I love my 3 year old/ I hate my 3 year old

cosmicflycosmicfly Posts: 1,814Registered Users
Well, obviously I don't hate her. And she has become such a big girl lately, and she's lots of fun- I remember her brother being so much fun at this age. We can go places together, and she's really verbal and expressive and funny, and she has fantastic ideas. But she's been having these huge 3 year old tantrums. She throws herself on the floor and screams and kicks. Last night she carried on so much that Max came into the room frantic because he thought she was hurt and nobody was helping her.
Drama queen.
But I love her anyway.
(Just had to rant- if I say anything to my toxic mother, she will claim that she is tantrumming because I don't spank her, therefore my children are undisciplined. But that's an entirely different topic).

Comments

  • CurlieGlamourGirlieCurlieGlamourGirlie Posts: 1,198Registered Users
    How cute that Max came running to her rescue?
    3b (I think!)
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  • spiderlashes5000spiderlashes5000 Posts: 17,898Registered Users Curl Virtuoso
    Do we have the same child? I love mine to death but she is stressing me the hell out! Mine recently got kicked out of her daycare center for not listening and throwing tantrums, etc.

    Mine wants to be a big girl. And I don't think anyone (not me, not DH, not the teachers at daycare) was letting her be one. Now I'm changing my approach. I've been experimenting with different things...and already it's improving.

    She'd been talking about Jell-o ever since I was in the hospital with the new baby. So I finally just gave in, drove everyone to the supermarkert, let her find the Jell-o section, let her pick out the flavor, let her make it entirely from start to finish (other than pouring the boiling water), let her pick out the bowl to set it in and let her dish it up for everyone...and she's thrilled. So I praised her a lot for doing such a good job and am bribing her with the possibility for making more Jell-o next week. It's working really well. I'm trying to figure out little things like this that I can do.

    The bad behavior means something. We just need to figure out what...

    Good luck, though!

  • KaiaKaia Posts: 8,815Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Do we have the same child? I love mine to death but she is stressing me the hell out! Mine recently got kicked out of her daycare center for not listening and throwing tantrums, etc.


    Are you serious? :shock: I would think a daycare center would be used to and equipped to deal with a 3 year-old's tantrums. Isn't it pretty normal for children to go through a defiant stage at this age?
    *Poster formerly known as Bailey422*

    Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. ~ George Carlin
  • spiderlashes5000spiderlashes5000 Posts: 17,898Registered Users Curl Virtuoso
    Bailey422 wrote: »
    Do we have the same child? I love mine to death but she is stressing me the hell out! Mine recently got kicked out of her daycare center for not listening and throwing tantrums, etc.


    Are you serious? :shock: I would think a daycare center would be used to and equipped to deal with a 3 year-old's tantrums. Isn't it pretty normal for children to go through a defiant stage at this age?

    You would think! And mine never cussed or hit/bit/stabbed/kicked anyone, either. She just didn't want to take naps and sometimes she didn't want to do the activity the group was doing. It's a PITA to them I'm sure because they can't supervise each kid doing something different. But yeah, I would have thought they had a way of compelling the child back into the activity or staving off the tantrum. I do...and I never went to school for this.

    (Well, I have my work cut out for me!)

  • geekygeeky Posts: 4,995Registered Users
    Bailey422 wrote: »
    Do we have the same child? I love mine to death but she is stressing me the hell out! Mine recently got kicked out of her daycare center for not listening and throwing tantrums, etc.


    Are you serious? :shock: I would think a daycare center would be used to and equipped to deal with a 3 year-old's tantrums. Isn't it pretty normal for children to go through a defiant stage at this age?

    You would think! And mine never cussed or hit/bit/stabbed/kicked anyone, either. She just didn't want to take naps and sometimes she didn't want to do the activity the group was doing. It's a PITA to them I'm sure because they can't supervise each kid doing something different. But yeah, I would have thought they had a way of compelling the child back into the activity or staving off the tantrum. I do...and I never went to school for this.

    (Well, I have my work cut out for me!)

    That stinks. That is totally normal 3-year old behavior.
    We're dealing with the same stuff here. Amazing how he can go from wanting to be a big boy to wanting to be a big boy in 3 seconds. either he is having a meltdown because I turned off the light and HE wanted to do it or he is having a meltdown because he wants me to feed him his dinner.
    To Trenell, MizKerri and geeky:
    I pray none of you ever has to live in a communist state.

    Geeky is my hero. She's the true badass. The badass who doesn't even need to be a badass. There aren't enough O's in cool to describe her.
  • cosmicflycosmicfly Posts: 1,814Registered Users
    Spiderlashes, that's awful about the daycare. That is completely normal 3 year old behavior. And you would think that the daycare would be a bit more willing to work with a child with a new sibling.

    Ack! I've been really lucky with daycares, though.

    It was so cute that Max came running to her rescue, although he basically accused me of harming her, so I was a little irritated at first. After he came to check on her, though, she was so mean to him. She had undressed herself and was cold, Max was good enough to bring me some pajamas, and she was positively nasty to him about it, even after I pointed out how he was worried about her crying so loud and he brought her warm clothes.

    I'm sure the behavior is tied to her newfound independence- she was very babyish (to me, anyway) as a 2 year old. It must be a real struggle for her to realize her independence from me. I'm glad she's doing this now though, instead of in May. I'm still pretty worried about how she'll react to the newborn, though.

    Geez, this seems like such a rambling post.
  • WileE-DeadWileE-Dead Banned Posts: 24,963Banned Users Curl Neophyte
    Ramble away...perfectly understandable!
    which is why I'm stopping at one...lol
    
    0004.gif

    Ever since the sports thread wars I have sensed a special connection between [edit] & Wile. Like the connection oil has to water. I almost can't speak of it. Wait....my eyes are misting. ~asq
    Let’s just stay together and tell the world to kiss our ass. ~P


  • cosmicflycosmicfly Posts: 1,814Registered Users
    Ramble away...perfectly understandable!
    which is why I'm stopping at one...lol
    


    Yeah, rub it in... :laughing6:
  • medussamedussa Posts: 12,993Registered Users
    I can totally relate. When Catherine doesn't get her way, it's like someone is trying to kill her. And that high-pitched whiny cry of hers just grates. But I love her to pieces. Just yesterday we were waiting for Matthew at camp and she turns to me and says, "mom, you're my best friend, give me a kiss." She does it several times a day, for no reason at all. I love it.

    I have to watch her, though. She's totally imitating her big brother. So she's got a 3 year-old body with the attitude of an 8 year-old.
  • cosmicflycosmicfly Posts: 1,814Registered Users
    It's almost like Maya starts crying really hard, then she remembers she needs to amp it up, so she turns on that awful high pitched whiny cry.
    But yeah, she also says, "I love you mom, you my best friend" at random times throughout the day. So I guess that more than compensates.

    Maya's big brother will be 7 in 2 weeks, so she also has some fierce 7 year old attitude and mannerisms. Some of the things she says, Max never would have thought of at 3. Fortunately, most of her friends are also younger sibs, so while her behavior may be inappropriate, it is not shocking or exceptional in her circle.
  • MunchyMunchy Posts: 5,206Registered Users Curl Novice
    medussa wrote: »
    I have to watch her, though. She's totally imitating her big brother. So she's got a 3 year-old body with the attitude of an 8 year-old.

    This is SD to a T! She hangs out with her cousins - one her age, the other is 8 and is "a bad boy" she (and everyone else has said). I swear it drives me crazy when she gets the little attitude and says, "well [my cousin] says that" or "in mommy's house..."

    I want to scream!
  • shellibeanshellibean Posts: 4,500Registered Users
    Obviously I have no advice- I just peeked in to soak up some wisdom from everyone w/ older kiddos. I just have to say how cute it is that Spiderlashes's kid was so impressed at Jello! I LOVE IT! ADORABLE!
    A closed mind is a wonderful thing to lose.

    "...you could have a turd on your head and no one would notice."~Subbrock

    "I had an imaginary puppy, but my grandpa ate him."~Bailey
  • MagooMagoo Posts: 2,173Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I'm finding the 3's to be more of a challenge than the 2's so I can totally relate. It's definitely a struggle for independence everyday. Somedays it's literally like living with a teenager!:tongue5:
    3b/c fine, thick, porous, protein sensitive
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  • SystemSystem Posts: 39,060 Administrator
    Ramble away...perfectly understandable!
    which is why I'm stopping at one...lol
    

    Yep. That's why I stopped with one.

    Speckla
  • Oregano  (formerly babywavy)Oregano (formerly babywavy) Posts: 5,297Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    2 was MUCH MUCH worse than 3 for Bailey. She did those tantrums for not being able to do things herself at 2 - so I know what you're going through.

    Now she just follows me around talking to me NON STOP and wanting to be involved in everything I do.

    I've been a SAHM for the past 4 years, w/ an almost nonexistent social life, and a busy, working husband.

    I am ready to move to Las Vegas and change my name to Kiki.
    ~ the artist formerly known as babywavy ~

    Please excuse any typos. For the time being, we are blaming it on my computer.
  • shellibeanshellibean Posts: 4,500Registered Users
    LOL @ BW, I mean KiKi... ;) I feel ya! I've never wanted to go out so bad in my LIFE. I can. not. wait. to move closer to my mom so I can get a night away every now & then!
    A closed mind is a wonderful thing to lose.

    "...you could have a turd on your head and no one would notice."~Subbrock

    "I had an imaginary puppy, but my grandpa ate him."~Bailey

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