coming off years of straightening and getting frustrated :(

mishuusmishuus Posts: 2Registered Users
Hi everyone

I'm a Type 2b (I think, as I haven't seen my natural hair for years...) with thick coarse hair (I think high porosity), which turns into a ball of frizz if blow dried and still remains frizzy when air dried (think Helena Bonham Carter and her weird hairdos...).

For at least a decade I've been straightening my hair once or twice a week after washes. I used sulfate-laden shampoos and always used elseve hair masks instead of conditioners, as regular conditioners didn't do much for my hair. I gave up on straightening my hair about 3 weeks ago, and have cut out shampoos containing sulfates. In an attempt to use more natural products I am using ACV rinses to clarify, I shampoo with SheaMoisture Coconut & Hibiscus Curl & Shine Shampoo and use SheaMoisture Restorative Conditioner, which I rinse out at the end. My hair goes all soft with the ACV and the shampoo while I'm using it, but I always feel I need to use so much of the conditioner to feel anything.

After washing I wrap my hair in a MF towel until I go to bed (I have to wash at night), then tie it up and put it in a satin bonnet.

In the morning my hair feels softish in parts, especially at the back, but it's generally a huge mess of waves and non-waves, so I need to pry it apart with my fingers and run a wide toothed comb through it - by which time it doesn't feel so soft anymore *sigh*
Once I've done that I use SheaMoisture curl enhancing smoothie or Jessicurls Oil Blend for softer hair to give more definition and especially to minimize frizz, but the result is more or less meh. Although I use both products sparingly the oil especially makes my hair just look oily, but not soft, and there clearly still is frizz.

The reason I was straightening my hair all those years was to avoid frizz :angry5: I'd love soft, shiny (but not oily) consistent waves, but at the moment my hair doesn't know if it's coming or going and I'm really struggling. - Do I need more products? Different products?
I'm attaching a photo of what my hair looks like under the top hair, this is where it seems to be less frizzy and some of my waves are coming out again. I have everything from no waves to slightly spirally waves on my head, showing up at random places, although they tend to be hidden under the frizzy more straight top hair. I also dye my hair regularly, as I went grey around the 27 year mark.
Sorry for the rant, but any help would be appreciated :(

Comments

  • SereneCurlsSereneCurls Posts: 1,145Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    Have you ever tried scrunching a gel into wet hair? The gel helps prevent frizz, and holds your waves in position while your hair dries. Once it's dry you can scrunch the hair again to get rid of any crunch from the gel.
    3a, dense, fairly coarse, normal porosity and elasticity, just below shoulder
    Low poo: Giovanni 50 50
    Co-wash: aia, suave coconut, salon care
    R O: Tresume Naturals, gvpcb
    L I: KCKT, gvpcb
    Stylers: cjpp, re : coil, kccc, brhg
    Oils: coconut, argan
    Experimenting with: curls rock amplifier, pantene mousse
  • BelleBohemienneBelleBohemienne Posts: 375Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I wash my hair at night and sleep with it in a braid. In the morning, I soak it with cool water then scrunch in my products, plop for about 45 minutes, then diffuse.
    ~Belle Bohemienne

    "If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present." -Lao Tzu
  • mishuusmishuus Posts: 2Registered Users
    Thank you for the suggestions - I haven't touched gel since high school, as it would leave my hair a hard and often flaky mess, I guess gels have come a long way since and I will revisit the idea. I have ordered a tub of of the KCCC which so many write about and will see how it works in my hair - if you have any recommendations for gels I'd be glad to hear them!

    I don't have a diffuser, doesn't it add a lot of volume? Volume is definitely not something I want for my hair, I don't want to emphasise my square, largeish face...
  • BelleBohemienneBelleBohemienne Posts: 375Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I have very fine hair and the curls can get heavy and weigh it down, so yes I get crazy volume, but gravity takes effect after a few hours and it calms down.

    Maybe you could try air drying and clipping your roots. This way you still get some volume, but not a lot.
    ~Belle Bohemienne

    "If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present." -Lao Tzu
  • chupiechupie Posts: 5,280Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Once again I have to recommend at least trying flax seed gel. Make your own if you don't want to purchase on Etsy. There are vids all over youtube. It's simple and cheap and it can really be a great, simple product.
    2a medium porous, You can see my wavy tutorials here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLy8bclCLgER5N_uVYSYZNxhBHSXAW40OQ and my wavy blog is The Wavy Nation http://wavynation.wordpress.com
  • aspenaspen Posts: 154Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I wouldn't suggest combing your hair dry, when you pull apart your waves it will create frizz! If you're going to brush your hair you should do it in the shower, or gently detangle with your fingers only.
    3A-3B / Medium / High Density / Low Porosity
    Modified CG
    Low poo: Creme of Nature Argan Oil Moisture & Shine
    Conditioner: Curls Unleashed NB
    Leave in: Creme of Natura Argan Oil Strengthen & Shine
    Styling Product: Curl Keeper/ Curly Solutions gel
  • CGSince2002CGSince2002 Posts: 1,073Banned Users
    After all that time straightening your hair is in need of some DTs, especially PTs. A very popular one is IAgirl's gelatin PT, which I tried earlier tonight for the first time, here's the link to her blog page which has many other recipes too.
    Joined Curltalk 1st time in early '02 shortly after starting CG. I'm a non-practicing Cosmetologist.
    Hair: color-treated, mostly 3A.
    CO-wash: VO5 K&L
    RO: SpaHaus Salon w/OO, VO5 Shea Cashmere, W.R. Trop. Coconut, Daily Defense Moisturizing & others.
    LI: Beautiful Curls w/Shea Butter & C.O., Hollywood Beauty OO Creme, VO5 K&L, Aveda Be Curly Curl Enhancer.
    Gels: LAL Wet Look, ORS Lock & Twist.
    Oils: Jojoba, EVCO & Africa's Best Ultimate Herbal Oil

  • LickedCupcakeLickedCupcake Posts: 19Registered Users
    2nd the protein/gelatin treatment. It really does help my hair!

    I also second NOT combing your hair-- as it will create frizzies and messies.

    Curious, why do you have to wash your hair at night?
    Newly permed, super fine either 2b or 2c (haven't figured that out yet) hair with low density as well.

    Desert-dweller.

    Currently using and figuring out:
    Pre-poo: Mane & tail conditioner
    Low-poo: Burts bee's moisturing shampoo
    Wash out: Either trader joe's tea tree or Burt's Bees moisturing conditioner
    Gel: Still working on figuring it out. Right now, Pantene 24 hr or Flax seed gel.
  • FraenzyFraenzy Posts: 48Registered Users
    Dear mishuus,

    all the other curlies here gave already great tipps! And I am too, so thankful for all of that, cause I need to learn still a lot myself.

    I am also new and what I figured out is, that my hair needs a looot of conditionert, the more conditioner I use, the more I moisture my hair during the washing process (and as leave inns afterwards) the better my hair feels!
    I was so afraid in the beginning of over conditioning my hair, but I found the right conditioners and my hair is more healthy than ever before!

    I am not sure, and I hope someone can correct me If I am wrong, but to know ur porosity is also quiet helpful. I have low porosity hair, and since I found the right technique to give my hair enough moisture and than "locking it in" it helped me also to reduce frizz.

    I would also recommend gel. I love eco styler, it is cheap and very good! Also available in many different variants!
    2c/3a curls
    low porosity, medium/high density, medium width (as far as I see now ;) )
    CG since March 2014

    Still searching for the best products!

    Routine now:

    Cleanse/shampoo with YTC Nourishing Shampoo
    Cleanse with SM Yucca Baobab Conditioner/Rainforest Moisture Conditioner
    YTC Pampering Conditioner/Loreal Everpure Moisture RO or LI
    For styling I use any Eco styler gel (do not like the Argan oil that much)
    For DC I mix SM Condi+Honey+Olive Oil
  • WeathercurlWeathercurl Posts: 228Registered Users
    Curl Keeper and CKCC will dramatically reduce frizz, I found. But for me they also totally deflate my hair and I have no volume so I can't use them. Lots of curlies use these first, then top with a gel. There are lots of you tube tutorials for Curl Keeper (I never bother to find any for CKCC but I'm sure there are plenty).
    2b/2c ( weather permitting - 3a), fine texture but lots of it, colored and highlights, BSL.
    Experimenting w CG since Oct 2012

    Current rotation:
    cowash= TN
    AG Gel Mousse, LA Gel,
    DT = Coconut oil (love)
  • Morgan_AdcockMorgan_Adcock Posts: 2,573Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I wash my hair *and* apply my styler(s) at night.

    Gel has come a long way, but part of the problem you remember with it may be related to techniques. I never knew, before I started Curly Girliing, that I was supposed to scrunch out the crunchiness once my hair had dried. Nor would I have known how to do that. That's one of a myriad of things I didn't know, but learned from reading (and rereading) Lorraine Massey's book, now republished as Curly Girl: The Handbook (also available here), which now comes with very helpful video segments on a DVD included with the book. I can't recommend it highly enough.

    That said, it's quite likely that you have heat damage which will have to grow out and be cut off. Curly Girling, protein treatments, and deep treatments will help it be the best it can be, but until that part of the hair is gone, it will not look and behave the same as virgin hair will. Even though I had not been using heat styling, I could tell a difference in my hair with every haircut, but a much larger difference once the last of the pre-CG hair was cut off.
    Peace,
    Morgan

    Baby Fine 3B, low porosity, normal density and elasticity
    CGing since July 2008
  • CGSince2002CGSince2002 Posts: 1,073Banned Users
    When there's no serious damage, which can be easily seen as split ends and dull straw-like hair, CG done with the right products can actually restore hair back to health.

    That was my experience shortly after I started CG 12 years ago. I had colored hair on which I gave myself highlights with bleach (balayage) and it became very hard to detangle when I wet it, to say the least. But my first co-wash product was a cholesterol treatment that had 5 oils and detangled perfectly (then they started adding m.o. so I topped buying it), and my RO, which I soon started to use as a LI to stretch it, had wonderful herbal extracts and jojoba oil and it left my hair well-moisturized.

    I also did several DTs the first month and my hair bounced back so incredibly that I never had to use gel to keep frizz off because I just didn't have any.
    :D
    Joined Curltalk 1st time in early '02 shortly after starting CG. I'm a non-practicing Cosmetologist.
    Hair: color-treated, mostly 3A.
    CO-wash: VO5 K&L
    RO: SpaHaus Salon w/OO, VO5 Shea Cashmere, W.R. Trop. Coconut, Daily Defense Moisturizing & others.
    LI: Beautiful Curls w/Shea Butter & C.O., Hollywood Beauty OO Creme, VO5 K&L, Aveda Be Curly Curl Enhancer.
    Gels: LAL Wet Look, ORS Lock & Twist.
    Oils: Jojoba, EVCO & Africa's Best Ultimate Herbal Oil

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