coloring but dad's face. The third has dad's face and coloring. Interestingly, the ones that look alike have the same personality. As I said in another post, my dad's mom is 1/4 black, could have passed for white. Her husband and first child were dark, dark brown. Having seen such a mix in my family, it never occured to me to think about what a child might look like because my experience showed me that it was all unpredicatable.

    The bolded is exactly what happened in my family. Our third was a baby switch. :lol: She's the one in the avatar. We have no idea who she looks like. She still has very little hair. But last night I realized that she has my husband's smile.
  • AmandacurlsAmandacurls Posts: 6,252Registered Users
    cmb4314 wrote: »
    Eilonwy wrote: »
    I've seen very particular ads requesting egg donors, and I always wonder how many of the resulting children are at least 5'5 (if female), with blue eyes, 2100+ SAT scores, and basic musical talent.

    My husband always jokes that we could make a mint selling my eggs

    I'm tall, blue eyed, natural 20/20 vision, naturally straight teeth, and ivy league educated.




    Now if only all that crap gave me some self esteem it would be awesome :lol:

    I don't know if I could ever bring myself to sell my eggs. I'd always wonder if I had a child somewhere out there. I don't think I could ever donate my eggs.
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