CurlTalk

Help me : (

Karua12Karua12 Posts: 155Registered Users
Hi everyone! This site has helped me alot in appreciating and loving the natural hair that I barely remember (relaxed at 10). I'm starting to love running my hands through the about 1 1/2 inches of new growth and my boyfriend loves it too and supporting me the whole way in my decision. However, I have a problem.

I don't really understand how to take care of my hair during the transitioning, but while I wasn't home (I go to a boarding high school) it wasn't an issue since my (non-black) friends find it very interesting. However, my mom hates the way my hair looks and doesn't understand why I want to transition. I'm not very good at braiding and such, and I'm happy that my hair is healthy (I've been using natural oils and refusing my mom to use any of that mineral oil and heat nonsense in my hair). So I ask you, are there any quite easy ways other than a ponytail for my hair to be "better-looking" to my mother? (I've pretty much been washing and going this whole time.)

Also : ( It's been hard for me to convince my mom that she should stop trying to run a comb through the new growth since she's only breaking off the relaxed hair...
Hey everyone!~ I've BCed! Yay! (13 month transition)
Last Perm: March 23, 2008
BC: April 24, 2009

Goals: To learn how to style my hair and continue to grow it healthy and happy!
Hair type: :o 4b near the temples, 3c in the back/nape and 4a everywhere! Mostly coily-curly with medium-fine strands and medium thickness.


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Comments

  • Flower princessFlower princess Posts: 608Registered Users
    Take a look at this i know you said you can twist e.t.c.but there are also other styles you can try:
    http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/showthread.php?t=45449

    This site is really helpful take a look at it:
    /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fmotowngirl.com%2Fcontent%2Fcontent%2Fview%2F1%2F3%2F" class="Popup

    hope this helps:)
    All Hair is Good Hair!

    It's Not What's ON Your Head, But What's IN Your Head!

    Please join/follow my new blog /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fvividthoughtsofglory.blogspot.com%2F" class="Popup
  • mozekemozeke Posts: 480Registered Users
    Karua12- First let me say congrats on transitioning. I am very glad you have ppl who are supporting you and encouraging you. As for your mom, she's like most older black folks who have been taught that our hair is ugly. To some extent it's kinda like brainwashing someone. If you've been taught the same thing over and over your entire life then it's really hard to change, not impossible but hard. I encourage you to keep it up and don't relax. Now her trying to comb through your hair, try not to let her but if she must just spritz it with water first and hand her a w i d e tooth comb to cut down on breakage. Also you may want to include her in your transition. Make it a learning experience for the both of you since she doesn't understand why you want to be natural. This is the best time to show her. As for styles I agree with flower princess. Check out those sites. You can also browse fotkis to see what others have done. Also if you know someone who can braid or do hair perhaps you could let them do it. If you don't work and have much cash then maybe a trade would work. Sorry so long, hth.
    Last relaxer: 12/10/07
    BC date: 5/2/08
    It's your hair...do what you wanna do
  • Karua12Karua12 Posts: 155Registered Users
    Thanks alot for the advice :3. My mom is a bit more open now and helping me along more. Also, by looking around the web, I've gotten *much* better at doing two strand twists and that's working out for me. However, how can I do them so that the part where the twists meet the scalp, my hair is less poofy and untwisted, and how can I make the ends stop from unwravelling? :toothy7:Thanks alot!

    I'll try to post pictures of my hair soon so I could perhaps make it easier, but from what I see I think most of my hair (from the crown outwards) is 3c or 4a (I can never really tell the difference) because they form really easy little curls. However, it's the ring around my hair (from the edges to about an inch in) that are coarse and unruly : / I wonder if my hair is really like that because from what I remember, my hair was mostly all one texture.

    It's really hard to tell what my texture might be like because my dad is black and my mom is part Indian (when she grows her hair out a bit it looks like 3b) and my mom is horrible at explaining how my hair used to be... (she doesn't see it as curly, just nappy, but I'm trying to explain to her that all hair like that isn't the same .___.')
    Hey everyone!~ I've BCed! Yay! (13 month transition)
    Last Perm: March 23, 2008
    BC: April 24, 2009

    Goals: To learn how to style my hair and continue to grow it healthy and happy!
    Hair type: :o 4b near the temples, 3c in the back/nape and 4a everywhere! Mostly coily-curly with medium-fine strands and medium thickness.


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  • Flower princessFlower princess Posts: 608Registered Users
    Karua12 wrote: »
    Thanks alot for the advice :3. My mom is a bit more open now and helping me along more. Also, by looking around the web, I've gotten *much* better at doing two strand twists and that's working out for me. However, how can I do them so that the part where the twists meet the scalp, my hair is less poofy and untwisted, and how can I make the ends stop from unwravelling? :toothy7:Thanks alot!

    I'll try to post pictures of my hair soon so I could perhaps make it easier, but from what I see I think most of my hair (from the crown outwards) is 3c or 4a (I can never really tell the difference) because they form really easy little curls. However, it's the ring around my hair (from the edges to about an inch in) that are coarse and unruly : / I wonder if my hair is really like that because from what I remember, my hair was mostly all one texture.

    It's really hard to tell what my texture might be like because my dad is black and my mom is part Indian (when she grows her hair out a bit it looks like 3b) and my mom is horrible at explaining how my hair used to be... (she doesn't see it as curly, just nappy, but I'm trying to explain to her that all hair like that isn't the same .___.')


    You can use something like this:

    /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.organicrootstimulator.com%2Fnhs%2Fproducts%2Fnaturalproducts.htm" class="Popup

    or
    [FONT=Arial,Helvetica,Geneva,Sans-serif]Jamaican Mango & Lime Locking Gel or Locking Creme Wax [/FONT]

    /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rastagroup.com%2Fhtml%2Fjamaican_mango___lime_products.htm" class="Popup


    You can find this products easily esp.the ors one at stores that sell African-American hair products it will help keep your ends twisted if you don't want to use hair bands.I can wait to see your pic .HTH:)
    All Hair is Good Hair!

    It's Not What's ON Your Head, But What's IN Your Head!

    Please join/follow my new blog /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2Fvividthoughtsofglory.blogspot.com%2F" class="Popup
  • blackhoney112blackhoney112 Posts: 126Registered Users
    Have you thought about getting braids...they really helped me out during the early part of my transition www.growafrohairlong.com is an excellent resource for caring for your braids and natural hair. HTH and Good luck transitioning, its been 2 years form me so I know you can do it!:wink:
    3c/4a
    Transitioning
    Following C&G method
    Fav products: Kenra MC, Misskey 10en1, VO5 moisturemilks, ACV rinses, Rhassoul clay & WGO
    pw: Romeo
    My hair album
  • Karua12Karua12 Posts: 155Registered Users
    Both of you, thanks so much for the advice! It's going on 5 months of transitioning now, and I notice that my hair is getting a lot softer and managable thanks to searching around the site for natural products and making some of my own things :toothy7:I've turned into a bit of a product junkie. I'll post pictures when I get a new camera~

    Just another question though. I have more than 2 inches in most sections and a bit less than 2 inches in others. I co-wash my hair 2 times a week. When you were in my situation, how often did you wash your hair? I'm scared to do it any more than that because I find that my natural hair detangles like a dream with the [buylink=http://www.curlmart.com/Kinky-Curly-Knot-Today-p-207.html?utm_source=naturallycurly.com&utm_medium=text-link&utm_content=curltalk-post-text&utm_campaign=kinkycurly-knot-today-leaveindetangler]Knot Today[/buylink], but I get so many tangles in my relaxed hair : ( Is that normal? Even though I find that 3/4 of the hair in the wide-tooth comb are straight from my scalp, I'm afraid I'm putting too much stress on my hair...
    Hey everyone!~ I've BCed! Yay! (13 month transition)
    Last Perm: March 23, 2008
    BC: April 24, 2009

    Goals: To learn how to style my hair and continue to grow it healthy and happy!
    Hair type: :o 4b near the temples, 3c in the back/nape and 4a everywhere! Mostly coily-curly with medium-fine strands and medium thickness.


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