What should she do? Opinions

spiderlashes5000spiderlashes5000 Registered Users Posts: 17,898 Curl Virtuoso
So my daughter is turning 10 and i'm having a bday party for her at a bowling and video arcade place. Most of the kids going will be from her school and most will know each other. But she also wants to invite these fraternal twin sisters who she's friends with who are 1.5 yrs older and go to a different school. The twins are African American and dark skinned but one twin has a very advanced, very profound case of vitiligo. Her face is about 60% snow white, mainly around both eyes and her mouth, but with splotches everywhere. She has the most visually shocking case of vitiligo I have ever seen bc her pattern is more symmetric than normal and it looks like she's wearing make up. I mean, it really takes a minute to realize she's not wearing a mask. I'm worried about the twins feeling excluded bc they don't know anyone, and esp the one w/ vitiligo bc of her condition. I told my daughter she has to make sure she includes them, etc., but I know she's going to get too caught up in the party to be thinking about it the whole time. Do you think she should tell everyone from her school who's attending the party about this girl ahead of time and warn them not to act funny around her? Or is that too much? Little girls can be such jerks at that age. :angry3:


  • JosephineJosephine Registered Users Posts: 14,408 Curl Connoisseur
    Yikes, I have no experience in this don't know what kids are like but my gut would say no, don't tell the kids anything in advance.
  • curlypearlcurlypearl Registered Users Posts: 12,231 Curl Connoisseur
    I also have zero experience in anything like this, but I agree with Josephine.
    2/c Coarse hair med. density.
    Highly porous. Color over grey.
    I love all the Curl Junkie products. Still experimenting with gels and curl creams. Still hoping for 2nd day hair....
    Every day is a gift :flower:
  • CurlyCanadianCurlyCanadian Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Posts: 10,904 Curl Connoisseur
    I wouldn't tell them I advance that gives them time to think about it.

    Because they're older, maybe they could hand out tickets, or head up teams or something. Giving them an important role is a way to introduce them, and hopefully have the others look up to them a bit. Maybe put your daughter on the team of the girl you're more concerned about.
    I believe in manicures. I believe in overdressing. I believe in primping at leisure and wearing lipstick. I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.
    Audrey Hepburn
  • PerriPPerriP Registered Users Posts: 6,613 Curl Neophyte
    i would not tell anything in advance
    I would make sure that your daughter knows how to address things - like if someone says "ewww, what's wrong with her face??" like help her with replies on hand so that it's not a "thing"

    I think that this girl has probably experienced her fair share of comments/questions/etc and is probably going to knock your socks off with how well she does. The twins know if they are comfortable enough in this environment. Also, you could do as suggested above and give them jobs, have your daughter introduce them right away "i know most of us know each other, but these two girls here, they're like family to me - we've known each other for such a long time, i'm so glad they could come and celebrate with us!!"
    Modified CG since Dec 2011
  • jeepcurlygurljeepcurlygurl Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Posts: 20,729 Curl Virtuoso
    I wouldn't tell anyone anything. I wouldn't treat them any differently than anyone else. I would make sure your daughter introduces them to the other kids since they go to a different school. And that's it. No more involvement.
    --I'm located in Western PA.   --I found NC in late 2004, CG since February 2005, joined the forums in May 2005, started going grey in late 2005.   --My hair is 3B with some 3A, currently at mid back length when dry,  texture-medium/fine, porosity-top is low, middle is medium, ends are porous, elasticity-normal.   --My long time favorite products are Suave & VO5 conditioners, LA Looks Sport Gel, coconut oil, honey, vinegar.   
    --My CG and grey hair progress -  
    --My article at NaturallyCurly about going grey - 
  • claudine191claudine191 Registered Users Posts: 8,221 Curl Connoisseur
    I guess I would worry about that one kid who just always says something surprising.......that's the child I'd make a point of alerting, probably via her parents.

    I don't know, though. I'm sometimes amazed at how cool and accepting kids can be, or how awful.

    I really like the idea of putting both girls in positions of minor authority.

    This probably wasn't helpful. Sorry.
  • Fifi.GFifi.G Registered Users Posts: 15,490 Curl Neophyte
    There is an incredibly beautiful woman named Chantelle Brown-Young on ANTM this season who has vitiligo. It's stunning, as in remarkable, and she has the most wonderful patterns.


    She has brought a bit of attention to the condition lately so perhaps some of the kids will already be aware. I agree with those who say they would not mention anything before hand and I would not worry. I am sure she is well versed in the negative comments of some and can handle herself. If not, adults will be there to step in and educate others on the beauty in differences.
    When I hear terms like "hipster" I think, who told cliques they could leave high school??

  • Fifi.GFifi.G Registered Users Posts: 15,490 Curl Neophyte
    I know kids will be kids and even some really good ones will have their moments, break down and bully-make fun of people. CBY has talked about that on ANTM but I honestly have no idea how anyone could make fun of that. Shes like a hand painted work of art, imo.
    When I hear terms like "hipster" I think, who told cliques they could leave high school??

  • scrillsscrills Registered Users Posts: 6,700
    ANTM popped up on my HULU with weekend and I watched it. I was just coming in to say what Fifi already said

Leave a Comment

BoldItalicStrikethroughOrdered listUnordered list
Align leftAlign centerAlign rightToggle HTML viewToggle full pageToggle lights
Drop image/file