everyday is a bad hair day- i need advice!!

sandi_xosandi_xo Registered Users Posts: 10
Hii, I'm new to the site and could use some advice.

I'm 15 years old with a bit of a self esteem problem. Part of the problem is,I HATE my hair.

When I was younger, i didn't have a mom around to play with my hair or anything. i just left it as it was, a frizzy,wavy mess. Its naturally dirty blonde but i have played around with the color so many times ! Right now it is about shoulder length, black and i have side bangs.

I straighten my hair EVERYDAY- i know this is really hard on my hair, i can tell! i have a lot of split ends but i HATE my wavy hair so much. i envy all the girls in my class with perfectly straight, shiny hair.

lately I have been thinking of bleaching it a light blonde color- the black makes me look pale and sickly. However, i am really scared that if i bleach it, and continue to flat iron it every day, it will all break off.

I talked to a hair stylist about getting permanent straightening done, she said it would cost about $230 for me. my mom has offered to mail the $230 to me, but i had decided to use the money to buy a professional hair straightener and dye my hair blonde. tough decision because i dont want to damage my hair any more than i have... but i want it to look hot.
i want to invest in a good kind of shampoo and conditioner for dyed, damaged hair- i was thinking of TIGI Bedhead dumb blonde, my hairstylist used it on my hair and it worked great

i would soooo love to have perfectly straight hair and never have to look in the mirror at my frizzy afro hair and cry- but i don't know whether it would actually give me the results i want. there are some women who look REALLY awesome with wavy hair, but i dont really think it looks good on me.

Any advice or opinions would be REALLY appreciated ! :bounce:


  • AmandacurlsAmandacurls Registered Users Posts: 6,252 Curl Neophyte
    Have you read Lorraine Massey's "Curly Girl" book? If not I would urge you to read it ASAP. It will teach you how to take care of your curls, so that they look good, instead of a mess. Please try this first, or look up some of the methods the girls on here use (I'm sure anyone would tell you what they do with their hair if you ask). Since you already have color-treated your hair a great deal, there is a good chance it would be super damaged and break off if you get it chemically straightened. Much more of a chance if you do bleach it super blonde. When I was in college I was getting my hair bleached blonde and asked my stylist if she could chemically straighten it (this is my pre-CG phase). She absolutely refused, she said she wouldn't do that to anyone's hair, no matter how much she could make off of it. I would also advise you to look up salons in your area, there is a list on this website, and see if any of them have any stylists that specialize in the cut and care of curly hair. I know it seems like your hair is your enemy, trust me I've been there, I straightened my hair all through high school and it was always the bane of my existence. I would advise trying to work with it, rather than working against it first. After a couple months if you still would rather straighten your hair, that is your decision. If you do get it done though, you will have to get touchups, as any new growth would be curly.

    Hope this helps! :wink:
  • AmandacurlsAmandacurls Registered Users Posts: 6,252 Curl Neophyte

    Read this thread and try this method. It really does work. You can modify it if need be, some of us have to, but it'll be taking a step towards healthier hair.

    ETA: Here is the link to searching for curl specializing salons.

  • sandi_xosandi_xo Registered Users Posts: 10
    thanks for the advice!!

    i will have to try the "no poo" method, i usually wash and condition my hair every night otherwise it gets oily, but i could give it a try

    i have stopped using my blow dryer, to minimize the damage i am doing...

    the problem is, my hair is so short and choppy that if i leave it unstraightened, it looks awful, its all sticking out on the sides and lumpy in the back. its wavy, but straight at the top

    this is what i look like now, with my hair straightened. my hair is actually all different lengths if you cant tell.


    and i dont have any pictures of me with curly hair. but back when it was blonde and long enough that the waves were weighed down, it looked sorta like this :


    so i guess the best choice would be for me to let my hair grow out, and stop straightening my poor damaged hair! thanks to this site, i am now realizing how stupid it was for me to try and be something im not ( a straight haired girl...) now i have a whole head of split ends! :(
  • PrettyPorcupinePrettyPorcupine Registered Users Posts: 258
    Grow your hair! It's so pretty long!!! You have beach hair, the kind they use in advertisements for hair products -- it looks gorgeous! I like the half-bleached look, too, it adds to the beach-y effect.

    Don't think your short hair looks bad, either, actually. And keep in mind that light or blond hair shows damage way more than dark hair does -- so you may want to reconsider dyeing it blonde if it's as damaged as you say. Also, bleach is not kind to hair!!

    But your hair is so pretty, if my curls looked like that I wouldn't touch them.

    Modified CG. You'll pry my 'cones from my cold dead fingers! Mixed waves, coarse, below shoulder length, dark brown. I hate my hair :evil: but I'm trying to learn to accept it.

    Gels: LA Looks Wet Look Styling Gel, Garnier Fructis Wet Shine Gel. Condish: Alberto V05 Free Me Fresia, Tresemme' Flawless Curls, LVPNG, Neutrogena Triple Moisture. Shampoo: Tresemme' Flawless Curls. Silicone Serum: Whatever is on sale, but I don't leave home without it.
  • mailgirlmailgirl Registered Users Posts: 451
    I really like your hair!
    When I was in High School I hated my hair! I couldn't wear it like everyone else... "feathered" back at the sides (this was the late 70s and early 80s). It made me sooo upset! I, too, hated my hair.
    I think you should ask around and get a REALLY good hairstylist that knows what they are doing... although your hair does look good you said you wanted a change and they will be able to help you.
    Good luck! I know it is hard when you do not like your hair.
    Now, I do like it but some days I get mad at it! :wink:

    May the hair gods shine on me (and you!).

    My silly veggie blog: vegefattien

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