Too old for long hair??

vampirecurlsvampirecurls Posts: 50Registered Users
Im 43 and use to have long lush auburn curls. But after being told I have PCOS things took an ugly turn. I ended up loosing a large percentage of my hair and had to wear it short. Now with things under control and the hair growing back I can now have more choices about the look or the style of my hair. But here lies the problem. Most of my family thinks women over 40 should go short. They think I look better with short hair as well. When I attempt to grow it out I get just so far before Im disgusted and given in to the demands and have it cut back. Now Im sitting here with an angled bob thats just shy of my chin line (1930-40) and I dont like it anymore. I want back the long curls and Im not afraid to attempt growing it back. I just need advice on products that I might easliy find that would stimulate the grow faster. And how to deal with the growing out stage that has me feeling akward and silly looking. For now I blow it out smooth but I want to let go of heating tools and just go natural.
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Comments

  • CurlyHazeCurlyHaze Posts: 295Registered Users
    Hello,

    Well, I am 42 and I have decided not to cut my hair until I hit 50 well atleast that is what the plan is today. The way I feel about it is. There is a difference between long hair and long pretty hair. so if you think you can grow your hair out and it will still look great then by all means grow it out. But I do have to say when i see a women with long stringy hair that looks really unhealthy I just wonder why she doesn't cut it.

    All that being said you didn't say if you are cg or using all natural products, I think that is a good start for growing your hair out. they say scalp massage is good to stimulate hair growth. while you are cowashing rub scalp with the pads of your fingers in circular motion.

    good luck on growing your hair out.
    Very Thick dry 3b BSL.
    Fine, medium porosity
    Right now I am using GVP conditioning balm for cowash and RO,
    my hair loves protein.
    for styling my base is BRHG I can use it alone but prefer with Curl Keeper. I sulphate poo once a month or so as needed.
    http://public.fotki.com/CurlyHaze/
  • rudeechickrudeechick Posts: 6,726Registered Users
    First of all, Curlyhaze, yer avatar hair is stunning!

    Back to business: VampireCurls- Congrats on the renewed health! We take so much for granted til we are faced with a test.

    Honey, grow your hair! Check with your doc, but I know (from a go-round with Alopecia last year) that Biotin helps, Omega 3s, etc. They sell some hair growth formula type vitamins if you prefer one pill. Eat clean. And by all means, if you are not CG, go GC.

    Healthy hair always looks great! There are many older celebs who still rock long hair to serve as your example. But at the end of the day, YOU need to love what you see when you look in the mirror. I cant tell you how to deal with tactless or insensitive relatives.... But if you post pics here, you will get honest feedback and unconditional support!

    Good luck and Good Health!
    Curls,Coils,Waves & WhatKnot:geek:
    3miii/My HGs tame bulk&frizz/Give definition w/o crunch
    My Photobucket Album
  • rouquinnerouquinne Posts: 13,737Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    another PCOS sufferer here - lately i've been losing a LOT of hair, but that isn't stopping me from trying to grow it out!

    if you want long hair - GO FOR IT!!!

    i wear long wigs on a regular basis and love 'em!

    :D
    My blog:

    http://labellatestarossa.blogspot.ca/

    Little Mother of all the Roaches, President-for-Life of the MAC Harlots!
  • janeylizjaneyliz Posts: 777Registered Users
    Glad you're on the mend :)

    It's your hair and you wear it however you want to - tell everyone else to naff off!

    I went through a similar thing earlier in the year as everyone I work with has neat, straight bobs or shorter styles (how boring) and I wondered if I should have BC and 'conform'. We all went out for a meal and hair came up in conversation - the rest of the team all said how much they envy my long curls and wish they had the nerve to be different (we work in a complete control freak environment - and they all wear suits to work and I tend to go for a smart but more bohemian look).

    Do your own thing and be proud :love4:
    Marchioness Chinoise in the land of Mancunia Productia Junkia in the Order of the Curly Crusaders

    DT: AOHR
    Wash: Anita Grant babassu bar
    Leave-in: Body Shop cotton seed curl boost with manuka honey mixed in
    Gel: Umberto Giannini Curl Friends scrunching gel
    Odds & ends Lime juice, honey, Anita Grant cafe latte
    I brush with a Tangle Teezer & love Flexi-8's
    www.public.fotki.com/janeyliz
    www.thelilyfoundation.org.uk
  • SystemSystem Posts: 39,060 Administrator
    Grow your hair out for long as you want - for life!
    Hair length has 0% to do with age. It would all break off to short if we were genetically meant to have short hair after 30, 40, or whatever "magic" age.
  • rudeechickrudeechick Posts: 6,726Registered Users
    Speckla wrote: »
    Grow your hair out for long as you want - for life!
    Hair length has 0% to do with age. It would all break off to short if we were genetically meant to have short hair after 30, 40, or whatever "magic" age.
    Lol... love that theory... So, assuming that is correct.... what else would break off when we know longer are meant to have it??
    Curls,Coils,Waves & WhatKnot:geek:
    3miii/My HGs tame bulk&frizz/Give definition w/o crunch
    My Photobucket Album
  • SystemSystem Posts: 39,060 Administrator
    rudeechick wrote: »
    Speckla wrote: »
    Grow your hair out for long as you want - for life!
    Hair length has 0% to do with age. It would all break off to short if we were genetically meant to have short hair after 30, 40, or whatever "magic" age.
    Lol... love that theory... So, assuming that is correct.... what else would break off when we know longer are meant to have it??

    Hey, things droop and sag but they don't break off -- no matter how much closer they are to the ground.:sign5:
  • banjocurlbanjocurl Posts: 1,031Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Most of my family thinks women over 40 should go short. They think I look better with short hair as well. When I attempt to grow it out I get just so far before Im disgusted and given in to the demands and have it cut back.

    hogwash my dear. glad you have your health back and can grow your hair. i just turned 59 and my hair is almost waist length and colored and CURLY 3B.
    f---- em i say. last year i went to my 40th high school reunion. i was the only one there with long curly hair, except for someone with very frizzy unstyled long hair--it was red so it looked cool anyway. i did get lots of compliments. here is a shot of me with some of my friends i have known for 50+ years. i think we look pretty good, considering...:)
    Susan suburban NY
    3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
    CG since 11/11/04
    http://public.fotki.com/banjolady/
    PW: banjo
    HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls
  • rouquinnerouquinne Posts: 13,737Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    banjo, love your hair - thanks for the validation!

    :D
    My blog:

    http://labellatestarossa.blogspot.ca/

    Little Mother of all the Roaches, President-for-Life of the MAC Harlots!
  • DEL2CDEL2C Posts: 6,418Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    Whenever people say that women over 40 should cut their hair I always tell them look at Jane Seymour!!! She's beautiful and has always had long beautiful hair. I'm not cutting mine any time soon!
    Discovered CG 2007

    2C Fia BSL/Thick/Med-Coarse/Low(crown)-Normal Porosity Protein and Oil Sensitive

    Link-Spritz & Condish Washing:glasses7:

    I'm aCurlJunkieJunky :love4:

    My hair LOVES Coconut DESPISES Soap Bars :tongue6:


    CJRehab or H&B Fix, Deva NO POO, EO Rose & Cham POO & Condish, CJ CurlFix, CJ Pattern Pusha, CJ CIAB, SS FHG, KCCC, BRHG, AG Mousse Gel, ACV Rinses,Shikakai Conditioning Hair Rinse.
  • cara4curlscara4curls Posts: 336Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    Jeez - is that tired old rule still around? LOL! Granted, a bunch of women tend to look better with shorter hair when they get older, but certainly not all! It really depends on the woman's whole look, her kind of hair, her lifestyle, and her features. I had short hair for years, but now it is a good shoulder-length(I know - this doesn't sound long for those of you who have truly long hair, but it's all relative), and it is looking curlier as it grows too. I'm a mixed texture 2C - 3A, and my hair LOVES humidity making it curl up more. I'm with banjocurl on this one with her attitude. BTW, banjocurl, your hair looks beautiful - keep on rockin' it!
    This keeps me motivated to keep growing it - I've had no haircut(except for me trimming my bangs)since late June!
    health-conscious, visionary artist in transition
  • banjocurlbanjocurl Posts: 1,031Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    cara4curls wrote: »
    Jeez - is that tired old rule still around? I'm with banjocurl on this one with her attitude. BTW, banjocurl, your hair looks beautiful - keep on rockin' it!
    This keeps me motivated to keep growing it - I've had no haircut(except for me trimming my bangs)since late June!

    thanks cara and roquine--it is really fun to have long hair now with all the new knowledge about curls and keeping hair healthy. people think it is a hassle but it is really no trouble at all. actually i am putting up videos of hair styling on youtube now--search under lazycurls. i chose a new acct bc i don't want my music or dog subscribers seeing me in the shower glopping conditioner by the pound on my hair..
    Susan suburban NY
    3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
    CG since 11/11/04
    http://public.fotki.com/banjolady/
    PW: banjo
    HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls
  • CurlyHazeCurlyHaze Posts: 295Registered Users
    thank you rudechick I have been working hard and learning lots on here.

    I always thought women over 40 cut it for convenience and ease of care, I prefer long hair, especially if it is in good health.

    I say just let it grow if you want.
    Very Thick dry 3b BSL.
    Fine, medium porosity
    Right now I am using GVP conditioning balm for cowash and RO,
    my hair loves protein.
    for styling my base is BRHG I can use it alone but prefer with Curl Keeper. I sulphate poo once a month or so as needed.
    http://public.fotki.com/CurlyHaze/
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Posts: 2,551Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    cara4curls wrote: »
    Jeez - is that tired old rule still around? LOL! Granted, a bunch of women tend to look better with shorter hair when they get older, but certainly not all! It really depends on the woman's whole look, her kind of hair, her lifestyle, and her features.

    I definitely agree with the bolded. If you want long hair don't let anyone tell you how you should wear it. BUT, some older women do not look good with their hair longer. If they want to wear it like that they should, but it's naive to believe we all look good with our chosen hairstyle/length no matter what else is going on with our faces.
  • banjocurlbanjocurl Posts: 1,031Registered Users Curl Connoisseur

    I definitely agree with the bolded. If you want long hair don't let anyone tell you how you should wear it. BUT, some older women do not look good with their hair longer. If they want to wear it like that they should, but it's naive to believe we all look good with our chosen hairstyle/length no matter what else is going on with our faces.
    yeah i hope that if that is the case with me and i am too blind to see it that someone will tell me. i am not a fan of the "old woman with ratty gray hair scraggling down her back" look, or the wrinkled old woman with the artificially colored hair that looks harsh and fake.
    however many older women have beautiful long hair that looks great on them.
    Susan suburban NY
    3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
    CG since 11/11/04
    http://public.fotki.com/banjolady/
    PW: banjo
    HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls
  • JasperJasper Posts: 4Registered Users
    I can relate, although I'm in my late 30s. I spent the last 5 or 10 years believing that long hair wasn't professional or polished. Then I saw a few old photos of my long spirals and decided to start growing it back. I don't think there's one right length for a certain age, it's all based on your hair, face shape, body type. Healthy, well-cared for hair that suits the individual is beautiful, no matter what the length.
  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] Posts: 0 Curl Neophyte
    VC, I think it's great when someone chooses to grow/keep long hair when others think that being over 40 dictates wearing a bob. I found that going CG was a wonderful incentive to grow my hair. I don't think I would have attempted it if it meant blow drying and straightening it every day. Ack!
    Maudie


    CO wash-Vo5 Kiwi Lime
    Regular CO-Tresemme Naturals Silicone Free
    Deep CO-Aussie 3 Minute Miracle

    Shampoo-Jhirmack Silver Plus Ageless once a week
    Cream-Garnier Fructis Sleek $ Shine Leave-In Conditioning
    Gels-LA Looks Sport

    Going silver-last hair color 4/10/15
  • mpgirlmpgirl Posts: 1,163Registered Users
    CurlyHaze wrote: »
    thank you rudechick I have been working hard and learning lots on here.

    I always thought women over 40 cut it for convenience and ease of care, I prefer long hair, especially if it is in good health.

    I say just let it grow if you want.
    Not to guano, but CurlyHaze, I just looked at your latest Fotki and WOW! You may now be one of my hair idols!

    I'm 50 and am growing my hair out. What I have learned over the last year of caring for my hair is that nobody is more obsessed with my hair than me! If I'm happy with my hair who cares about everybody else? No one has ever said anything truly negative about my hair (even family) so I choose to assume that it looks as great as I think it does!:laughing4: (I'm a big fan of creating my own reality)

    If you want to grow your hair DO IT! We will all support you even if no one else will.
    3b spirals, fine texture, normal porosity, dense
    Picasa:
    Link
    Deva Low Poo
    Suave Naturals Coconut for detangling
    Renpure Organics conditioner/leave-in
    Homemade FSG
    KCCC
    Curl Junkie Stuff
    BRHG


    Nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect. -wabi-sabi

  • CurlyHazeCurlyHaze Posts: 295Registered Users
    mpgirl wrote: »
    CurlyHaze wrote: »
    thank you rudechick I have been working hard and learning lots on here.

    I always thought women over 40 cut it for convenience and ease of care, I prefer long hair, especially if it is in good health.

    I say just let it grow if you want.
    Not to guano, but CurlyHaze, I just looked at your latest Fotki and WOW! You may now be one of my hair idols!

    I'm 50 and am growing my hair out. What I have learned over the last year of caring for my hair is that nobody is more obsessed with my hair than me! If I'm happy with my hair who cares about everybody else? No one has ever said anything truly negative about my hair (even family) so I choose to assume that it looks as great as I think it does!:laughing4: (I'm a big fan of creating my own reality)

    If you want to grow your hair DO IT! We will all support you even if no one else will.

    Thanks mpgirl your curls have come a long way you look great. keep up the grow out work.
    Very Thick dry 3b BSL.
    Fine, medium porosity
    Right now I am using GVP conditioning balm for cowash and RO,
    my hair loves protein.
    for styling my base is BRHG I can use it alone but prefer with Curl Keeper. I sulphate poo once a month or so as needed.
    http://public.fotki.com/CurlyHaze/
  • susancnwsusancnw Posts: 1,374Registered Users Curl Novice
    I'm going to Houston next Thur for my mom's BD on Sat. A week ago my hair was just below bra strap length when dry...I got 2-1/2" cut and now it is just below my shoulders....my own mom spent years telling me to enjoy it long while I was young as there appears to be a law that you have to cut it when you turn 40. Well, 49 here and still long. And I'll continue to grow it out as long as it stays healthy (I had to get dead/split stuff off) and some shape to it...I did color it this week and it is supposed to be a dark blonde...not sure what happened, maybe wrong developer, but it'll be blonde again by the time I hit Houston...I do think Mom would have a fit if it were not blonde. ;D See, keeping mom happy...
    My son wears combat boots (and a parachute). So does my son-in-law.
    The older I get, the less patience I have with cleverness. Thomas Sowell.
    Resolve to perform what you ought. Perform without fail what you resolve. Benjamin Franklin.
    Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. Mark Twain.

    s-event.png

  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Posts: 9,777Registered Users Curl Virtuoso
    I love long hair & I like myself in long hair. I don't care that I am 57. I will probably always have it long. I may do more updo's as I get older. My hair is shorter now then I like, but I have ends that need to be cut off. I really pamper my hair, but my ends are damaged. My hairdresser said it may be due to the environment, very dry weather & hard water. I have very fine, thin hair. I think I have had my last haircut with the hairdresser. He seems to be a bit scissor happy.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • latetocurlslatetocurls Posts: 127Registered Users
    I'm 59 (and pushing 60 with both hands ;-) ) and I've been letting my hair grow for the past two years. It's shoulder length now and the longest it's been in a very long time. The "rule" about cutting your hair after 40 was made by the previous generation. We boomers have always made our own rules and there's no reason to stop now. I'm going to keep on letting it grow out until I decide it's long enough. As long as it looks good on me, who's to say what I should do with my hair.
    Laura

    Fine, 3A, but a lot of it.

    http://public.fotki.com/latetocurls/

    PW: Curly
  • misspammisspam Posts: 5,318Registered Users
    Lotsawaves wrote: »
    I love long hair & I like myself in long hair. I don't care that I am 57. I will probably always have it long. I may do more updo's as I get older. My hair is shorter now then I like, but I have ends that need to be cut off. I really pamper my hair, but my ends are damaged. My hairdresser said it may be due to the environment, very dry weather & hard water. I have very fine, thin hair. I think I have had my last haircut with the hairdresser. He seems to be a bit scissor happy.

    I agree with the bolded. I am 45 and my hair is now about 3 inches past my shoulders in the back. I have had varying lengths through the years and have always preferred it long. It is just so versatile. If I am having a bad hair day, I can always put it up and try a new updo. I also feel more feminine with longer hair.

    Classic updos are always an option for aging faces. As long as they are not too tight and severely pulled back, I think they are very flattering. I plan on being a silver granny with a classic Katherine Hepburn bun.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • MaloryMalory Posts: 379Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I don't think it depends on your chronological age as much as your appearance.

    If you have very thin, lifeless, scraggly hair, whether it is due to age, medical isues or just having naturally thin hair, then you should not wear it long.

    If your face tends to look long and drawn, saggy and/or tired looking, which once again may or may not be due to age, then you shouldn't wear your hair long.

    On the other hand, if you are 60 years old, with a thick, full head of healthy-looking hair, no lines or wrinkles and round, rosy cheeks, then you can wear your hair long.

    It also depends on your face shape. Longer hair makes your face look thinner, shorter hair makes your face look fatter and gives you fullness on the sides of your face.

    ETA: One of the things that makes a woman look old to me is if she has very thin hair - I don't mean the thinness of each hair strand but the volume of hair; if you look at the back of her head you can see space in between the hairs.
  • mpgirlmpgirl Posts: 1,163Registered Users
    misspam wrote: »
    Lotsawaves wrote: »
    I love long hair & I like myself in long hair. I don't care that I am 57. I will probably always have it long. I may do more updo's as I get older. My hair is shorter now then I like, but I have ends that need to be cut off. I really pamper my hair, but my ends are damaged. My hairdresser said it may be due to the environment, very dry weather & hard water. I have very fine, thin hair. I think I have had my last haircut with the hairdresser. He seems to be a bit scissor happy.

    I agree with the bolded. I am 45 and my hair is now about 3 inches past my shoulders in the back. I have had varying lengths through the years and have always preferred it long. It is just so versatile. If I am having a bad hair day, I can always put it up and try a new updo. I also feel more feminine with longer hair.

    Classic updos are always an option for aging faces. As long as they are not too tight and severely pulled back, I I plan on being a silver granny with a classic Katherine Hepburn bun.

    Amen, sister! Me too!
    3b spirals, fine texture, normal porosity, dense
    Picasa:
    Link
    Deva Low Poo
    Suave Naturals Coconut for detangling
    Renpure Organics conditioner/leave-in
    Homemade FSG
    KCCC
    Curl Junkie Stuff
    BRHG


    Nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect. -wabi-sabi

  • hadtochangemynamehadtochangemyname Posts: 628Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    Speckla wrote: »
    Grow your hair out for long as you want - for life!
    Hair length has 0% to do with age. It would all break off to short if we were genetically meant to have short hair after 30, 40, or whatever "magic" age.

    hmmm maybe that is why my hair is falling out? Because I will be 40 in 2 days? LOL

    actually I am only half-laughing, genetically I am programmed to be bald at 60. not fun.

    If you can have a full head of long hair, by all means grow it long! I know a lot of us cut it as we get older because it thins so much that it would look scraggly/witchy when long, and shorter styles make it look fuller, along with the fact that hair texture changes when hair goes to gray.
    [FONT=georgia, bookman old style, palatino linotype, book antiqua, palatino, trebuchet ms, helvetica, garamond, sans-serif, arial, verdana, avante garde, century gothic, comic sans ms, times, times new roman, serif]
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  • SystemSystem Posts: 39,060 Administrator
    Speckla wrote: »
    Grow your hair out for long as you want - for life!
    Hair length has 0% to do with age. It would all break off to short if we were genetically meant to have short hair after 30, 40, or whatever "magic" age.

    hmmm maybe that is why my hair is falling out? Because I will be 40 in 2 days? LOL

    actually I am only half-laughing, genetically I am programmed to be bald at 60. not fun.

    If you can have a full head of long hair, by all means grow it long! I know a lot of us cut it as we get older because it thins so much that it would look scraggly/witchy when long, and shorter styles make it look fuller, along with the fact that hair texture changes when hair goes to gray.


    Hair, or lackthereof, will not change the fact that you have a beautiful face. Go shorter if it's getting thinner. Go straighter if it makes it fuller and easier for you to deal with. Just don't go away. ;)
  • wavycurly40+wavycurly40+ Posts: 2,017Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I can think of only one good reason for the "shorter hair over 40" rule, and the good news is: it doesn't really apply to curlies or wavies, in my opinion. Long, straight hair could, in some cases, kind of drag your features down and make you look tired and/or older. (I expect this also depends on face shape, etc., as well as many other factors). But curlies and wavies usually have waves, curls and or tendrils next to the face that create a nice, perky "lifted" look, which would alleviate this concern.

    The bottom line is -- if longer hair looks good on you, go for it!

    Wurly and proud!
    Modified CG since 2008.
  • WileE-DeadWileE-Dead Banned Posts: 24,963Banned Users Curl Neophyte
    I just got a trim the other day & my hair dresser said she can't imagine me w/ really short hair. Shoulder length is about as short as I go & just long enough to put it up! :toothy10:
    screw everyone else! lol
    
    0004.gif

    Ever since the sports thread wars I have sensed a special connection between [edit] & Wile. Like the connection oil has to water. I almost can't speak of it. Wait....my eyes are misting. ~asq
    Let’s just stay together and tell the world to kiss our ass. ~P


  • banjocurlbanjocurl Posts: 1,031Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Malory wrote: »
    I don't think it depends on your chronological age as much as your appearance.

    On the other hand, if you are 60 years old, with a thick, full head of healthy-looking hair, no lines or wrinkles and round, rosy cheeks, then you can wear your hair long.


    sounds like a good goal to me!! we'll see what happens in november of 2009 :)
    Susan suburban NY
    3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
    CG since 11/11/04
    http://public.fotki.com/banjolady/
    PW: banjo
    HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls

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