CurlTalk

what do you think makes a woman look old?

VerityVerity Posts: 616Registered Users
The "no long hair when you're over 40" thread got me thinking about this topic.

We seem to agree that long hair doesn't necessarily make someone look old, but what does? I think these things tend to make a woman over 40 look older than she is:

dark lip or nail color
heavy eyeliner, and wearing too much makeup in general
"mom" (high-waist) jeans
scarves, unless they're worn with a coat for warmth
chunky, colorful jewelry
hats
wire-rimmed glasses
haircolor that's too dark

Are there any other opinions out there?
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Comments

  • NetGNetG Posts: 8,116Registered Users
    Poor-fitting clothing. It may be high waisted, and it may not. But not all high waisted jeans are mom jeans. Pleats look bad on nearly much everyone - pleated and high waisted makes you look like you never lost the baby fat.

    Unflattering colors - makeup and hair. Going monochrome where the hair and skin colors match.
    Not adjusting makeup to changes in skin. My mom's skin tone is more even than it used to be, but her foundation didn't look good on it. Now moisturizer and loose powder look SO much better/younger.

    Out of date or unflattering styles. Clothing meant to bag out or fit tightly both tend to be aging.
    The pews never miss a sermon but that doesn't get them one step closer to Heaven.
    -Speckla

    But at least the pews never attend yoga!
  • nynaeve77nynaeve77 Posts: 7,135Registered Users
    I think that being stuck in a style rut makes you look old. Wearing the same hairstyle, makeup and clothes you wore in high school doesn't work.

    I also think that trying to look like your teenager also makes you look old. Even if she's in fantastic shape and otherwise young-looking, if a woman in her forties tries to dress like she's 15, she looks silly and old.
    "Maybe Lucy's right. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Browniest."--Linus, A Charlie Brown Christmas


    My fotki: /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fpublic.fotki.com%2Fnynaeve77%2F" class="Popup
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  • plinkplink Posts: 103Registered Users
    Bad posture

    Moving slow

    Not smiling and laughing
    I have finally realized I look my best when my hair tells me how it is going to fall, and I just make suggestions.

    3A BSL
  • MaudieMaudie Posts: 508Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    This may not necessarily fall under the category of appearance, but I think these things affect our appearance.

    Complaining
    A bad attitude
    A negative outlook
    Self centeredness
    Rehearsing aches and pains
    Criticism of others
    Dug in opinions
    Maudie


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  • jeepcurlygurljeepcurlygurl Posts: 19,250Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Ditto the attitude.
    Self loathing makes people look old.
    I pity people who constantly worry about what they look like, people who feel bad because they look their age instead of looking perpetually 20, people who have been convinced by the media that they will never be perfect, they will never be young again, they should just go live in a cave because they have wrinkles and grey hair.
    In contrast - people who enjoy who they are and where they've been, those are the ones who look and act 'young'.
    --I'm located in Western PA.
    --I found NC in late 2004, CG since February 2005, started going grey in late 2005.
    --My hair is 3B with some 3A, texture-medium/fine, porosity-normal except for the ends which are porous, elasticity-normal.
    --My long time favorite products are Suave & VO5 conditioners, LA Looks Sport Gel, oils, honey, vinegar.
    --My CG and grey hair progress -- http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/going-gray/179328-jeepys-grey-hair-progress.html
  • VerityVerity Posts: 616Registered Users
    they should just go live in a cave because they have wrinkles and grey hair.

    It's not just the media. I read several message boards, and many people who are under 30 do feel this way. It's hard not to internalize some of our society's loathing for those who are no longer young.
  • rudeechickrudeechick Posts: 6,726Registered Users
    I think unhealthy skin and hair age you prematurely. Healthy vitality is youthful. So smoking, damaged hair, too much Sun, lack ot exercise, etc....

    After that, I think matronly clothes are a bad, bad, thing.
    Curls,Coils,Waves & WhatKnot:geek:
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  • jeepcurlygurljeepcurlygurl Posts: 19,250Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Verity wrote: »
    they should just go live in a cave because they have wrinkles and grey hair.

    It's not just the media. I read several message boards, and many people who are under 30 do feel this way. It's hard not to internalize some of our society's loathing for those who are no longer young.

    And isn't that a sad thing? In some parts of the world, that isn't the case. People age without shame and are even looked up to in some cultures. Imagine that!

    I don't let it bother me tho. When I hit 50, my old worries about aging just vanished. I love my wild grey hair, I can certainly tolerate the wrinkles and age spots on my face and will continue to go out in the sun and wind. There are lots of lotions and potions for my winter-dried skin. I'll wear my hair long or short whether it's flattering or not - I'm all about pleasing me not the world. And I'll continue to buy my clothes in the juniors department because I like them.
    If all those things make me look 'old' then so be it. I've had a blast getting here!
    --I'm located in Western PA.
    --I found NC in late 2004, CG since February 2005, started going grey in late 2005.
    --My hair is 3B with some 3A, texture-medium/fine, porosity-normal except for the ends which are porous, elasticity-normal.
    --My long time favorite products are Suave & VO5 conditioners, LA Looks Sport Gel, oils, honey, vinegar.
    --My CG and grey hair progress -- http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/going-gray/179328-jeepys-grey-hair-progress.html
  • WurlyLoxWurlyLox Posts: 4,858Registered Users
    Most of this isn't necessarily age related - just things that can make anyone look unappealing and unattractive!
    2C/3A/3B - modified CG - fairly fine now, normal/low porosity/normal elasticity

    Current Main Rotation: MG217 medicated or Aim2Health 'poos for scalp, Elucence cond., Spiral Solutions Protein & Deeply Decadent Cond., CJCCCC reg or lite,CJ Pattern Pusha,, Giovanni LA Hold Hair Spritz + lots more, sporadically

    HG Method: Super Soaker + Smasters-ing, brief upside down diffusing w/360o diffuser then clips/clamps & air dry. Newly gray - stopped my henna glosses!

    www.fotki.com/auntnett
  • munchkinmunchkin Posts: 2,909Registered Users
    I have always thought too much makeup can make you look old. Then I got "old" and realized the problem is a lot of older women can't see. They have no idea if they have a little or a lot of makeup on. I remember my mother once had it caked around her hairline. I knew she had bad eyes and realized she couldn't see it. Well, I have her bad eyes. Half the time I can't tell if I am putting it on too thick or not.

    Guess what can really make you look old is not just accepting that you are the age you are; maybe this falls under attitude as mentioned before.
    3b/c
  • banjocurlbanjocurl Posts: 1,020Registered Users
    And isn't that a sad thing? In some parts of the world, that isn't the case. People age without shame and are even looked up to in some cultures. Imagine that!

    I don't let it bother me tho. When I hit 50, my old worries about aging just vanished. I love my wild grey hair, I can certainly tolerate the wrinkles and age spots on my face and will continue to go out in the sun and wind. There are lots of lotions and potions for my winter-dried skin. I'll wear my hair long or short whether it's flattering or not - I'm all about pleasing me not the world. And I'll continue to buy my clothes in the juniors department because I like them.
    If all those things make me look 'old' then so be it. I've had a blast getting here!
    [/quote]
    a friend of mine describes menopause as nature's way of saying "ok die now b--ch". i disagree.
    jeep you awesome girl you! i love the sun and outdoors, use burts bees carrot cream as my only beauty aid with unpetroleum jelly around the eyes. i had a fun conversation with my 93 yr old aunt. here is a pic of us. she is a grande dame. her beauty secrets:
    she gets foundation specially made for her skin tone
    no eye makeup, she says at her age it makes people look older or have dirty looking eyes
    clothes that fit and are classic

    she told me that if i lived in the city i would wear makeup and be more chic. that'll be the day :) jeep i wish u lived closer...
    banjo
    Susan suburban NY
    3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
    CG since 11/11/04
    /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fpublic.fotki.com%2Fbanjolady%2F" class="Popup
    PW: banjo
    HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fuser%2Flazycurls" class="Popup
  • SystemSystem Posts: 39,059 Administrator
    People who stress about getting older look older! Life is too short to worry about every little wrinkle and grey hair. Let your hair down and enjoy life!:dj:
  • winifredwinifred Posts: 295Registered Users
    Banjocurl: You and your aunt are beautiful!


    What makes a woman look old?

    Dark lipstick, especially dark matte, brown lipstick
    Brown blusher
    Too much eye makeup
    Too much foundation and the wrong color foundation
    An overly powdered face
    Hair that's too dark
    Hair that doesn't move
    Mom jeans (high waist, tapered, faded)
    Clothes meant for teens and under 25's (mutton dressed as lamb)
    Baggy, frumpy clothes--the "I give up" look
  • VerityVerity Posts: 616Registered Users
    I'll add glittery or frosty cosmetics. They just don't work with wrinkles. ;-)
  • jeepcurlygurljeepcurlygurl Posts: 19,250Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    banjocurl wrote:
    jeep i wish u lived closer...
    banjo

    Oh Banjo, we could get into some good trouble, I mean FUN, together!! 2 old ladies not acting their age!!
    : )
    --I'm located in Western PA.
    --I found NC in late 2004, CG since February 2005, started going grey in late 2005.
    --My hair is 3B with some 3A, texture-medium/fine, porosity-normal except for the ends which are porous, elasticity-normal.
    --My long time favorite products are Suave & VO5 conditioners, LA Looks Sport Gel, oils, honey, vinegar.
    --My CG and grey hair progress -- http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/going-gray/179328-jeepys-grey-hair-progress.html
  • WurlyLoxWurlyLox Posts: 4,858Registered Users
    munchkin wrote: »
    I have always thought too much makeup can make you look old. Then I got "old" and realized the problem is a lot of older women can't see. They have no idea if they have a little or a lot of makeup on. I remember my mother once had it caked around her hairline. I knew she had bad eyes and realized she couldn't see it. Well, I have her bad eyes. Half the time I can't tell if I am putting it on too thick or not.

    Guess what can really make you look old is not just accepting that you are the age you are; maybe this falls under attitude as mentioned before.

    That's so true! I finally realized my mother had that problem, and I got her a lighted 8X makeup mirror and she's much improved.

    Just since I hit 52 a few months ago, I've suddenly gotten more and more far-sighted (I was later than most because one eye started out very near-sighted) and the regular magnified side of my makeup mirror wasn't enough to see for plucking. I got a 8X mirror with suction cups to stick on there and was horrified at everything I could now see, LOL! Of course, no one else could see most of it without it, either. I don't use it for applying makeup - that's just too anal! - but I do do a final check with it to be sure I have everything applied and blended OK.
    2C/3A/3B - modified CG - fairly fine now, normal/low porosity/normal elasticity

    Current Main Rotation: MG217 medicated or Aim2Health 'poos for scalp, Elucence cond., Spiral Solutions Protein & Deeply Decadent Cond., CJCCCC reg or lite,CJ Pattern Pusha,, Giovanni LA Hold Hair Spritz + lots more, sporadically

    HG Method: Super Soaker + Smasters-ing, brief upside down diffusing w/360o diffuser then clips/clamps & air dry. Newly gray - stopped my henna glosses!

    www.fotki.com/auntnett
  • banjocurlbanjocurl Posts: 1,020Registered Users
    thanks winifred. my aunt is amazing, at 93 she does not break any of the rules below and while she does not look exactly young, she does not look like a grotesque caricature but a put together real person. i am sometimes guilty of the baggy frumpy look but it sure is comfortable!

    winifred wrote: »
    Banjocurl: You and your aunt are beautiful!


    What makes a woman look old?

    Dark lipstick, especially dark matte, brown lipstick
    Brown blusher
    Too much eye makeup
    Too much foundation and the wrong color foundation
    An overly powdered face
    Hair that's too dark
    Hair that doesn't move
    Mom jeans (high waist, tapered, faded)
    Clothes meant for teens and under 25's (mutton dressed as lamb)
    Baggy, frumpy clothes--the "I give up" look
    Susan suburban NY
    3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
    CG since 11/11/04
    /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fpublic.fotki.com%2Fbanjolady%2F" class="Popup
    PW: banjo
    HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fuser%2Flazycurls" class="Popup
  • SuburbanbushbabeSuburbanbushbabe Posts: 15,402Registered Users
    Maudie wrote: »
    This may not necessarily fall under the category of appearance, but I think these things affect our appearance.

    Complaining
    A bad attitude
    A negative outlook
    Self centeredness
    Rehearsing aches and pains
    Criticism of others
    Dug in opinions
    Good list

    Skin that's washed out not enough color
    Too darkly dyed hair
    Clothes that are too young--I'm talking decades here.
    Too prominent makeup (it's not blended well or is applied with a trowel)
    A badly fitting bra
    My blog - /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fsuburbanbushbabe.wordpress.com%2F" class="Popup
    My FOTKI - /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fwhatsnew.fotki.com%2Fsuburbanbushbabe%2F" class="Popup
    comic-p.jpg

    Playing with my hair is a hobby. Fluffy, fine natural 4a. Goal= Healthy, beautiful hair that retains its length.
    Hear that crash? It's me falling off the CG wagon.
  • WurlyLoxWurlyLox Posts: 4,858Registered Users
    Maudie wrote: »
    This may not necessarily fall under the category of appearance, but I think these things affect our appearance.

    Complaining
    A bad attitude
    A negative outlook
    Self centeredness
    Rehearsing aches and pains
    Criticism of others
    Dug in opinions
    Good list

    Skin that's washed out not enough color
    Too darkly dyed hair
    Clothes that are too young--I'm talking decades here.
    Too prominent makeup (it's not blended well or is applied with a trowel)
    A badly fitting bra

    Oh, yeah, a good bra can take years and pounds off, LOL!
    2C/3A/3B - modified CG - fairly fine now, normal/low porosity/normal elasticity

    Current Main Rotation: MG217 medicated or Aim2Health 'poos for scalp, Elucence cond., Spiral Solutions Protein & Deeply Decadent Cond., CJCCCC reg or lite,CJ Pattern Pusha,, Giovanni LA Hold Hair Spritz + lots more, sporadically

    HG Method: Super Soaker + Smasters-ing, brief upside down diffusing w/360o diffuser then clips/clamps & air dry. Newly gray - stopped my henna glosses!

    www.fotki.com/auntnett
  • ninja dogninja dog Posts: 23,780Registered Users
    The bra issue, absolutely.

    And elastic-waist skirts or trousers.

    And what about those shoes that are a cross between sneakers and old person lace-ups? I think they have a small gold letter near the laces. Those are awful.:sad3:

    I disagree about scarves.
  • susancnwsusancnw Posts: 1,366Registered Users
    Maudie wrote: »
    This may not necessarily fall under the category of appearance, but I think these things affect our appearance.

    Complaining
    A bad attitude
    A negative outlook
    Self centeredness
    Rehearsing aches and pains
    Criticism of others
    Dug in opinions

    Have you met my older sister? ;D Seriously, she has rheumatoid arthritis and is in pain, losing mobility, but her refusal all the years before to do certain things that are better for her and her refusal at this point to do 2 things her dr told her to: stop smoking and give up coffee....she claims those are about all she has left, and I'm trying to convince her that by giving those things up, she might get some stuff back....but I do think her attitude, etc are having an effect. Her job sucks, they do not appreciate her work at all, they've cut back on her hours slightly until sales are up again (she does collections...brings in the money for them), but 6 salesmen sit in the sales office downstairs 5 days a week at full pay and full time in case someone calls in...hey, fire a salesman and give her back hours and a raise...if it were not for her hard work, they'd have shut their doors already. But she really can't find a new job due to the RA so.....catch 22 situation.
    My son wears combat boots (and a parachute). So does my son-in-law.
    The older I get, the less patience I have with cleverness. Thomas Sowell.
    Resolve to perform what you ought. Perform without fail what you resolve. Benjamin Franklin.
    Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. Mark Twain.

    s-event.png

  • MarMar Posts: 3,003Registered Users
    Too much makeup
    outdated hair
    overly tan
    "what's so funny 'bout peace, love and understanding?"



    "If you judge people,you have no time to love them"
    -Mother Theresa
  • ringlets of fireringlets of fire Posts: 105Registered Users
    Capri pants
    Nun shoes
    Flat one color dyed hair
    Eyebrows drawn on
    Visible lip liner (not blended)

    I will also add "Quirky". I think people get to a certain age where they don't care what anyone else thinks. That can be a good thing... but, not always. I've seen it take shape in odd animal prints, overly bright floral patterns, ankle bracelets, and ear cuffs.
    Hair: tight waves to loose curls. Thick. Coarse. Dry. Natural redhead until bright white strands popped out. Color with FramColor now. Shampoo: alternate Phytojoba with Cowash: Suave coconut, Paul Brown or those that didn't work well as a conditioner. Conditioner: can't find one heavy enough. Product: Aveda Brilliant Humectant Pomade. DT: Coconut Oil
  • curlee4lifecurlee4life Posts: 219Registered Users
    Mar wrote: »
    Too much makeup
    outdated hair
    overly tan

    I hope this means curly hair is in :geek:

    event.png

    Germany Curly

    Last Relaxer(Texturizer): Aug. 2005
    BC: May 2006

  • MarMar Posts: 3,003Registered Users
    Mar wrote: »
    Too much makeup
    outdated hair
    overly tan

    I hope this means curly hair is in :geek:

    Curls are ALWAYS in style :)
    "what's so funny 'bout peace, love and understanding?"



    "If you judge people,you have no time to love them"
    -Mother Theresa
  • MaloryMalory Posts: 379Registered Users
    I think that many of these things are about looking bad, rather than looking old. Things like wearing the wrong size bra or badly fitting clothes (either too tight or too loose) will make anyone look bad. And the type of makeup you can wear depends on the colour and condition of your skin - not everyone wrinkles at the same pace, not all young people can take heavy liner (I already had dark circles under my eyes when I was a teenager.)

    I think what makes you appear old - in addition to the stuff about behaviour, being cranky, moving slowly, etc. - is continuing to wear styles that were around when you were younger. At the same time, always trying to wear the latest up-to-the-minute trends, when you clearly aren't a teenager, can also make you look old.

    I also think you need to distinguish between "old and falling apart" and "older and sophisticated".
  • UP LisaUP Lisa Posts: 98Registered Users
    Hair that is colored the wrong color for a woman's skin tone and bleach-blond hair.
    2b. Dark Golden Blond. Very fine texture. Medium thickness. Thrilled to find waves!!!
  • 2poodles2poodles Posts: 2,480Registered Users
    Bad teeth - especially yellowed/stained teeth are aging. Those Crest night time strips are so easy and so effective - they can instantly make someone appear younger, brighter and more lively.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]2Poodles :flower: Southeast PA
    fine, med porosity, normal elasticity
    Currently using the following 2 - 3 x/week:
    Living Proof Perfect Hair Day suphate-free Poo, cone-free CO and styling treatment, plus KCCC

  • jillipoojillipoo Posts: 3,795Registered Users
    Ditto the attitude.
    Self loathing makes people look old.
    I pity people who constantly worry about what they look like, people who feel bad because they look their age instead of looking perpetually 20, people who have been convinced by the media that they will never be perfect, they will never be young again, they should just go live in a cave because they have wrinkles and grey hair.
    In contrast - people who enjoy who they are and where they've been, those are the ones who look and act 'young'.

    I was going to post and then I read what you wrote and see no reason to say the exact same thing! I agree 200% with what you've said. People who fret about their age seem older almost instantly.

    Age is like "beauty" -- if you are conscious of creating or preserving it, it forces people to focus on it rather than you.
    3a and strictly CG since August 2007. Porous and on the fine side. No to magnesium sulfate and glycerin. Yes to protein! Favorites:
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  • xcptnlxcptnl Posts: 15,678Registered Users
    Capri pants
    Nun shoes
    Flat one color dyed hair
    Eyebrows drawn on
    Visible lip liner (not blended)

    I will also add "Quirky". I think people get to a certain age where they don't care what anyone else thinks. That can be a good thing... but, not always. I've seen it take shape in odd animal prints, overly bright floral patterns, ankle bracelets, and ear cuffs.

    Noooooooo!!!! Say it aint so!
    Central Massachusetts

    One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. ~George Carlin~

    In regards to Vagazzling: They just want to get into the goods without worrying about getting scratched up by fake crystals. ~spring1onu~
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