I'm so hurt... Really in shock. How could a professional adult say this?

SephirothsChild15SephirothsChild15 Registered Users Posts: 208
I'm in speech. (I believe people some places call it forensics) Either way, you are scored on aunciation, content, and quality of your peice and performance.

I got my score sheet back today. Besides taking out my per icings (I saw that one coming) They told me I had to "do something," with my hair. It made me look sloppy and unprofessional.

I can't believe that an educator would write sometring about that. It was a speech teacher from another school.

I'm in shock and I'm really hurt.
:love7: I'm starting to love my hair :love7:

WARNING: I come with spelling errors.

:blob5:Loving the IceQueen Method

:salute:The biggest fight that we will never win, is the one with out hair.

Comments

  • nutterbutterflynutterbutterfly Registered Users Posts: 137
    I'm in a rhetoric class (speeches, essays, yada yada), and after my first speech my teacher made about the same comment.

    However, as he was criticising to my face, he expounded to say that it was distracting that a) my hair was in my face, and b) I had to keep moving it out of my face.

    You have to admit, it makes sense. He made the same comments about a [fake] straightie friend of mine with side bangs. It probably wasn't a critique of your curls, maybe just the style it was in that day or something. It's true that big hair does not tuck as easily behind ears as straight and/or fine hair does. I would just clip back the front of your hair or put it back for your next class if your normal teachers agree with the new guy. I have to say, he could have been more sensitive.
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  • SephirothsChild15SephirothsChild15 Registered Users Posts: 208
    It wasn't IN my face... and the teacher had nothing to do with our school!

    It just looked "messy"... it was down....
    :love7: I'm starting to love my hair :love7:

    WARNING: I come with spelling errors.

    :blob5:Loving the IceQueen Method

    :salute:The biggest fight that we will never win, is the one with out hair.

  • hipchickhipchick Registered Users Posts: 350
    I think the teacher was way out of line and the comment was inappropriate and shameful. I bet your hair looked far better than the teacher's hair!
  • nynaeve77nynaeve77 Registered Users Posts: 7,135 Curl Novice
    I had a college speech professor say the same thing to me. She said my hair looked like "clown hair". Irony of ironies, she also had curly hair but hers was brushed out and hairsprayed so it didn't move...not cute. It pissed me off at the time, but later, I realized it was kind of hilarious and just pulled my hair back for the rest of the class.
    "Maybe Lucy's right. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Browniest."--Linus, A Charlie Brown Christmas


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  • StarmieStarmie Registered Users Posts: 7,169 Curl Virtuoso
    You poor thing, know how you feel. Many years ago I was doing my nurse training and we had to do a placement on a medical ward at a different hospital (I'm a psych nurse, we tend to be more relaxed about these things) anyway a nurse tutor came on the ward one morning during handover and when it was over started having a go at me. First I was wearing a wristwatch - I explained I took it off when dealing with patients, then I was wearing a cardigan - again I explained I took it off after handover, just wore it in the office as it was very cold in there, the windows didn't shut properly and there were a lot of them, it having once been a TB ward. It was also the middle of winter. She just looked at me then said could I do something about my hair, I said I have it tied back, she said well it's untidy, I said well I can't help having curly hair. She again just looked at me and I walked off, in tears. I didn't even know who this woman was, she didn't belong to our hospital and didn't bother to introduce herself, just started on me in front of all the staff. I was 19 and absolutely mortified. These days I'd have told her how unprofessional she was etc. but back then I didn't dare. It was horrible. This was over 25 yrs ago, that I remember it so vividly tells you how hurtful it was.
    Seriously, if you get the opportunity to speak to this person, you should tell them how irrelevant your hair is to the subject he/she was assessing you on and how demeaning you found it.
    Sorry this happened to you.
    3b in South Australia.
  • curlywurlygurlycurlywurlygurly Registered Users Posts: 1,180
    OMG!! these stories are horrible!

    I try to take pride in looking neat and tidy, i swear I take a lot more time and effort than a lot of straighties but I'm always afraid of comments like these.

    Starmie,that's awful, I'm scared now!!! I've got placement in a few months - I'm studying radiography, but luckily this semester i'm in a small private practise (i think) but i'm still worried someone will say something!

    What I dont get is, I don't see how having curly or wavy hair at all effects the way in which we do our jobs/tasks? I don't see where people come off attacking others like this! I'm sure this could be seen as discrimination.

    sephirothschild; I'd look into this and see whether you're assement was effect by the fact that your hair is curly or not. Maybe talk to friends etc in your class that also wore their hair down on the day see whether they had the same comments made. If not maybe you should take it further, I know I would.
    2 something Australian :toothy4:

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  • SephirothsChild15SephirothsChild15 Registered Users Posts: 208
    sephirothschild; I'd look into this and see whether you're assement was effect by the fact that your hair is curly or not. Maybe talk to friends etc in your class that also wore their hair down on the day see whether they had the same comments made. If not maybe you should take it further, I know I would.


    IT DID!!! It counted off. I wanted to cry...

    Its late at night here and I'm desperatly trying to figure out what to do to put my hair up.... I'm so confused when it comes to hair dos. I've always just worn it down. I don't know what to do...

    Any one got any hair ideas?
    :love7: I'm starting to love my hair :love7:

    WARNING: I come with spelling errors.

    :blob5:Loving the IceQueen Method

    :salute:The biggest fight that we will never win, is the one with out hair.

  • .Musical.Junkie..Musical.Junkie. Registered Users Posts: 191
    Depending on length, if its short you could pin in back with bobby pins, or if its long you could put it back into a messy bun or something like that....those might look a bit more professional (in a sense)

    I don't understand why people are like that though...i have a job interview on saturday and i've been thinking all week on how i should do my hair...its stressful!
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  • SephirothsChild15SephirothsChild15 Registered Users Posts: 208
    Update ---

    On the speech team a guy friend of mine cut his BEAUTIFUL 3b/3c curls today after all the heat with his hair. There's not much a guy can do with their chin-length curly hair.

    I on the other hand, have a girl friend *attempting* to do something with mind.
    :love7: I'm starting to love my hair :love7:

    WARNING: I come with spelling errors.

    :blob5:Loving the IceQueen Method

    :salute:The biggest fight that we will never win, is the one with out hair.

  • nynaeve77nynaeve77 Registered Users Posts: 7,135 Curl Novice
    I used to just pull it half-up so that nothing was hanging in my face. I don't know how long your hair is, but that might be an option for you. Headbands or combs might be good, too.

    I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. People can be morons.
    "Maybe Lucy's right. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Browniest."--Linus, A Charlie Brown Christmas


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  • j-jill. j-jill. Registered Users Posts: 147
    Wow, I can't believe someone would say that to you.
    If it were me, I would be heart-broken. I'm very sensitive when it comes to criticism.

    He probably wasn't saying this because you have curly hair. I don't know how thick your hair is, but maybe it was really poofy and out there, or maybe it was just really distracting to him?
    I don't really know, but.. i feel for ya. ):
    Hair Type: 2b/2c (:



  • StarmieStarmie Registered Users Posts: 7,169 Curl Virtuoso
    OMG!! these stories are horrible!

    I try to take pride in looking neat and tidy, i swear I take a lot more time and effort than a lot of straighties but I'm always afraid of comments like these.

    Starmie,that's awful, I'm scared now!!! I've got placement in a few months - I'm studying radiography, but luckily this semester i'm in a small private practise (i think) but i'm still worried someone will say something!

    What I dont get is, I don't see how having curly or wavy hair at all effects the way in which we do our jobs/tasks? I don't see where people come off attacking others like this! I'm sure this could be seen as discrimination.

    sephirothschild; I'd look into this and see whether you're assement was effect by the fact that your hair is curly or not. Maybe talk to friends etc in your class that also wore their hair down on the day see whether they had the same comments made. If not maybe you should take it further, I know I would.
    Ah, don't worry, it was a long time ago and it was the only negative comment I ever got in a professional sense. I like to think people are generally less likely to have the nerve to make comments like that these days. I can only hope the op's situation is unusual.
    3b in South Australia.
  • StarmieStarmie Registered Users Posts: 7,169 Curl Virtuoso
    Update ---

    On the speech team a guy friend of mine cut his BEAUTIFUL 3b/3c curls today after all the heat with his hair. There's not much a guy can do with their chin-length curly hair.

    I on the other hand, have a girl friend *attempting* to do something with mind.
    He actually cut his hair because of comments he got too? I find that quite disgusting, the two of you should get together and put in a complaint of some kind.
    3b in South Australia.
  • sarahthewarriorsarahthewarrior Registered Users Posts: 252
    When I did forensics, I always wore my hair completely up--like nutterbutterfly said, it was mostly to keep it out of my face so I could make gestures with my hands instead of using them to keep my hair out of my face. I think even most of the straighties wore their hair up/pulled back--it just looks more professional when you're giving a speech.

    I can't say anyone ever marked me down for my hair, though. I sure hope this incident wasn't strictly anti-curly.
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  • burgundy_locksburgundy_locks Registered Users Posts: 2,420 Curl Neophyte
    OP, the truth is that whether professional adult or not, they are still human, and as we all know, people can say really nasty things. the fact that he's a professional doesnt excuse him... even though we all would like to think that it does. Be proud of you hair and wear it with confidence! Sometimes you gotta learn to laugh it off. An ongoing joke with my bestie is that she's side show bob and im crusty the clown and vice versa. we dont expect everyone to understand but we also have no problem putting people in their place! take this as a learning experience and jst keep on keeping on!
    para los gustos se hicieron los colores

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  • RupertsWifeRupertsWife Registered Users Posts: 492
    Starmie wrote: »
    Update ---

    On the speech team a guy friend of mine cut his BEAUTIFUL 3b/3c curls today after all the heat with his hair. There's not much a guy can do with their chin-length curly hair.

    I on the other hand, have a girl friend *attempting* to do something with mind.
    He actually cut his hair because of comments he got too? I find that quite disgusting, the two of you should get together and put in a complaint of some kind.

    ITA. I feel sad for this guy that cut his hair over a class (if that is the only reason he did it). The teachers should be ashamed of themselves for criticizing something that God himself blessed us with. If someone had a lazy eye would they recommend they wear sunglasses so it be less distracting?!? Sounds like ignorance to me.
    I wish you luck with finding a hair style that you are comfortable with and will still please your teachers. IMHO though, it is more important to be comfortable when in front of an audience then feel like something you're not.

    3b/c mix; mixture of fine, med. and coarse texture with med-high porosity


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  • SephirothsChild15SephirothsChild15 Registered Users Posts: 208
    Thanks guys.. And yes, I'm at a competition at this very moment. We're in a bigger city now, so I'm not the only one of my kind. (yay for the handful of curly hispanics here) They are more leneant as long as don't have it in our faces.

    P.s.... i'm bored

    *Edit*
    Yes, my guy friend did cut his hair off for this silly compitition. Looks bad.....

    Eh -- it'll grow back.... eventually
    :love7: I'm starting to love my hair :love7:

    WARNING: I come with spelling errors.

    :blob5:Loving the IceQueen Method

    :salute:The biggest fight that we will never win, is the one with out hair.

  • onethousandcurlsonethousandcurls Registered Users Posts: 1,118
    At least, being a guy, it won't take as long for it to reach his target length.
    3b/c, CG 9/18/08
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