PCOS/Ugly Duckling Phase

MixedUpCurlyChickMixedUpCurlyChick Registered Users Posts: 2,568 Curl Neophyte
Ok, first lemme say I'm so glad someone even started a PCOS thread on here. I was very impressed! Now I'm wondering if anyone is in the same or similar boat as I am.

I just recently stopped wearing weaves and went natural, I'm overweight, my hair is really short and helmetey and I just feel unattractive. I don't have any major acne but I do have unwanted hair that I have to constantly stay on so nobody is the wiser lol.

I just feel like I'm going through this kinda ugly ducking thing. When I was wearing weaves, I sorta hid behind my hair (which nobody suspected was purchased unless I told them lol). So now I feel all *exposed.*

I have lost 6 lbs since starting the Metformin and exercising (its been 1 mth) but I still have this overwhelming feeling that I'm just not "pretty enough."

I know getting used to the natural transition takes some getting used to, but being overweight with short hair isn't exactly a girl's dream. What to do? Anyone else feel like this? Please help!
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Comments

  • curlygirlymecurlygirlyme Registered Users Posts: 1,340
    You are not alone. Everyone I know who has it feels the same. It might not be the same way you feel about your hair. Some of my friends feel like they may not be a total woman (you know with the strange hair growth, not able to have children, etc.), some can't stand the weight, others feel like it's robbed them of their old lives, etc.

    I think most women who have PCOS or PCOD feel like their lives have been altered in such a way that they no longer feel comfortable in their own skin. It's not fun. But I think (well from spending time with other ladies in the same boat) that we've got to hope and get to action so that things can get better so we just keep trying and it's one of those illnesses that is so different for everyone that it's hard to tell where it's going to reach a point when you can take the upper hand over it. Good luck and incase you're feeling down you might try http://www.soulcysters.com/

    There's a message board and you might be able to meet some people in your state and you might be able to set up a meeting... I know people have done it in the past.
  • MixedUpCurlyChickMixedUpCurlyChick Registered Users Posts: 2,568 Curl Neophyte
    Thank You SO Much. Yes, I have felt that way you described as well. Its such an odd thing b/c if u chose to tell ppl, it almost sounds like ur making it up and like u should "get over it." I'm not sure if I've visted that site before but I will check it out! Now, this may be a dumb question, but what is the diff between PCOS and PCOD?
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  • mixed_beauty85mixed_beauty85 Registered Users Posts: 421
    ugh i can definitely relate with u guys. i used to have nice clear skin. now like every once in a while i'll have a nasty breakout on my face, especially if i eat too many sweets and a week before my period starts. i hate having pcos so much:thumbdown:
  • earcmraearcmra Registered Users Posts: 146
    I feel this same way a lot of the time! Please know that you are not alone! PCOS is a nasty disease, it really is. It affects so many different areas of life that it can really be a downer. I've been battling PCOS since I was 15.

    Here are some suggestions that might help:

    1) There are medications that can help minimize the excess hair. Spironolactone is one that a lot of PCOS-sufferers have had good results with. Spironolactone can also help reduce the acne. If you're interested in trying that route, consult with your primary care doctor or a dermatologist.

    2) Congrats on exercising for one month. That's a great start! Continuing to exercise will likely help you loose a bit more weight and help you to feel better about yourself as well. I've been in a bit of a funk lately and haven't exercised like I used to, and I've noticed a huge (negative) difference.

    3) Try to realize that there are many types of beautiful, and that PCOS doesn't have to take away your personality, humor, intelligence, or creativity. Physical looks are only one aspect of life.
  • mixed_beauty85mixed_beauty85 Registered Users Posts: 421
    wow those were some really good words earcmra, thanks for posting
  • MixedUpCurlyChickMixedUpCurlyChick Registered Users Posts: 2,568 Curl Neophyte
    Thank u so much for the kind words :angel5:

    I've been on the Spironolactone for a few weeks so I guess we'll see. In a lot of ways I am used to having to wax. I mean, it could be worse. I've seen a lot worse. But I have never really gotten used to being overweight. I guess I just have to keep up the exercise. I've been in a funk too (I also have insomnia and social anxiety disorder lol so I'm having a great time as of late)

    But thanks so much for ur post, Earcmra. I'm sure lots of ppl can benefit from ur words :toothy4:
    earcmra wrote: »
    I feel this same way a lot of the time! Please know that you are not alone! PCOS is a nasty disease, it really is. It affects so many different areas of life that it can really be a downer. I've been battling PCOS since I was 15.

    Here are some suggestions that might help:

    1) There are medications that can help minimize the excess hair. Spironolactone is one that a lot of PCOS-sufferers have had good results with. Spironolactone can also help reduce the acne. If you're interested in trying that route, consult with your primary care doctor or a dermatologist.

    2) Congrats on exercising for one month. That's a great start! Continuing to exercise will likely help you loose a bit more weight and help you to feel better about yourself as well. I've been in a bit of a funk lately and haven't exercised like I used to, and I've noticed a huge (negative) difference.

    3) Try to realize that there are many types of beautiful, and that PCOS doesn't have to take away your personality, humor, intelligence, or creativity. Physical looks are only one aspect of life.
    comic-p.jpg
  • mixed_beauty85mixed_beauty85 Registered Users Posts: 421
    ya sumtimes i have trouble sleeping as well, not sure if it has anything to do with the pcos. i also feel depressed at times, i think about my miscarriage for some strange reason, and i know it this has to b because of the pcos
  • MixedUpCurlyChickMixedUpCurlyChick Registered Users Posts: 2,568 Curl Neophyte
    I am sorry u had to go through that, Mixed. Are u still trying for a baby? Are u periods regulated?
    ya sumtimes i have trouble sleeping as well, not sure if it has anything to do with the pcos. i also feel depressed at times, i think about my miscarriage for some strange reason, and i know it this has to b because of the pcos
    comic-p.jpg
  • mixed_beauty85mixed_beauty85 Registered Users Posts: 421
    I am sorry u had to go through that, Mixed. Are u still trying for a baby? Are u periods regulated?
    ya sumtimes i have trouble sleeping as well, not sure if it has anything to do with the pcos. i also feel depressed at times, i think about my miscarriage for some strange reason, and i know it this has to b because of the pcos

    yes i am still trying really hard to have a baby. my miscarriage was back in the summer of 2006, so all this time i have had no luck in getting pregnant again. although i just got diagnosed with PCOS just last year, so that might have something to do with it. my doctor wants me to do all these tests and stuff but i dunno now. i really dont feel like being poked and looked at and stuff. i dunno if i just made sense just now. lol

    as for my periods, im not quite sure if they are regular yet, but they have been coming every month. i still have no idea though when exactly it is going to come.
  • MixedUpCurlyChickMixedUpCurlyChick Registered Users Posts: 2,568 Curl Neophyte
    Beauty,

    I just commented to u in the other thread before I read this one, but also, if ur periods are coming every mth, that is an excellent start. Some women with PCOS cannot get a period. That was one of the first questions the docs asked me. I was like "yeah I get my period, but some yrs ago I missed it a cpl times."

    I am sorry to hear that u had a miscarriage. I have no idea what that must be like. However, I do think its a very good sign that ur getting periods.
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  • mixed_beauty85mixed_beauty85 Registered Users Posts: 421
    thanks mixedupcurlychick,

    but for some reason my period did not come this month. the last one ended early this month, so i dunno if that has sumthing to do with it. i know that my gyn told me that my period might skip a cycle or two still even though i am on meds. i dunno...
  • CurlyBratCurlyBrat Registered Users Posts: 445
    I have been diagnosed with PCOS and Type 2 Diabetes since 2001. It's so discouraging sometimes to feel like no matter what you do, you're stuck in that 'ugly duckling' mode... I totally understand!!

    I have tried the spironilactone (which is technically a diuretic that is supposed to help the hair growth/loss) but my blood pressure dropped too low and I was passing out!! So... I'm just plucking my chin daily and praying that the hair on my head stops falling out!! I've also had a BIG acne problem now. I never had a single blemish all through my teen years, and now all of a sudden I have really bad breakouts all along my chin/jawline, behind my ears, on my scalp and around my mouth. Nothing above the nose-line. Funny thing is... ALL my hormone levels are coming back completely normal.

    So... in addition to trying to control my curls, I have to look for products that don't irritate the breakouts!

    It does get frustrating and feels like there is never an end... but don't give up!!! You're NOT alone... and all the things you are doing are FANTASTIC changes! Keep up the great job!! I really hope that you find things that work for you and help you feel better about how you look as well as just FEEL better!!
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  • mixed_beauty85mixed_beauty85 Registered Users Posts: 421
    yes i feel for u curlybrat about the acne.i used to have really good skin before PCOS. now i breakout around the chin area and under my jawline, ugh i hate it. i recently tried proactiv too to try and control these breakouts. it helped a lil bit but it was drying out my skin waay too much and made my skin itch. i was also getting nasty breakouts by my jawline. i only used it for about 3 weeks, but i decided to stop because i hate having my skin so dry. i think proactiv works best for people who have acne really bad, cuz it worked wonders for my husband
  • MixedUpCurlyChickMixedUpCurlyChick Registered Users Posts: 2,568 Curl Neophyte
    CurlyBrat,

    Thanks so much for sharing. I think its great that there are places we can go online and share stories with other women b/c the women I know are like "polycistic what?"

    Since u have Diabetes, how do u deal with sugar? Do u just stay away from it? I just eat a lot less than I did before b/c I honestly feel that I "can't" not each sugar.
    CurlyBrat wrote: »
    I have been diagnosed with PCOS and Type 2 Diabetes since 2001. It's so discouraging sometimes to feel like no matter what you do, you're stuck in that 'ugly duckling' mode... I totally understand!!

    I have tried the spironilactone (which is technically a diuretic that is supposed to help the hair growth/loss) but my blood pressure dropped too low and I was passing out!! So... I'm just plucking my chin daily and praying that the hair on my head stops falling out!! I've also had a BIG acne problem now. I never had a single blemish all through my teen years, and now all of a sudden I have really bad breakouts all along my chin/jawline, behind my ears, on my scalp and around my mouth. Nothing above the nose-line. Funny thing is... ALL my hormone levels are coming back completely normal.

    So... in addition to trying to control my curls, I have to look for products that don't irritate the breakouts!

    It does get frustrating and feels like there is never an end... but don't give up!!! You're NOT alone... and all the things you are doing are FANTASTIC changes! Keep up the great job!! I really hope that you find things that work for you and help you feel better about how you look as well as just FEEL better!!
    comic-p.jpg
  • SunshineGrrlSunshineGrrl Registered Users Posts: 3,823 Curl Neophyte
    Does anybody else carry a pair of tweezers in their purse, stash one in their car, makeup kit, parents house, work desk, etc. because they randomly find stray hairs that bug them all day/night long if they don't tackle them head-on? *Raises her hand and jumps up and down*

    And if you don't tweeze for a day or two you suddenly sprout a Shaggy-esque goat?

    I know how you girls feel. Me and my sis have been diagnosed with PCOS (PCOD to my understanding is the same thing, you say potato...so forth). Luckily, I can pluck and be okay. My sis? She has to shave. Daily. And develops a 5 o'clock shadow. Thank goodness for small favors!

    Keep plugging at it. There are ups and downs. Remember, even with hairs on the chin and acne and weight...beautiful is beautiful. And we are.

    Another thought. Weight gain, depression and insomnia along with muscle pain, fatigue and some other symptoms thrown in are also symptoms of fibromyalgia another hard to diagnose illness. Lucky me, I have both. You might want to check out symptoms and see if you match up with some of them. Studies are starting to see if the two are linked somehow.

    Also, my hormone levels are always normal. So are my blood sugar levels. They aren't the be all for diagnosis. I'm just a freak (freak-case, too!) for random diagnoses. Sorry, another wordy post.

  • mixed_beauty85mixed_beauty85 Registered Users Posts: 421
    i have been meaning to carry an extra tweezer with me but i keep forgetting, i mainly tweeze at home. as painful as this sounds, i might just have to resort to getting my upper lip and chin waxed so i wont have to tweeze like every other day.
  • kaymoorekaymoore Registered Users Posts: 298
    Your sister should try threading it lasts a lot longer, but it hurts
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  • nynaeve77nynaeve77 Registered Users Posts: 7,135 Curl Novice
    I can't live without my tweezers. I get these three stray chin hairs that drive me crazy!

    I started doing the South Beach diet, and since I've started, I've had two periods in a row. I even could tell I ovulated this month (got the nice cramping that I used to get when I was on fertility meds)! I've lost 8 pounds and I'm pretty happy. I'd like to lose a lot more, but it's certainly a start.
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  • slinky1slinky1 Banned Banned Users Posts: 1,612
    I have PCOS also, and it has been difficult on an emotional level...so I feel your pain.

    When you say you carry tweezers around, are you plucking the blonde fuzz, or darker hairs?
  • SunshineGrrlSunshineGrrl Registered Users Posts: 3,823 Curl Neophyte
    slinky1 wrote: »
    I have PCOS also, and it has been difficult on an emotional level...so I feel your pain.

    When you say you carry tweezers around, are you plucking the blonde fuzz, or darker hairs?

    The thick, coarse blond hairs and the dark hairs, too. You know the blond ones I'm talking about, the ones you can feel, but can't see so it takes you 20 minutes to finally "get" it!

    The blond fuzz that isn't prickly, I use a trimmer on because they tend to grow long, so I just keep them trimmed rather than shaving it and it prevents me from turning into my sister who has to shave daily.

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