CurlTalk

Why won't you sleep

picklesgirlpicklesgirl Posts: 1,955Registered Users
That seems to be the question I ask Quentin everynight lately. He goes to bed really well. Last night he was asleep by 8:30pm then woke up around midnight. But then he takes these short little cat naps the rest of the night. However if I put him in bed with me he sleeps so good but I'm not willing to start cosleeping(y'all know how I feel about cosleeping if it works for you great but I don't want to start it) Any thoughts on what I can do to help him sleep longer?? My last son I gave cereal to in his bottle before bed but I've been doing some research on it and had I known then what I know now I may have not done it. Tonight I'm going to put him in warmer pajamas he's a kicker and everytime I check on him he's kicked off any light blankey I've put on him....
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Comments

  • DarkAngelDarkAngel Posts: 2,671Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    He might not be ready to sleep through the night. If that's the case, nothing you can do will help.

    I didn't co-sleep but once I realized that Xander would sleep longer when sleeping with me, I seized that opportunity. Usually after his 4am feed, he and I would snuggle on the couch and sleep until I was ready to wake up. Or if he slept through and woke up when my husband was leaving to go to work, my husband would bring X to me and we would snuggle for a few hours.

    Are you swaddling? Xander was a twitcher who would wake himself up with all of his jerky movements.
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  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Posts: 31,258Registered Users
    8:30 is a bit early for a 2 month old to go down for the night. Try moving his bedtime later. I think that's where a lot of parents make mistakes with babies...they put them to bed for the night too early and expect them to sleep through the night. A 2 month old just isn't capable of sleeping from 8:30pm til 6am. That's too many hours for them to go without food.

    At 2 months old, the longest length of sleep is probably around 6-8 hours. Ideally, that 6 hours should be when you sleep your 6-8 hours at night. So, if you want baby to sleep til 6am, you'll need to put him down somewhere between 10pm and midnight. The "catnaps" you mention would be better placed in the early evening, or early morning hours. It's really up to you to shape when your baby sleeps. He already is doing exactly what is right for 2 month olds...he's just doing it at the wrong times for your comfort.

    After he has his 10pm to 12am bedtime routine established, then you can gradually start moving it to earlier in the evening as he gets older. By 6-10 months old, he might be sleeping from 8:30 through the night.
  • Oregano  (formerly babywavy)Oregano (formerly babywavy) Posts: 5,297Registered Users
    Bella just started sleeping "through the night". This means she is up for her last feeding at aroung midnight, and she sleeps til about 7am. That is a LONG time for a 2 month old - especially a breastfed one.

    2 months is a little early to start a schedule, so I'm not sure how you'd have him "to bed" by 8:30. Bella's usually up and down at different times, she may just be waking up from a nap and eating at that time.
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  • SystemSystem Posts: 39,059 Administrator
    Footed pajamas was my savior. Unfortunately I didn't figure it out until he was 3 months old.
  • cymprenicympreni Posts: 9,609Registered Users
    With my boys I tried to put them down around 8ish, but I always gave them feedings on schedule until I went to bed, 1 or 2 feedings usually, depending on their age at the time, and whether I breast fed or bottle, but they always got a feeding right before I went to bed, it help out a ton.

    2 months is barely old enough for sleeping all the way through the night, I think average age is 6 weeks if memory serves, so he's not really behind or anything. Some babies just take longer, and if he's going through a growth spurt which happens around that age I think then it might another cause.
  • DarkAngelDarkAngel Posts: 2,671Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I forgot one thing that helped. We cluster fed closer to bedtime. Instead of feeding him on his usual every 4 hour schedule, we would feed him a regular feed and then another within two hours and another within another two hours if he was still awake. He was pretty greedy. It seemed to make a difference.
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    "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -- Theodor Seuss Geisel
  • picklesgirlpicklesgirl Posts: 1,955Registered Users
    8:30 is a bit early for a 2 month old to go down for the night. Try moving his bedtime later. I think that's where a lot of parents make mistakes with babies...they put them to bed for the night too early and expect them to sleep through the night. A 2 month old just isn't capable of sleeping from 8:30pm til 6am. That's too many hours for them to go without food.

    At 2 months old, the longest length of sleep is probably around 6-8 hours. Ideally, that 6 hours should be when you sleep your 6-8 hours at night. So, if you want baby to sleep til 6am, you'll need to put him down somewhere between 10pm and midnight. The "catnaps" you mention would be better placed in the early evening, or early morning hours. It's really up to you to shape when your baby sleeps. He already is doing exactly what is right for 2 month olds...he's just doing it at the wrong times for your comfort.

    After he has his 10pm to 12am bedtime routine established, then you can gradually start moving it to earlier in the evening as he gets older. By 6-10 months old, he might be sleeping from 8:30 through the night.

    I don't in anyway expect him to sleep clear through to 6am that would be far too much for me to ask. I just don't understand how he was such a good sleeper before now all the sudden we are up constantly.
  • picklesgirlpicklesgirl Posts: 1,955Registered Users
    babywavy wrote:
    Bella just started sleeping "through the night". This means she is up for her last feeding at aroung midnight, and she sleeps til about 7am. That is a LONG time for a 2 month old - especially a breastfed one.

    2 months is a little early to start a schedule, so I'm not sure how you'd have him "to bed" by 8:30. Bella's usually up and down at different times, she may just be waking up from a nap and eating at that time.

    I am a routine freak I had him started on his routine at like 2 weeks I just time his feeding so that it works out that way. I breast mostly during the day he gets a bottle here and there just depending on what he needs and then he gets his bed time bottle around 8:15 or so then he's down between 8:30 and 9:00

    And he sleeps fine for the first part of the night it's just once he's been up that first time it's (or atleast seems like) we're up and down all night
  • medussamedussa Posts: 12,993Registered Users
    Am I the only one here breastfeeding on demand? Would a schedule help my daughter with sleeping better? And perhaps be less clingy during the day?

    It sounds like many of you follow schedules as well as set bedtimes. My baby is usually asleep on me or in a sling, until I go up to bed (she sleeps with me). If I try to put her down in the bassinet or my bed, she wakes up. I think she needs to feel me or smell me to sleep. All my kids were this way. :sad3:
  • geekygeeky Posts: 4,995Registered Users
    medussa wrote:
    Am I the only one here breastfeeding on demand? Would a schedule help my daughter with sleeping better? And perhaps be less clingy during the day?

    It sounds like many of you follow schedules as well as set bedtimes. My baby is usually asleep on me or in a sling, until I go up to bed (she sleeps with me). If I try to put her down in the bassinet or my bed, she wakes up. I think she needs to feel me or smell me to sleep. All my kids were this way. :sad3:

    How old is your daughter? Like a month or so? That is way too early for schedules. Keep breastfeeding on demand.
    When Ben was tiny I also had him in my arms or a sling till I went to bed. Then I put him down in a cosleeper right next to the bed. Sometimes it took a bunch of rocking and patting for him to go to sleep. After a couple of months he was going right back to sleep after waking up to nurse in the night. He moved into his own room at around 6 months, though he kept nursing once at night.
    If you are happy with cosleeping, keep doing it. If you are not, try the bassinette right next to the bed so she can still smell you and you can pat her. Then you can try gradually moving it a foot or two away from the bed if you want.
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  • SystemSystem Posts: 39,059 Administrator
    I breastfeed on demand. Except, of course, when I'm at work.
    I have no interest in scheduling him.
  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Posts: 31,258Registered Users
    8:30 is a bit early for a 2 month old to go down for the night. Try moving his bedtime later. I think that's where a lot of parents make mistakes with babies...they put them to bed for the night too early and expect them to sleep through the night. A 2 month old just isn't capable of sleeping from 8:30pm til 6am. That's too many hours for them to go without food.

    At 2 months old, the longest length of sleep is probably around 6-8 hours. Ideally, that 6 hours should be when you sleep your 6-8 hours at night. So, if you want baby to sleep til 6am, you'll need to put him down somewhere between 10pm and midnight. The "catnaps" you mention would be better placed in the early evening, or early morning hours. It's really up to you to shape when your baby sleeps. He already is doing exactly what is right for 2 month olds...he's just doing it at the wrong times for your comfort.

    After he has his 10pm to 12am bedtime routine established, then you can gradually start moving it to earlier in the evening as he gets older. By 6-10 months old, he might be sleeping from 8:30 through the night.

    I don't in anyway expect him to sleep clear through to 6am that would be far too much for me to ask. I just don't understand how he was such a good sleeper before now all the sudden we are up constantly.



    But 2 month old babies CAN sleep through til 6am, IF they are put down to bed for the final time around midnight. Mine all did that. I was really anal about sleep and started from birth trying to get my newborns' longest-period-of-sleep to coincide with mine. By a few weeks old, I had all of them sleeping "through the night". After I got the sleep at the right time of day, I started stretching it out by putting them to bed earlier, a tiny bit at a time.
  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Posts: 31,258Registered Users
    How old is your daughter? Like a month or so? That is way too early for schedules.



    The key to schedules is to start them early and shape them gradually. No, you can't take a newborn or 1 month old and say they're going to eat every 4 hours and sleep through the night and actually expect them to do it. But, you can have a reasonable schedule in mind at the beginning and work towards that goal from early on. If you just let baby set the schedule and wait til baby is 6 or 12 months old and expect to impose a rigid schedule then, that's going to fail as well.
  • medussamedussa Posts: 12,993Registered Users
    My baby is awake and alert for very short periods of time. Then she starts to cry to be "put to sleep." I nurse her or pat her back to put her to sleep. She can't fall asleep on her own, it seems. All this to say, I can't put her to bed at midnight because she falls asleep way earlier than that (around 9pm).
  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Posts: 31,258Registered Users
    medussa wrote:
    My baby is awake and alert for very short periods of time. Then she starts to cry to be "put to sleep." I nurse her or pat her back to put her to sleep. She can't fall asleep on her own, it seems. All this to say, I can't put her to bed at midnight because she falls asleep way earlier than that (around 9pm).


    I'd wake her up at midnight to give her one more feeding before I went to bed myself. That's how I mostly worked my "schedule"...I'd wake them up every 3 hours for feeding except during that midnight-to-6am timeframe that I like to sleep.
  • Oregano  (formerly babywavy)Oregano (formerly babywavy) Posts: 5,297Registered Users
    I feed on demand. My husband says "when in doubt, whip 'em out"

    If she wakes in the middle of the night, I feed her. I don't mind if she is clingy right now.
    ~ the artist formerly known as babywavy ~

    Please excuse any typos. For the time being, we are blaming it on my computer.
  • Oregano  (formerly babywavy)Oregano (formerly babywavy) Posts: 5,297Registered Users
    medussa wrote:
    My baby is awake and alert for very short periods of time. Then she starts to cry to be "put to sleep." I nurse her or pat her back to put her to sleep. She can't fall asleep on her own, it seems. All this to say, I can't put her to bed at midnight because she falls asleep way earlier than that (around 9pm).


    I'd wake her up at midnight to give her one more feeding before I went to bed myself. That's how I mostly worked my "schedule"...I'd wake them up every 3 hours for feeding except during that midnight-to-6am timeframe that I like to sleep.

    That's pretty much what I do now. My husband gets home from work late, so I try to wait up for him. I'm up til like 11:30 or 12, and I make sure I feed her right before I go to sleep. If I go to sleep earlier than that, I know she'll wake me up to eat.
    ~ the artist formerly known as babywavy ~

    Please excuse any typos. For the time being, we are blaming it on my computer.
  • picklesgirlpicklesgirl Posts: 1,955Registered Users
    8:30 is a bit early for a 2 month old to go down for the night. Try moving his bedtime later. I think that's where a lot of parents make mistakes with babies...they put them to bed for the night too early and expect them to sleep through the night. A 2 month old just isn't capable of sleeping from 8:30pm til 6am. That's too many hours for them to go without food.

    At 2 months old, the longest length of sleep is probably around 6-8 hours. Ideally, that 6 hours should be when you sleep your 6-8 hours at night. So, if you want baby to sleep til 6am, you'll need to put him down somewhere between 10pm and midnight. The "catnaps" you mention would be better placed in the early evening, or early morning hours. It's really up to you to shape when your baby sleeps. He already is doing exactly what is right for 2 month olds...he's just doing it at the wrong times for your comfort.

    After he has his 10pm to 12am bedtime routine established, then you can gradually start moving it to earlier in the evening as he gets older. By 6-10 months old, he might be sleeping from 8:30 through the night.

    I don't in anyway expect him to sleep clear through to 6am that would be far too much for me to ask. I just don't understand how he was such a good sleeper before now all the sudden we are up constantly.



    But 2 month old babies CAN sleep through til 6am, IF they are put down to bed for the final time around midnight. Mine all did that. I was really anal about sleep and started from birth trying to get my newborns' longest-period-of-sleep to coincide with mine. By a few weeks old, I had all of them sleeping "through the night". After I got the sleep at the right time of day, I started stretching it out by putting them to bed earlier, a tiny bit at a time.

    I don't even stay up until midnight though I go to bed around 10 and for me I need that hour of me time (or us time depending on hubby's schedule that week) You know I need that hour where I can do what I want without having either of the kids awake so that I can just have me time. But I see what your saying I acually don't want him in bed untilm9pm but I can tell when he's getting tired so I always just fix that bedtime bottle around 8:15 or 8:30.
  • picklesgirlpicklesgirl Posts: 1,955Registered Users
    medussa wrote:
    My baby is awake and alert for very short periods of time. Then she starts to cry to be "put to sleep." I nurse her or pat her back to put her to sleep. She can't fall asleep on her own, it seems. All this to say, I can't put her to bed at midnight because she falls asleep way earlier than that (around 9pm).


    I'd wake her up at midnight to give her one more feeding before I went to bed myself. That's how I mostly worked my "schedule"...I'd wake them up every 3 hours for feeding except during that midnight-to-6am timeframe that I like to sleep.

    Maybe I'll try this and wake him up closer to when I'm going to bed and see what happens. Although with my luck he will end up being wide awake and then not want to go back to sleep..
  • medussamedussa Posts: 12,993Registered Users
    babywavy wrote:
    My husband says "when in doubt, whip 'em out"
    :lol:
  • geminigemini Posts: 3,325Registered Users
    I breastfeed on demand. Except, of course, when I'm at work.
    I have no interest in scheduling him.

    When I was still BFing, the same went for me. When they are that small, they really do need to eat pretty frequently (esp. if milk is the only source of food!). My daughter didn't sleep through the night consistently until she was about 7 mos. old. I have heard/read that that is about average for most babies (by then they have a stomach big enough to sustain them until morning).
  • mad scientistmad scientist Posts: 3,530Registered Users
    DS breastfed on demand. He wasn't the least bit amenable to any kind of scheduling or dreamfeeding or convenience feeding before we went out... nothing. He wanted to nurse when he wanted to nurse, no matter how inconvenient for the timing!

    I'm more inclined to give a scheduling a shot with the next one. Not "real" scheduling, but what RCW is talking about - a feed before I go to bed so I'm not being woken up 30 minutes later (DS was the master of this) or a feed before going out. That kind of thing.
  • sarah42sarah42 Posts: 4,034Registered Users
    I started trying to get into a schedule when DS was about two months old. It wasn't rigid, just more of a loose routine of eating, playing, then napping/sleeping. I had to go back to work when he was 10 weeks old, and I wanted some guidelines for my husband, who watched him most of the time during the day, and he would have otherwise been e-mailing me all the time with questions. :hiding:

    I never woke up DS for a feeding at 10 or 12 p.m. or whatever. I had a huge fear that he would be wide awake and wouldn't go back to sleep, which was probably silly on my part. However, I heartily agree with cluster feeding in the evening so that they're as full as possible when they go to sleep.
    ehLB.jpg
  • curly_keltiecurly_keltie Posts: 791Registered Users
    I breastfed on demand and he also slept in our bedroom (we were in a one bedroom apartment) so DS never really slept through the night. Now that we are in a two bedroom, he finally sleeps through the night. Would DS have slept through the night earlier had we been in the two bedroom from the time he was born? Perhaps!

    My friend's little girl is two-weeks older, and she got her into a good bedtime routine of going to bed at 8 pm. Then she would breastfeed her at midnight - they would both wake up at 8 am.

    I guess every baby is different.
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  • picklesgirlpicklesgirl Posts: 1,955Registered Users
    well last night I put him in footed pajamas nothing to hot but a light weight kind and he went to bed at 8:30 and slept until 3:30 :wav: then he went back to sleep sometime between 4:00 and 4:30 and slept until 6:30 :thumbright: then we snuggled and nursed until around 7:15 when we got up. Hopefully he'll do the same tonight.
  • SystemSystem Posts: 39,059 Administrator
    Neener neener. Told ya so!!!!! :hello1:

    There's something majic in those footies.
  • AmnerisAmneris Posts: 15,117Registered Users
    medussa wrote:
    Am I the only one here breastfeeding on demand? Would a schedule help my daughter with sleeping better? And perhaps be less clingy during the day?

    It sounds like many of you follow schedules as well as set bedtimes. My baby is usually asleep on me or in a sling, until I go up to bed (she sleeps with me). If I try to put her down in the bassinet or my bed, she wakes up. I think she needs to feel me or smell me to sleep. All my kids were this way. :sad3:

    Nope - I am too ... just about every 2 hours round the clock. No schedule here.
    Get used to me. Black, confident, cocky; my name, not yours; my religion, not yours; my goals, my own; get used to me. -Muhammad Ali


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  • AmnerisAmneris Posts: 15,117Registered Users
    Neener neener. Told ya so!!!!! :hello1:

    There's something majic in those footies.

    Unfortunately, they don't work for me because that's all he ever wears to bed and he was still not sleepimg well.... but he does LOVE music, and also French radio (voices speaking French as opposed to English seems to make a difference ??????) so that's helped a bit. He also likes some light on - total darkness makes him holler!
    Get used to me. Black, confident, cocky; my name, not yours; my religion, not yours; my goals, my own; get used to me. -Muhammad Ali


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    534Pm5.png





  • picklesgirlpicklesgirl Posts: 1,955Registered Users
    Amneris wrote:
    Neener neener. Told ya so!!!!! :hello1:

    There's something majic in those footies.

    Unfortunately, they don't work for me because that's all he ever wears to bed and he was still not sleepimg well.... but he does LOVE music, and also French radio (voices speaking French as opposed to English seems to make a difference ??????) so that's helped a bit. He also likes some light on - total darkness makes him holler!

    Have you seen the icrib it's these little speakers that hook on to the crib and you put your ipod in it so then you can make a playlist for baby at sleep time to sooth them oh and it has a night light. We haven't tried ours yet
  • inheritedcurlsinheritedcurls Posts: 2,954Registered Users
    Neener neener. Told ya so!!!!! :hello1:

    There's something majic in those footies.

    Okay, I'll put this theory to a true test. :laughing9:

    As soon as I find some footed pj's that will fit Chas... He's still waking up once in the middle of the night...the only thing that will get him back down is a bottle...
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