Dumped...advice??

texascurlytexascurly Registered Users Posts: 1,967 Curl Connoisseur
I posted earlier this week that I was dumped a few days ago via email by a (I use this term loosely) "man" who is 45 years old...believe it or not.

Anyway, I had decided (and still think) that the classiest, most mature thing I can do is NOT respond at all to his chicken s%%t email. I am however really fighting the urge to send him an email and tell him what a coward I think he truly is, etc, etc... You can imagine all of the things I'd like to say to him.

Just looking for a bit of reinforcement that NOT responding is the best way to go?!?!?

Thanks so much... I had to come and post so as to not send him an email... I feel like such a loser right now. :(

Comments

  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    He's probably on pins and needles waiting for your reply. I bet it will be a month or so before he relaxes. Just that thought should keep you from replying.
  • WileE-DeadWileE-Dead Banned Banned Users Posts: 24,963 Curl Neophyte
    yes, yes, yes!!! do not respond...
    I know how you feel...it is hard for me not to speak my mind on things...lol
    (((hugs)))
  • Gemini13Gemini13 Registered Users Posts: 5,000
    sdcurly wrote:
    He's probably on pins and needles waiting for your reply. I bet it will be a month or so before he relaxes. Just that thought should keep you from replying.

    Ooooohhhh, yes... think of the little weasel squirming.

    What a CREEP! :x
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  • JoyForeverJoyForever Registered Users Posts: 1,628
    This suggestions has been made before on the board. If you really feel the urge to tell him off, write out a letter to him saying everything you want to, and then DON'T send it. You can get it out of your system without doing anything you might regret.
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  • sarasarasarasara Registered Users Posts: 1,561
    I'm sorry about your break-up :(

    And DON'T respond.
    When you are completely over him you'll be glad you didn't.
  • spring1onuspring1onu Registered Users Posts: 16,528 Curl Connoisseur
    Make the craphead bastad squirm.. don't write him a word!
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  • Aries_jbAries_jb Registered Users Posts: 1,556
    Leave him hanging! Leave him wondering what you're thinking. I mean, doesn't it give you a little satisfaction to know that his imagination is running wild right now?: Is she thinking about me? Is she upset? Does she even care? Is she not answering because she's mad or because she's not bothered by it at all? Did she not get the email?

    Sorry, I think I'm living a little vicariously through you right now. I can't tell you how many times I wish I had just kept my mouth shut when it came to my exes :oops: .
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  • afrosheenqueenafrosheenqueen Registered Users Posts: 5,400 Curl Connoisseur
    Joy4ever wrote:
    This suggestions has been made before on the board. If you really feel the urge to tell him off, write out a letter to him saying everything you want to, and then DON'T send it. You can get it out of your system without doing anything you might regret.

    Co-sign. Don't send him an email. He's probably mad that you haven't called and cussed him out yet.

    Blast his name on Dontdatehimgirl.com instead.
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  • spiderlashes5000spiderlashes5000 Registered Users Posts: 17,898 Curl Virtuoso
    If someone is dumped (by email or whatever) and doesn't respond, it could suggest that maybe the person who was dumped was left dumbstruck, heartbroken, humilated, etc. by the dumping. And some people wouldn't want to give their dumper the feeling of having had that much power over them.

    Also, giving the guy the benefit of the doubt, he actually could be upset about having to break up. Or he may not have known any better how to end the relationship...or he might have been too scared to do it in person. And he might actually be feeling pretty badly over the way you could have taken it (if he doesn't hear a response).

    If either of these might apply, I don't think there would be anything at all wrong with responding to the email something like: "I understand. Thanks for letting me know. Take care."

    I'm not saying you should or you shouldn't. But I personally think a brief response can be very dignified and mature...even if he doesn't deserve it.

    But under no circumstances would I email him back and go off, cuss him out, insult him, mock him, say vindictive things, etc. That is really immature.

    Sorry this happened. :(
  • eccentric_kurlzeccentric_kurlz Registered Users Posts: 4,151 Curl Connoisseur
    In my case, I made sure I had the last word. We had a 'formal' breakup, but decided to stay friends and were fine(as far as I knew). Then he decides that we can't do that(that I it wouldn't be fair to me), and gives a final goodbye via email 3 days later. I could have written a letter to myself to get everything off of my chest, but for me, it was important that he knew exactly what I thought of the whole situation.

    I had the closure that I needed, and I'm fine now as a result. Absolutely no regrets

    Do what you feel is best for you. If you feel like responding would give him too much power over your emotions, then don't respond. If you believe that getting closure involves saying your piece and being done with it, then do it. At the end of the day, you have to do what's best for you.

    Good luck.
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  • SuburbanbushbabeSuburbanbushbabe Registered Users Posts: 15,402 Curl Neophyte
    I agree, do what feels right to you. Definitely write it, whether you send it or just delete it.
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  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Registered Users Posts: 31,259 Curl Connoisseur
    I think I would email him something short and flippish, like "OK...it wasn't working anyway, thanks for being a coward and using email", send it, and then block him from ever sending you anything ever again.

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