My 50 something immature brother made idiotic comments about my hair

koolkurlkoolkurl Posts: 252Registered Users Curl Neophyte
He said, "how do you comb your hair with all those curls and how do you make it look that way? " My 11 year old nephew came to my defense and said, "duh you are not supposed to comb curly hair." Then my brother said, you like it that way???!!" I can't help but feel insulted by my brothers latter comment. even though he is clueless and balding! Who is he to comment on my hair?! I just needed to vent...sometimes in my family it is hard to be a curly...Does anyone here relate?

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  • sheilacurlsheilacurl Posts: 1,240Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    In my opinion, he's angry and insecure about the fact that he is balding and is going to take it out on everyone else around him. It's his (teeny) tiny attempt to make him feel better about himself.
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  • RimiRimi Posts: 2,001Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    koolkurl wrote: »
    He said, "how do you comb your hair with all those curls and how do you make it look that way? " My 11 year old nephew came to my defense and said, "duh you are not supposed to comb curly hair." Then my brother said, you like it that way???!!" I can't help but feel insulted by my brothers latter comment. even though he is clueless and balding! Who is he to comment on my hair?! I just needed to vent...sometimes in my family it is hard to be a curly...Does anyone here relate?

    Some people just don't know how to behave. Next time he asks you something asinine, just say "why don't you ask [nephew's name]" and walk away. If he says something rude, I'd just say, "no one asked you", then walk away.

    Keep it short and snarky.
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  • koolkurlkoolkurl Posts: 252Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I think my brother is worse than usual because he lost his job years ago and now he lost almost all of his consulting work.When he is not distracted with an activity to numb his depression he seems to take it out on me. It is still not right to make me his punching bag for his painful feelings. AND he really doesn't know how to behave...
  • claudine191claudine191 Posts: 8,221Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    I tend to get emotional around my brother, so now I leave when he acts up. I'd like to hit him with a glove, but it seems such things aren't done anymore.

    Act u ally, he almost always drives me nuts, so you have my sympathy.
  • PerriPPerriP Posts: 6,613Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I tend to get emotional around my brother, so now I leave when he acts up. I'd like to hit him with a glove, but it seems such things aren't done anymore.

    Act u ally, he almost always drives me nuts, so you have my sympathy.

    This is very similar to my experience.

    If I had a dollar for every time my brother said something mean, insensitive, stupid, obnoxious, etc. I'd be a very rich woman. He is exceptionally good at picking at any sensitive spot I might have.
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  • claudine191claudine191 Posts: 8,221Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Sometimes I wonder if brothers get along best with other brothers, rather than their sisters. I know boys have battles, but are they as outright mean to each other as they are to us?

    OTOH, I might've tormented a younger brother myself, had I had one. But I like to think I'd have grown out of it by age 50.
  • chupiechupie Posts: 5,280Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    koolkurl wrote: »
    He said, "how do you comb your hair with all those curls and how do you make it look that way? " My 11 year old nephew came to my defense and said, "duh you are not supposed to comb curly hair." Then my brother said, you like it that way???!!" I can't help but feel insulted by my brothers latter comment. even though he is clueless and balding! Who is he to comment on my hair?! I just needed to vent...sometimes in my family it is hard to be a curly...Does anyone here relate?

    Pretty sure there is some jealousy driving that. Hey, good on your nephew!
    2a medium porous, You can see my wavy tutorials here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLy8bclCLgER5N_uVYSYZNxhBHSXAW40OQ and my wavy blog is The Wavy Nation http://wavynation.wordpress.com
  • chupiechupie Posts: 5,280Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    koolkurl wrote: »
    I think my brother is worse than usual because he lost his job years ago and now he lost almost all of his consulting work.When he is not distracted with an activity to numb his depression he seems to take it out on me. It is still not right to make me his punching bag for his painful feelings. AND he really doesn't know how to behave...

    It is certainly not right and very immature. Though even in my family, especially under stress, I see my siblings revert to behavior from childhood. It's worse at the familial home. It's like the environment automatically switches on the 13 year old gene.
    2a medium porous, You can see my wavy tutorials here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLy8bclCLgER5N_uVYSYZNxhBHSXAW40OQ and my wavy blog is The Wavy Nation http://wavynation.wordpress.com
  • chupiechupie Posts: 5,280Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    PS, I'd just say "Gosh, why are you so mean? That was really uncalled for." and walk off or go do something with nevvie. He'll get the point.
    2a medium porous, You can see my wavy tutorials here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLy8bclCLgER5N_uVYSYZNxhBHSXAW40OQ and my wavy blog is The Wavy Nation http://wavynation.wordpress.com
  • BluebloodBlueblood Posts: 1,748Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    Sometimes I wonder if brothers get along best with other brothers, rather than their sisters. I know boys have battles, but are they as outright mean to each other as they are to us?
    .

    Men ignore each other if don't like each other.

    Well this is according to the men I've worked with and a couple of male friends' who have a brother they don't get on with. They tend to stay out of each others way, and if they have to talk to each other say as little as possible.
  • BluebloodBlueblood Posts: 1,748Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    chupie wrote: »
    PS, I'd just say "Gosh, why are you so mean? That was really uncalled for." and walk off or go do something with nevvie. He'll get the point.

    If they are like the *&^$s I know they will respond before you walk away with "I'm only asking because I care about you".

    I use to say to my sister (who doesn't speak to me now) "That's not up for discussion".

    Siblings who attempt to pick on you start with your hair, weight and then progress to other things they think will bother you. When that doesn't work then you may end up with the silent treatment from them.

    If they don't think ignoring you is enough they will ignore anyone who ends up being with you at social events that you know i.e. friends', children, partner.

    Unfortunately for the women I know whose brothers have done this they don't realise lots of people are aware such sibling behave and it's them, the brother, who looks like an immature bullying a**.

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