Believing in Santa?

CurlyCanadianCurlyCanadian Posts: 10,904Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Curl Connoisseur
When do most kids figure it out?

I just asked a friend to join a few of us for lunch and Christmas shopping and she said she was taking her kids (13 & 10) to see Santa today. I asked if they were going to do pics and she said "No, they just want to give Santa their letters".

I asked if she thought they were pretending to still believe and she said no, maybe the 13 year old, but the 10 year old still believes.

That seems a little old...is it just me?
I believe in manicures. I believe in overdressing. I believe in primping at leisure and wearing lipstick. I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.
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Comments

  • KurlyKaeKurlyKae Posts: 3,413Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    My kids are the same age as your friend's. The 13yo hasn't believed in 2-3 years, but now enjoys the fantasy of it all, so she wouldn't mind visiting Santa. The 10yo...this year is the first I've heard any doubts. She's currently on the: that's not the real Santa (at the mall) he's just a helper. Just last night, she told me (as we passed him) Santa is too busy to go the the mall, he has to be in the North Pole this time of year. She hasn't come out and admitted to anything else, so I'm sure not going to tell her.
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  • alacurlalacurl Posts: 1,199Registered Users Curl Novice
    I think 10 is a little old to still believe in a real flesh-and-blood S.C. However, you're never too old to believe in the spirit of Santa. That IS real. :)

    Maybe the 10-year-old does a good job of pretending. I pretended until I was 11 'cause I loved the idea of Santa! But I'm sure my family knew I was pretending.
    shoulder-length 3a/b, depending on weather and products (or lack of products!)
  • PoodleheadPoodlehead Posts: 6,959Registered Users
    I say let 'em believe as long as they want to believe. Where is the harm in it?
    Minneapolis, MN
  • legendslegends Posts: 3,073Registered Users
    I think that's too old. From what I've seen, when older kids still believe in Santa it's because the parents deliberately set out to make them believe (like writing "From Santa" on gifts and such), which I find kind of creepy. If parents are just going with the flow and not doing anything to encourage or discourage it then maybe it's not that big a deal.
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  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Posts: 9,770Registered Users Curl Virtuoso
    Mine caught on at about 7. They learned this from their school friends. We still did the Santa gifts & stockings. 13 is way too old in my opinion.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • redcelticcurlsredcelticcurls Posts: 17,502Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I figured it out in 2nd grade (the math and logic didn't fit), so 10 seems kind of old to me.
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  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Posts: 9,770Registered Users Curl Virtuoso
    I agree, 10 seems too old to me, as well. 13 really got to me, because I know there would be no way I would be writing letters to Santa at that age much less handing them to him.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • redcelticcurlsredcelticcurls Posts: 17,502Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    One of my neices figured it out (she's in first grade) but she told my sister that she was afraid that she wouldn't get as many presents if she didn't believe. I wonder if that plays a role in it.

    I also think it depends on parental expectations.
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  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Posts: 9,770Registered Users Curl Virtuoso
    I think it's hard to let go of Santa, the Easter bunny, etc with the kids, because it makes the holidays more fun. Fortunately, I now have grandchildren that still believe.

    Don't you think it's a little weird that the kids just accept that this is all make believe & don't get upset or accuse their parents of lying to them for years? I've never heard of a child who was traumatized over learning there really isn't a Santa Claus.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • CurlyCurliesCurlyCurlies Posts: 1,641Registered Users
    Hmm, I don't know, I think 13 is a little too old, but then again, I never had any expectation that Santa was real as a kid. That was probably b/c I had older siblings that I knew for a fact either helped wrapped the presents or were actively searching for the "hiding spot" :) . We never got any presents that said from "Santa" either, they always said from Mama or Auntie Suzy or whatever.
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  • SarahMarieSarahMarie Posts: 901Registered Users
    My best friend ruined it all for me when I was pretty young, I'm thinking kindergarten or before. She is actually a year younger than I am. We would be riding in the car and she would ask, "Do you still believe in Santa? I don't." Well, geez! The first time she mentioned that, I didn't believe anymore!

    I kept pretending to believe in Santa until the second grade, when my dad took me out to dinner and talked to me about it. I told him that I knew better, but was afraid I wouldn't get as much stuff.

    I actually found that it was more fun not believing in Santa and helping my parents set out presents for my sister, who is 5 years younger. The Easter Bunny brought her a hamster that year, and I got to pick it out! My sister and I are both adults now and neither of us live with our parents, but my mom still hangs up stockings for us and fills them with candy and such. My boyfriend's mom does the same thing for him and his sister.
  • kat180kat180 Posts: 6,280Registered Users Curl Novice
    Im 20 and still get stocking- however I know its from my parents not Santa lol! I stopped putting stuff out for Santa/writing letter a few years ago because couldn't be bothered anymore. Im sure at 13 they are still having fun pretending its still real-especially if they have younger brothers/sisters. I dont see anything creepy about it.
  • WileE-DeadWileE-Dead Banned Posts: 24,963Banned Users Curl Neophyte
    It's a magical time of year! :santa::rendeer:
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    Ever since the sports thread wars I have sensed a special connection between [edit] & Wile. Like the connection oil has to water. I almost can't speak of it. Wait....my eyes are misting. ~asq
    Let’s just stay together and tell the world to kiss our ass. ~P


  • Gemini13Gemini13 Posts: 5,000Registered Users
    I think I was 10 or 11 when I finally admitted to myself that Santa wasn't real. In honesty I did know the truth before then- but it was fun to believe! But I wouldn't have gone to see Santa at the mall at that age, I don't think I did that past age 5 or so.
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  • subbrocksubbrock Posts: 8,212Registered Users
    i never believed in santa. my parents never made a big deal about it (no letters to/from santa, no cookies and milk left out for him, no annual trips to go visit santa at the mall, etc) but on my presents some would be left by "santa." as soon as i was old enough to read, i noticed that santa and my dad had the same handwriting, so that was the final nail in the coffin.

    back in elementary school, one of my friends still believed in santa by the time we were in 6th grade. all the previous years, we would never tell her that he wasnt real but 6th grade is when we had an intervention and told her that there was no santa.
  • KurlyKaeKurlyKae Posts: 3,413Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I don't think there is an age that is "too old." Each child will figure it out, when he figures it out, or a friend tells him. (Some one in my CCD class told me! Of course, he had three older brothers, and was much more sophisticated than I was...) I asked mom, who said, "well, what do YOU think?" I decided to believe because I wanted to. Then gradually let go, and just enjoyed.
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  • FullOfCurlsFullOfCurls Posts: 47Registered Users
    I don't really think there is an age which is right or wrong to still believe in Santa. In fact, I think some make believe and imagination is great for children. I really think that it is more about the fantasy of the holiday then the actual believing in it.

    I know that I found out about "Santa" when I was 7ish because we were "holiday snoopers" and saw what we were getting from Santa in the parents closet. It never ruined the holiday for me, because it was the fantasy of the holiday that I enjoyed and how much my parents got involved with it.

    I see the same thing in my nephews now. One is 13 and the other is 8. Last year my older nephew told me that he knows about santa not being real. I asked him where he found out and his reply was that he wasn't a baby anymore and just knows things. Lol, I got a laugh out of that. He then whispered to me that he still wanted to act like he believed for his younger brother and his mom. He thought they would both be upset by the news. I laughed and said that was a good plan. It was really cute how he just went along with building up the excitement. On Christmas Eve I had him help with the stockings and all that. It was just as special.

    Lol, now that I think about it I never did tell my parents that I don't believe anymore. Maybe they still think I am a bit too old to be a believer but are to worried to tell me any different.
  • AdriaCroftAdriaCroft Posts: 264Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    lol, me and my daughter were talking about this just last week. Kaitlin is 12 and does not believe in santa anymore but we were walking through our shopping centre and she said can I go see Santa I laughed but said Ok but we had to go somewhere first. As it happened we bumped into the shopping centre's santa, Kaitlin just started giggling and said your ok mum its not the same anymore and that Santa looks creepy and funny to me now. I laughed and she said "I like christmas being about me you and dad, mum"

    I found that to be nice she may not believe in Santa but she does believe in family.
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  • alacurlalacurl Posts: 1,199Registered Users Curl Novice
    To clarify my earlier response: I don't think there's anything wrong with a 10-year-old still believing in Santa. I just don't think it's very realistic to think a kid that age would still believe. Maybe many, many years ago, but not these days.
    shoulder-length 3a/b, depending on weather and products (or lack of products!)
  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Posts: 31,259Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Well, I do think there is something wrong with believing too long. I told my almost-11 year old daughter recently that Santa is pretend, because I thought it was going on too long. She was relieved to have me confirm her suspicions for her. I think she was torn...she suspected and all logic told her not to believe, but she always thinks her parents know everything and if they believe, she felt guilty not believing. So, I relieved her of her burden.
  • Curly Girl FlaCurly Girl Fla Posts: 1,834Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    I think over 10 is pushing it, but each child is so different. My just 6yo believes, but she is constantly questioning the logistics in general-some specific inquiries over the weekend- we don't have a fire place, so how is this going to work; if we're not home, how does Santa know what house to go to; does he actually just see us, or can he hear us, too; does he hang with the tooth fairy? I honestly don't know if she'll believe come next year since she does examine everything closely, although she did ask if we can leave milk and cookies out this year...I never believed (grew up in a Jewish household), and I'm glad my children can experience the magic for awhile...
  • SleighSleigh Posts: 1,226Registered Users
    i was one of the kids that told other kids that santa wasn't real. on a regular basis.

    then the parents would yell at me...and i would tell them not to lie to their kids. that made for fun discussions.

    i still kind of have a hard time with kids believing in santa...because there are kids like me out there...i mean, do you really want someone like me making your child doubt your relationship?
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  • KaiaKaia Posts: 8,815Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Sleigh wrote: »
    i was one of the kids that told other kids that santa wasn't real. on a regular basis.

    then the parents would yell at me...and i would tell them not to lie to their kids. that made for fun discussions.

    i still kind of have a hard time with kids believing in santa...because there are kids like me out there...i mean, do you really want someone like me making your child doubt your relationship?

    Too cute!

    We're not sure what we're doing about Santa, because I do think it's kind of wrong to keep such an elaborate lie going to your children, even if it is with the best interests at heart. I have such fond x-mas memories when I believed though! My DH was very traumatized when he found out about Santa, so he doesn't want to do the Santa thing at all. I think we may go through the motions but tell them it's pretend. I don't know.
    *Poster formerly known as Bailey422*

    Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. ~ George Carlin
  • Aphro-DeeziacAphro-Deeziac Posts: 983Registered Users
    subbrock wrote: »
    i never believed in santa. my parents never made a big deal about it (no letters to/from santa, no cookies and milk left out for him, no annual trips to go visit santa at the mall, etc) but on my presents some would be left by "santa." as soon as i was old enough to read, i noticed that santa and my dad had the same handwriting, so that was the final nail in the coffin.

    back in elementary school, one of my friends still believed in santa by the time we were in 6th grade. all the previous years, we would never tell her that he wasnt real but 6th grade is when we had an intervention and told her that there was no santa.

    this made me laugh out loud. i think my 7 year old is on the fence, but the 9 year old caught on pretty quick.
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  • SleighSleigh Posts: 1,226Registered Users
    Kaia wrote: »
    Sleigh wrote: »
    i was one of the kids that told other kids that santa wasn't real. on a regular basis.

    then the parents would yell at me...and i would tell them not to lie to their kids. that made for fun discussions.

    i still kind of have a hard time with kids believing in santa...because there are kids like me out there...i mean, do you really want someone like me making your child doubt your relationship?

    Too cute!

    We're not sure what we're doing about Santa, because I do think it's kind of wrong to keep such an elaborate lie going to your children, even if it is with the best interests at heart. I have such fond x-mas memories when I believed though! My DH was very traumatized when he found out about Santa, so he doesn't want to do the Santa thing at all. I think we may go through the motions but tell them it's pretend. I don't know.


    i had fun pretending to be honest. my parents knew that i didnt believe but we went through the motions anyways. i mean, there was apart of me that really did wish he was real. kind of like fairies.

    but fairies are real and you cant tell me differently! :toothy10:
    2c hair. maybe a little porous? my hair likes suave, vo5 and the big tease. going to be trying more lush soon. not sure how i feel about dr bronners.

    letting my hair be natural again after getting it straightened. yeah yeah, im a traitor :pirate:
  • KaiaKaia Posts: 8,815Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Sleigh wrote: »
    Kaia wrote: »
    Sleigh wrote: »
    i was one of the kids that told other kids that santa wasn't real. on a regular basis.

    then the parents would yell at me...and i would tell them not to lie to their kids. that made for fun discussions.

    i still kind of have a hard time with kids believing in santa...because there are kids like me out there...i mean, do you really want someone like me making your child doubt your relationship?

    Too cute!

    We're not sure what we're doing about Santa, because I do think it's kind of wrong to keep such an elaborate lie going to your children, even if it is with the best interests at heart. I have such fond x-mas memories when I believed though! My DH was very traumatized when he found out about Santa, so he doesn't want to do the Santa thing at all. I think we may go through the motions but tell them it's pretend. I don't know.


    i had fun pretending to be honest. my parents knew that i didnt believe but we went through the motions anyways. i mean, there was apart of me that really did wish he was real. kind of like fairies.

    but fairies are real and you cant tell me differently! :toothy10:

    That's what I figure. Kids play pretend all the time. They pretend to be doctor, to play house, etc. They know they're not really a doctor, but they have a good time roleplaying anyway. I think Santa can be fun that way too, without the risk of damaging trust.
    *Poster formerly known as Bailey422*

    Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. ~ George Carlin
  • southrncurlssouthrncurls Posts: 152Registered Users
    I believed in Santa until I was 10 and I probably still would believe if it hadn't been for my best friend telling me that your parents are Santa. I was so upset not that my mom had been "lying" to me but because of my "friend" ruining Christmas for me.:cwm21:
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  • SleighSleigh Posts: 1,226Registered Users
    I believed in Santa until I was 10 and I probably still would believe if it hadn't been for my best friend telling me that your parents are Santa. I was so upset not that my mom had been "lying" to me but because of my "friend" ruining Christmas for me.:cwm21:

    in all fairness i didn't want to ruin christmas for anyone.

    ...not saying i was a saint. erm. not at all :D
    2c hair. maybe a little porous? my hair likes suave, vo5 and the big tease. going to be trying more lush soon. not sure how i feel about dr bronners.

    letting my hair be natural again after getting it straightened. yeah yeah, im a traitor :pirate:
  • The New BlackThe New Black Posts: 16,754Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    If I have kids, I won't want them to believe in Santa at all. I might change my mind, but I don't plan on raising them to believe in Santa.
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  • TwoMoonsTwoMoons Posts: 754Registered Users
    I stopped believing at the age of 3 thanks to my sister who was 6 years old at the time. Someone in her 1st grade class announced it to the whole class.
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