CurlTalk

How does your mom feel about YOUR natural hair?

Warning! most of these are pretty funny and you're a monster if you laugh at me! lol

Mom's various reactions when I first told her I wanted to go natural in 2012, right before senior year in high school.
1. Your head is too big.

2. You have bad hair.

3. We just aren't naturally pretty. referring to her and I.

4. You can go natural after I get my prom pictures. Right now you're getting a perm.

5. I just prefer the sleek and classy look.

and my all time favorite is, 6. You don't have hair like best friend. My best friend is biracial.

When I became fully natural in June 2013 to present
1. Motherland!

2. Kizzy!

3. Whatchu gonna do with your hair? Me~ ...It is done...

4. You ain't goin' nowhere with me looking like that!

5. You need to comb it!

6. Stop washing it so much! Dirt make Black hair grow!

7. All your daddy's kids got his good hair but you. Me~ but, but, awww

8. Runs her fingers in my head and says Woo!! Me~ Ack! Don't do that! Frizz!!


So share your moms' reactions to your natural hair! Did she love it? Hate it? Or indifferent?
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Comments

  • Cassie1978Cassie1978 Posts: 9Registered Users
    My mom loved my natural hair when I BC 4 years ago, her response was I always knew you had "good hair" LOL
    I have my BC video on my youtube channel CassieAfricanQueen
    I'm a natural hair product junkie!LOL. I love trying new products.
    3c, 4a hair type
    Low porosity hair
    Subscribe to me on youtube @ CassieAfricanQueen


    www.youtube.com/CassieAfricanQueen
  • XhexaniaXhexania Posts: 65Registered Users
    My mother's reaction has been much the same. She hates my hair. LOL. She once said that I don't have the type of hair for natural hair. What does that even mean?
    Fine Strands, High Density, (Seemingly) Normal Porosity
  • AngelaE8654AngelaE8654 Posts: 1,099Banned Users
    Wow. It's sad when your mom doesn't like your natural hair. :( My own mom loves my curls and my color. My family has never said negative things about anybody's curly hair, even though most of them have stick straight hair naturally.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    I'm definitely a "curly" 2c. Sometimes curly and sometimes just wavy upper layer with a ringlety under layer. My hair has been thick and coarse since birth. Strawberry blonde in color that can and does change depending on the type and amount of light.


    All in all, I'm happy with my hair type but almost for sure think yours is prettier. :)
  • samandalovesamandalove Posts: 38Registered Users
    My mom LOVES my hair. However, my step mom says things like:

    Why don't you straighten your hair?
    Your hair looks dead. (and I always reply "ALL HAIR IS DEAD")
    It's not shiny. (I stopped dying it dark, which did create a shine to it)

    Annoying.
    Type: 3a/3b
    Hair length: Hip length.
    Products: GVP Conditioning Balm, Kinky Curly Knot Today, Curly Hair Solutions Curl Keeper, Biosilk Rock Hard Gelee, Kinky Curly Custard, Jojoba Oil
  • EntropyEntropy Posts: 67Registered Users
    Guess I'm lucky.. my mum always loved my natural hair and couldn't understand why I'd want to straighten it all the time.
    I genuinely don't understand the deal with societies apparant dislike of natural black women's hair... why???
    For a start, afro hair looks completely and utterly awesome.. and curly, crazy hair just looks so wild and sexy.. Why is straight hair so glorified? When it's something that ANYONE can have? Gorgeous big curls on the other hand are almost impossible to achieve if you have straight hair.
    Have you seen people like Beyonce with their natural hair? :o :o It's absolutely stunning!! I think it's sad when I see her with it straightened and dyed almost blonde.. such a shame!
    Rant over... :)
  • BluebloodBlueblood Posts: 1,748Registered Users
    @Entropy it's about racism.

    Lots of styles Black people can easily wear use to be, and in some cases still are, unacceptable to White employers. So lots of Black people internalised this.
  • BelleBohemienneBelleBohemienne Posts: 375Registered Users
    That's very true. It originated during the slave trade. When Africans were sold into slavery and brought to America, a part of surviving was to look as white as possible which meant straightening and relaxing the hair. It sort of evolved from there. I think everyone should watch the documentaries: Good Hair by Chris Rock and Dark Girls. These will give you the idea that in Black culture looking white has always been preferred. It's very upsetting since I firmly believe that we need to accept who we are inside and out. Black people have a very rich culture no matter where they are from: Jamaica, Haiti, Africa, and many others that should not be allowed to die out because some people within that culture are too afraid to embrace it.
    ~Belle Bohemienne

    "If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present." -Lao Tzu
  • EntropyEntropy Posts: 67Registered Users
    I know it's racist, which is why I don't understand it..
    But also, why aren't more black celebrities etc embracing their hair?? It's almost like a nod to racism :\
  • curlicious13curlicious13 Posts: 1,632Registered Users
    My mom was not happy when I told her that I was not going to continue straighten my hair. Granny still wants to press my hair. Now my mom is transitioning to natural hair. My mom is an 8 year breast cancer survivor. After having chemo, her hair is wavy. When straight, her hair looks like a white person's hair. But like most black women she prefer's straight hair. She says it looks better. That was last year. Now she's owning her hair and accepting mine.
  • KaZenner1990KaZenner1990 Posts: 859Registered Users
    My mom's biggest issue with my hair is that I don't shampoo. Also she didn't believe I had root curl and she doesn't like the slick way I style my hair. Volume is her thing even.if it is frizzy.

    {Stats for mobiles}
    M/C, High Porosity,Normal Elast. 2c/3a Boticelli/Corkicelli
    2C/3A Botticelli/Corkicelli.Growing out color/heat damage
    M/C, Low/Medium/High Por, Normal Elast. Medium Density
    LP: INSIGHT DAMAGED HAIR Restructurizing Shampoo
    CO: Generic protein conditioner, Hair Academy Deep Cleansing CO
    DET/RO/LI: GNC Avocado And Shea Butter Conditioner +/mask,
    Styler: Schwarzkopf Taft Fixing GelWellaflex Instant Volume Boost Mousse
    DT: EVOO, C.O
    HG
    Goal: WL when curly
    CG since Feb 2014
  • deloris22deloris22 Posts: 50Registered Users
    I had stick straight hair until I hit puberty and it frizzed out! A friend convinced me to let her put gel in it one day and poof I realized I had curly hair NOT frizzy!! My mom was convinced I permed it. I'm not how she feels but I like it curly and straight. Spouse prefers it curly.

    Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using CurlTalk App
    New to the CG Method.
    Shampoo: SM Moisture Retention Shampoo
    Conditioner: SM Restorative Conditioner
    Styler: FSG, SM Coconut & Hibiscus Curl & Style Milk, Olive Oil eco styler gel.
    Multiple personality curls on my head!
  • KrullenbolKrullenbol Posts: 114Registered Users
    My mom was mad at me for relaxing my hair, I think she almost told me three years in a row everyday to stop relaxing it, lol
  • BelleBohemienneBelleBohemienne Posts: 375Registered Users
    Entropy wrote: »
    I know it's racist, which is why I don't understand it..
    But also, why aren't more black celebrities etc embracing their hair?? It's almost like a nod to racism :\

    A celebrity's job is to look amazing all the time. It's not just black celebrities that have straight hair or even fake hair. I suppose you've heard of Cher, yeah? Her natural hair is still as long as it was in the 70s. She wears wigs. It's just easier.

    Besides, we shouldn't be looking to celebs for acceptance. We should accept ourselves. The world will follow.
    ~Belle Bohemienne

    "If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present." -Lao Tzu
  • BelleBohemienneBelleBohemienne Posts: 375Registered Users
    My mom's biggest issue with my hair is that I don't shampoo. Also she didn't believe I had root curl and she doesn't like the slick way I style my hair. Volume is her thing even.if it is frizzy.

    My mom always wants to blow my hair out. If I don't use a flat iron it'll poof and frizz. She grew up when it was beautiful to have Farrah hair and hates to have her hair curly. She's such a product junkie too! If it promises shiney, straight, and smooth hair she buys it, uses it twice, and puts it on a shelf. She doesn't believe me when I tell her I only use conditioner to wash and 2 products to curl!
    ~Belle Bohemienne

    "If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present." -Lao Tzu
  • ReservechicReservechic Posts: 798Registered Users
    My mother actually has been wearing her hair naturally curly for years. I was the one who told her that she didn't need to wear her hair straight anymore. Her hair is naturally beautiful in its curly state, so i told her that i felt that she looked better to me with curly hair than straight hair anyways. So, she listened to me. And, she stopped getting her hair straightened. Now, she only gets her hair dyed, which i do (as i am her own personal hairdresser). Plus, my grandmother(her mother) wore her hair natural her whole life along with her mother before her. My great grandmother had very fine textured, practically straight hair. Her her hair grew to be well below waist length. My mother's mother had very fine textured, wavy hair. Her hair actually grew to being floorlength. However, she would only wear here hair down only a few times a year. Instead, she would mainly keep her hair in a bun. And, my mother has a mix of both fine and medium textured curly hair. Her hair has always been below shoulderlength ever since i have known her.

    Also, my aunts and uncles on my mother's side all were born with naturally curly hair as well. They just had curl types and hair textures. So, naturally curly hair really has always dominated in my family. My mother has had absolutely nothing negative to say when i stopped relaxing my hair. My family is accepting of my curls and i really haven't experienced any negativity because of it.
    Diagnosed with Scalp Eczema 6/2015
    (Don't hair type/loose curl pattern/fine texture/low density/high porosity

    Current Regimen (Ayurvedic Based):
    Cleansers- Bobeam Shampoo Bars
    Stylers-Rotate between Camille Rose Naturals Almond Jai Twisting Butter and Camille Rose Naturals Aloe Whipped Butter Gel

    I only wear my hair in wash n gos or buns. Also,
    I do not use conditioner on my hair on a weekly basis. And, my hair is A ok with that!
  • KaZenner1990KaZenner1990 Posts: 859Registered Users
    My mom's biggest issue with my hair is that I don't shampoo. Also she didn't believe I had root curl and she doesn't like the slick way I style my hair. Volume is her thing even.if it is frizzy.

    My mom always wants to blow my hair out. If I don't use a flat iron

    She doesn't mind the curl she minds the lack of volume. The lion mane volume. Herself has very fine hair that lose volume rather easy so she kinda try to inherit me with her hair issues. My hair doesn't react like hers. Mine go fluffy and poofy as days pass with just flat roots but lately(from when I found a good routine) my roots when my wash day is dew they fuss and become staticy instead of oily. Who knows why?


    {Stats for mobiles}
    M/C, High Porosity,Normal Elast. 2c/3a Boticelli/Corkicelli
    2C/3A Botticelli/Corkicelli.Growing out color/heat damage
    M/C, Low/Medium/High Por, Normal Elast. Medium Density
    LP: INSIGHT DAMAGED HAIR Restructurizing Shampoo
    CO: Generic protein conditioner, Hair Academy Deep Cleansing CO
    DET/RO/LI: GNC Avocado And Shea Butter Conditioner +/mask,
    Styler: Schwarzkopf Taft Fixing GelWellaflex Instant Volume Boost Mousse
    DT: EVOO, C.O
    HG
    Goal: WL when curly
    CG since Feb 2014
  • Morgan_AdcockMorgan_Adcock Posts: 2,573Registered Users
    My mother's favourites:

    Don't you want to brush your hair before we go out?

    I have a blowdryer you can use.

    What did you do, comb your hair with a MixMaster?
    Peace,
    Morgan

    Baby Fine 3B, low porosity, normal density and elasticity
    CGing since July 2008
  • KaZenner1990KaZenner1990 Posts: 859Registered Users
    She.stooped saying anything about it because my hairdresser instructed me to.not brush my hair when I wear it curly. If I want I could detangle it in the shower with lots of condish.

    {Stats for mobiles}
    M/C, High Porosity,Normal Elast. 2c/3a Boticelli/Corkicelli
    2C/3A Botticelli/Corkicelli.Growing out color/heat damage
    M/C, Low/Medium/High Por, Normal Elast. Medium Density
    LP: INSIGHT DAMAGED HAIR Restructurizing Shampoo
    CO: Generic protein conditioner, Hair Academy Deep Cleansing CO
    DET/RO/LI: GNC Avocado And Shea Butter Conditioner +/mask,
    Styler: Schwarzkopf Taft Fixing GelWellaflex Instant Volume Boost Mousse
    DT: EVOO, C.O
    HG
    Goal: WL when curly
    CG since Feb 2014
  • CurlyDiva71CurlyDiva71 Posts: 130Registered Users
    I've almost always worn my hair in its natural state, except for a very brief flat iron phase in 2004. My mom also has curly hair that she never accepted or knew how to care for, so when I was a child she brushed mine, and it always looked like a big poofball.
    As a teen in the 80's, my kind of hair was in, so I just teased it really high and thought I was SO cool. lol
    In the 90's and beyond I started experimenting with a lot more products. My mom has always thought my hair was pretty, and she would always say she wouldn't fight hers if it was as pretty as mine.
    She thought it was really weird when I first went CG (not using shampoo!), but after she saw my results she changed her mind and asked me more about it, and I lent her the book, and she is finally working with her own natural hair and getting compliments!

    It makes me sad that the black people have had to endure so much racism that they've been conditioned not to like their own natural hair, which is beautiful just as it is. I'm seeing more and more wearing their hair natural, and hoping this will help. To me it is a waste to straighten naturally beautiful hair just so everyone can look the same. Not all of us have stick straight blonde hair. And it would be totally boring if we did.

    3A, a mix of boticelli, corkicelli, and a few s-waves, baby fine, naturally porous, medium/high density

    Pre-poo: coconut oil
    Co-wash: TJ's Tea Tree Tingle, Sauve Naturals, VO5, As I Am coconut co-wash
    Conditioner: TJ's Nourish, Tresseme Naturals, Sauve Naturals coconut, SM Coconut & Hibiscus
    LI: KCKT
    Styling: DevaCurl Light Defining Gel, HETT Mousse (HG's!)
    EcoStyler Krystal (new HG!!!), BRHG
    coconut oil or jojoba oil to SOTC
    Color treated with demi-permanent color to cover first grays
  • okyouwinokyouwin Posts: 157Registered Users
    Just for your info-I'm in my late 40's and my mom is almost 80...I went cg a year ago and it blew her mind when she saw my hair in it's curly state! I had stick straight hair into my early 20's so she was used to that. I had all kinds of short hair cuts and layers that I blow dried through the years and I outright fought my curl for 2 yrs before I let the curls fly. Her hair is wavy but not as curly as mine. She even called my sister across the country to tell her what was going on with my hair! :D
    Anyway-she was very interested in the cg method!
    I'm going to go ahead and say 3a
    fine/medium texture and a bit porous-I color
    Spring routine: Renpure luxurious argan oil shampoo/Loreal Advanced Care Color conditioner , HETT gel
    Microfiber towel/diffuse
    Trying KKCC
  • BotticelliBritBotticelliBrit Posts: 2,075Registered Users
    My mum loves my hair curly and always makes it a point to tell me, especially when I feel like I'm having a bad hair day. She's been really encouraging and complimentary about my new curly locks.

    Actually, all of my family are the same. They're constantly saying stuff like 'oh, your hair looks so gorgeous' and 'don't you ever straighten it again, missy!' It makes me wonder why I spent so long wrecking my hair, when both I and the people I know, all seem to prefer it curly. If only I had a time machine!
    3B. Med porosity. Med thickness. Med density.

    LP: Shea Moisture (currently JBCO)
    Conditioner/CW: Jason Aloe Vera

    LI: Aunt Jackie's Curls & Coils Quench
    Refreshing: TRESemmé Naturals Aloe Vera & Avocado
    Gel: DevaCurl Ultra Defining Gel
    DC:
    Aunt Jackie's Soft & Sassy Super Duper Softening Conditioner
    Treatments: Coconut oil/Coconut milk

    UK curly. CG since Oct 2013.
    Growing my hair to WL when dry :thumright:
  • ZoevaZoeva Posts: 20Registered Users
    She hates it. Ever since I was young she would straighten it and she even wanted to relax it. I'm glad I didn't go through with it though.

    I'm 23 now and she still keeps telling me I should straighten it or whatever, because it's "easier" that way. Or she would say that she found this shampoo that straightens the hair. She will just drop hints here and there that she does not like my hair.
  • sixelamysixelamy Posts: 4,156Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    My mom likes my hair. She has wavy hair herself, but doesn't know how to care for it so she's always worn a short style. She always goo goo gagas over my curls, but I do think she likes my hair better straight. Not gonna lie, I do think I look more attractive with straight hair, but I feel funny with it now. She's just glad I don't have to perm it like I did when I was a kid, since she's the one that had to pay for it. We both wished we would've known what I had under all that shampoo, it's a shame I had to perm it when I had it naturally.
    2c-3a - med-coarse - normal-high porosity - high density
    :bunny:
    NP/LP: CJ Daily Fix, KMF Whenever / Giovanni TTTT
    RO/LI: Aussie Moist, CJ Argan & Olive Oil, Hask Keratin Protein
    DC/PROTEIN: KC Stellar Strands / CNPF
    STYLER: CJ Curl Queen
    COLOR: henna, amla & indigo
    :thumbdown:: glycerin in high/low dews, polyquat-10 & 11, parabens
  • JessiiLeighhJessiiLeighh Posts: 195Registered Users
    My mom loves my curly hair, and supports me 100%. She pays for products even when they're expensive because she loves the way I embrace my natural texture and the way I take care of it.

    Unfortunately, she doesn't feel the same about her hair and says, "well, I like it on you, but not on me" as she rips her hair out with a brush and blowdryer. It really frustrates me, but I know it's her own choice.
    :wav:
    3a, fine/med strand thickness, high density, low porosity
    CG since April 2012
    BC October 2012
    Cleanser: SheaMoisture Manuka Honey or CJ Daily Fix
    RO Conditioner: Mop Top Daily Conditioner
    Leave In: KCKT
    Stylers: Either Raw Curls Spray Gel, Raw Curls Medium Hold Gel, or MopTop Curly Custard, and always topped with Curlisto Control II Gel
    Sealer: Pure Argan Oil
  • CurlyFangirlCurlyFangirl Posts: 5Registered Users
    My mother is amazed with how lovely my hair looks now.

    She's never been a person I could go to for hair advice, because she's always had super short hair, and it's a totally different texture to mine. She didn't hate my hair before, but she loves how it's looking now. I'm very thankful to have the type of mother who never critiqued my hair, and always let me do with it as I chose.
    CG since 06/2014
    2b/c; Fine to Medium; Normal Porosity; High Density
    Living in very hot semi-dry area.

    Clarifying: Malibu Un-Do-Goo Clarifying Shampoo
    Cleanser: DC Low Poo, As I Am Coconut Cowash
    RO&LI: DCOC, SM Tahitian Noni & Monoi, SM Coconut & Hibiscus; As I Am Leave in, KCKT
    Stylers: DC Light Defining Gel, DC Ultra Defining Gel, DC Frizz-Free Volumizing Foam, Flax Gel, Okra Gel
    DC:Shea Moisture Deep Treatment Masque, Coconut Oil
  • aspenaspen Posts: 154Registered Users
    I spent most of my childhood with my mom making fun of the huge, frizzy mess on my head. She's an ethnic 3C and somehow it never occurred to anyone that maybe I had an abused head of curly hair and not just a rat's nest of the frizziest straight hair on earth.

    I straightened my hair for at least a decade and wouldn't go anywhere without my flat iron, and whenever it got humid and my hair would start to poof up my mom would poke fun at my hair and comment on how bad it looked. We relaxed it once or twice but since my hair grows super fast it wasn't very helpful for long.

    When I went CG earlier this year it was the first time in my life I'd ever tried to embrace my curls, and now my mom is convinced I've gotten a perm and I'm faking it LOL.

    For obvious reasons I live on the opposite side of the continent of my mother, so it doesn't really bother me what she thinks about my hair anymore :D but she does think my 'perm' looks alright.
    3A-3B / Medium / High Density / Low Porosity
    Modified CG
    Low poo: Creme of Nature Argan Oil Moisture & Shine
    Conditioner: Curls Unleashed NB
    Leave in: Creme of Natura Argan Oil Strengthen & Shine
    Styling Product: Curl Keeper/ Curly Solutions gel
  • smalesevsmalesev Posts: 33Registered Users
    My mom HATES my hair! She thinks it's disgusting (her words, not mine). She's coming around though. I've had 3 compliments from her on my hair since March 15 (my bridal shower) and she didn't fight me when I said I wanted it curly for the wedding (she, of course, straightened hers). If I had to guess, I'd say she has 3A/3B curls. You can only tell when her hair is wet. She uses sulfates constantly, no product, and a boar bristle brush 6+ times a day is all she uses.
  • ReservechicReservechic Posts: 798Registered Users
    Zoeva wrote: »
    She hates it. Ever since I was young she would straighten it and she even wanted to relax it. I'm glad I didn't go through with it though.

    I'm 23 now and she still keeps telling me I should straighten it or whatever, because it's "easier" that way. Or she would say that she found this shampoo that straightens the hair. She will just drop hints here and there that she does not like my hair.

    Sorry to hear that your mother hates your wearing your hair natural. As long as you love your natural hair, then don't let any of your mom's comments towards your hair get you down. Stay strong! Maybe one day she will come around and start accepting your natural hair. But, even if she never does, just keep going on and loving and acepting your hair. :flower:
    Diagnosed with Scalp Eczema 6/2015
    (Don't hair type/loose curl pattern/fine texture/low density/high porosity

    Current Regimen (Ayurvedic Based):
    Cleansers- Bobeam Shampoo Bars
    Stylers-Rotate between Camille Rose Naturals Almond Jai Twisting Butter and Camille Rose Naturals Aloe Whipped Butter Gel

    I only wear my hair in wash n gos or buns. Also,
    I do not use conditioner on my hair on a weekly basis. And, my hair is A ok with that!
  • ReservechicReservechic Posts: 798Registered Users
    My mom loves my curly hair, and supports me 100%. She pays for products even when they're expensive because she loves the way I embrace my natural texture and the way I take care of it.

    Unfortunately, she doesn't feel the same about her hair and says, "well, I like it on you, but not on me" as she rips her hair out with a brush and blowdryer. It really frustrates me, but I know it's her own choice.

    I am thrilled to hear that your mother is so supportive of you wearing your hair curly. And, that she even buys hair products for you as well, no matter if their expensive. You are blessed to have such a supportive mom. Hopefully one day, she'll start embracing her own natural hair too. You never know......
    Diagnosed with Scalp Eczema 6/2015
    (Don't hair type/loose curl pattern/fine texture/low density/high porosity

    Current Regimen (Ayurvedic Based):
    Cleansers- Bobeam Shampoo Bars
    Stylers-Rotate between Camille Rose Naturals Almond Jai Twisting Butter and Camille Rose Naturals Aloe Whipped Butter Gel

    I only wear my hair in wash n gos or buns. Also,
    I do not use conditioner on my hair on a weekly basis. And, my hair is A ok with that!
  • potatoheadpotatohead Posts: 175Registered Users
    My mom's not a big fan of curly hair. Most of my family has wavy hair but my mom and I both have the same dry, curly hair. She has been relaxing and straightening her hair for years and had me doing the same. Since I made the decision to go natural in January she's fine with it but doesn't really take it seriously? Occasionally she'll say my hair looks nice but then every now and then she'll say I should get relaxer because of my new growth. I tried to convince her to go natural with me but she refuses.
    Oh well :tongue7:

    3B/3C
    Fine thickness, medium density, high porosity

    CG since 1/25/2014
    BC 6/25/2015
    Still figuring my hair out
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