I don't want to share my makeup

DedachanDedachan Posts: 1,644Registered Users Curl Neophyte
A friend who's going with me to a wedding said she wanted to go with me to a hair salon to do hair and makeup. I told her I was doing my hair and makeup myself, and she answered that she would then drop by my house earlier to get ready as well. I have a strong feeling she wants me to help her out with makeup. She hasn't explicity said she wants to use my stuff, but she doesn't really own many products and is very much in the habbit of helping herself to my things (food, for instance).

Thing is, I don't like sharing my makeup, especially lip and eye products. Just like I wouldn't share a toothbrush.

How would you handle this?
«1

Comments

  • sixelamysixelamy Posts: 4,157Registered Users Curl Novice
    I would bring up the subject again and say something like, "Don't forget to bring your own makeup!" If she has a problem with this, just be honest. Say you don't feel comfortable sharing makeup, because it's not sanitary.

    I told a friend this once at our friend's wedding. She was initially irritated, but got over it pretty quickly. She also has herpes, so I didn't want any of her bodily fluids touching my stuff. Gross.
    2c-3a - med-coarse - normal-high porosity - high density
    :bunny:
    NP/LP: CJ Daily Fix, KMF Whenever / Giovanni TTTT
    RO/LI: Aussie Moist, CJ Argan & Olive Oil, Hask Keratin Protein
    DC/PROTEIN: KC Stellar Strands / CNPF
    STYLER: CJ Curl Queen
    COLOR: henna, amla & indigo
    :thumbdown:: glycerin in high/low dews, polyquat-10 & 11, parabens
  • spiderlashes5000spiderlashes5000 Posts: 17,898Registered Users Curl Virtuoso
    I'd ask her how elaborately she's going to make herself up or what look she's going for, and tthen tell her what products she will need to BUY to achieve that look. Make some recs, if she doesn't have much experience w/ make up.

    Sharing make up is gross and totally unhygienic!

  • rizosrizos Posts: 40Registered Users
    Another idea would be to either buy or ask her to buy new applicator brushes: eye shadow brush, lip brush, foundation sponge and mascara wand. The things that you don't use an applicator for like eye liner and lip liner, you could ask her to bring her own. If the only reason for not wanting to share is sanitary reasons, this would avoid that. They don't have to be expensive tools, you should be able to find decently priced ones at a pharmacy or even Sally's. I would be honest about the sanitary issue. It doesn't have to be in an offensive way, but just state that you don't typically share make-up because of this.
    3a-3b, medium texture, medium porosity, color treated. 5 years CG

    CO-wash: Suave Naturals, Tresemme Naturals
    Rinse Out:GVP Conditioning Balm
    Leave in: KCKT
    Styler: CHS Curl Keeper, KCCC, SM Coconut Hibiscus Gel Souffle
  • DaniGirl88DaniGirl88 Posts: 1,583Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I agree with everyone so far. I'd casually ask her what kind of makeup she's bringing and what look she is going for. If she says she was planning on using yours, just tell her that you'd rather not share as a personal preference. She should have her own makeup an if she doesn't, it is high time she buys some! =)
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    3B, fine, normal porosity, high density, medium width and length
    Conditioner: Tresemme Naturals, Trader Joe's Tea Tree Tingle
    Co-Wash: As I Am Coconut Co-Wash
    Leave in Products: As I Am Leave-In, SM Smoothie/Milk, KCKT, Giovanni Direct Leave-In
    Air Dry

    Looking for new products and methods to try!



  • sixelamysixelamy Posts: 4,157Registered Users Curl Novice
    rizos wrote: »
    Another idea would be to either buy or ask her to buy new applicator brushes: eye shadow brush, lip brush, foundation sponge and mascara wand. The things that you don't use an applicator for like eye liner and lip liner, you could ask her to bring her own. If the only reason for not wanting to share is sanitary reasons, this would avoid that. They don't have to be expensive tools, you should be able to find decently priced ones at a pharmacy or even Sally's. I would be honest about the sanitary issue. It doesn't have to be in an offensive way, but just state that you don't typically share make-up because of this.

    That doesn't eliminate safety on her friend's part, since I'm sure the makeup has been used by the same brushes/applicators many times. It goes both ways, not just one way.
    2c-3a - med-coarse - normal-high porosity - high density
    :bunny:
    NP/LP: CJ Daily Fix, KMF Whenever / Giovanni TTTT
    RO/LI: Aussie Moist, CJ Argan & Olive Oil, Hask Keratin Protein
    DC/PROTEIN: KC Stellar Strands / CNPF
    STYLER: CJ Curl Queen
    COLOR: henna, amla & indigo
    :thumbdown:: glycerin in high/low dews, polyquat-10 & 11, parabens
  • spiderlashes5000spiderlashes5000 Posts: 17,898Registered Users Curl Virtuoso
    rizos wrote: »
    Another idea would be to either buy or ask her to buy new applicator brushes: eye shadow brush, lip brush, foundation sponge and mascara wand. The things that you don't use an applicator for like eye liner and lip liner, you could ask her to bring her own. If the only reason for not wanting to share is sanitary reasons, this would avoid that. They don't have to be expensive tools, you should be able to find decently priced ones at a pharmacy or even Sally's. I would be honest about the sanitary issue. It doesn't have to be in an offensive way, but just state that you don't typically share make-up because of this.

    I'm not a microbiologist or anything...but if some of the friend's eye juice or eye boogers got on the applicator and then got re-wiped into the the eyeshadow, and then Dedachan wiped her applicator over the same area of eyeshadow, cldn't Dedachan get infected? Or is there something in some make up that kills bacteria? I have heard that ppl get sties from sharing make up.

  • DedachanDedachan Posts: 1,644Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    I'm glad I'm not crazy. I did grow up with a sligthly hypochondriac mother.

    I think she would be clueless about which aplicators to get. I do have a product that is meant to sanitize brushes, so maybe I should not worry too much. Perhaps I should tell her to at least bring mascara and lipstick. As for eyeliner, she's on her own, because I don't use any and wouldn't know how to draw them on.

    The other aspect is that I have never done makeup on another person.
  • JosephineJosephine Posts: 14,408Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    I must be weird because I don't see what the big deal is. I would just tell her you don't share makeup if she asks when she's there. A friend told me the same when I wanted to borrow her lip gloss, no big deal. Around winter time, I get sick often and I don't share any drinks or food either (sometimes friends want to taste my drink).
  • Fifi.GFifi.G Posts: 15,490Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    Dedachan wrote: »
    I'm glad I'm not crazy. I did grow up with a sligthly hypochondriac mother.

    Hehe. It's not so much a hypochondriac thing. It really is a sanitary issue. Models pitch a fit when makeup artists attempt to use unclean brushes on them before runway shows or shoots because it's a wise thing to do. I'm sure a few have learned the hard way. Make up gets a good deal of ones bacteria on it from every day skin issues. Zits, etc. Problems can just increase from there.
    When I hear terms like "hipster" I think, who told cliques they could leave high school??

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • aspenaspen Posts: 154Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    Dedachan wrote: »
    I'm glad I'm not crazy. I did grow up with a sligthly hypochondriac mother.

    I think she would be clueless about which aplicators to get. I do have a product that is meant to sanitize brushes, so maybe I should not worry too much. Perhaps I should tell her to at least bring mascara and lipstick. As for eyeliner, she's on her own, because I don't use any and wouldn't know how to draw them on.

    The other aspect is that I have never done makeup on another person.

    The way MUA do multiple faces with the same makeup is by using miniature pallets and spatulas, or tossing away applicators as soon as they have been used once.Using a new applicator and double dipping pretty much undoes the purpose of using a different applicator, as the facial bacteria gets transferred right back into the makeup :(

    Even if you clean a brush, if it touches her faces and goes back into the makeup it is compromised- which is why MUA usually transfer product to a separate pallet or spatula first.

    I would tell her that you have very sensitive skin, and are very careful not to share your makeup to prevent breakouts.

    If you have never done makeup on another person I wouldn't recommend letting her bully you into doing it this time, it can be very stressful and what works for your face may not work for hers!
    3A-3B / Medium / High Density / Low Porosity
    Modified CG
    Low poo: Creme of Nature Argan Oil Moisture & Shine
    Conditioner: Curls Unleashed NB
    Leave in: Creme of Natura Argan Oil Strengthen & Shine
    Styling Product: Curl Keeper/ Curly Solutions gel
  • chupiechupie Posts: 5,280Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Offer to go shopping with her to help pick out the makeup she'd like to wear. Some people who don't have a lot don't know much about it and become overwhelmed when they go to buy makeup. If you have an Ulta or Target you can probably find her some nice affordable stuff to work with.
    2a medium porous, You can see my wavy tutorials here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLy8bclCLgER5N_uVYSYZNxhBHSXAW40OQ and my wavy blog is The Wavy Nation http://wavynation.wordpress.com
  • SpiralliSpiralli Posts: 3,683Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    I would have to say that getting ready for big events is stressful for me, and I would be most comfortable getting ready on my own.
    Location: Texas
    Type: 3b/3c (i), below shoulder length.
    CO wash: A-O GPB LYY, Desert Essence Coconut, Oribe Silverati
    Leave-ins: Curl Junkie Beauti-Curls, KCKT, cno overnight
    Styling: BRHG, MGA Sculpting Gel, A-O Mandarin Magic Gel, LOTD AVG, LALSG, CJ Pattern Pusha
    DT: Curl Junkie Deep Fix, Briogeo Don't Despair Repair!
  • CurlyCanadianCurlyCanadian Posts: 10,904Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Curl Connoisseur
    The day before, I'd tell her my eye was a little itchy and to make sure she brings her own stuff so she doesn't catch anything.
    I believe in manicures. I believe in overdressing. I believe in primping at leisure and wearing lipstick. I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.
    Audrey Hepburn
  • JosephineJosephine Posts: 14,408Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    The day before, I'd tell her my eye was a little itchy and to make sure she brings her own stuff so she doesn't catch anything.

    Okay, but isn't that kind of passive aggressive? If she thinks that's the reason then the same issue could come up again when her eye is 'not itchy'.
  • CurlyCanadianCurlyCanadian Posts: 10,904Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Curl Connoisseur
    Josephine wrote: »
    The day before, I'd tell her my eye was a little itchy and to make sure she brings her own stuff so she doesn't catch anything.

    Okay, but isn't that kind of passive aggressive? If she thinks that's the reason then the same issue could come up again when her eye is 'not itchy'.

    Totally! The only friend I can think of that would want to do that though, would be really offended if I just said I don't want to share for hygienic reasons. For me, in this case, the lie is the better option.
    I believe in manicures. I believe in overdressing. I believe in primping at leisure and wearing lipstick. I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.
    Audrey Hepburn
  • chupiechupie Posts: 5,280Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Seriously? No one thinks taking a friend out to buy her own things is a better option than lying?
    2a medium porous, You can see my wavy tutorials here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLy8bclCLgER5N_uVYSYZNxhBHSXAW40OQ and my wavy blog is The Wavy Nation http://wavynation.wordpress.com
  • JosephineJosephine Posts: 14,408Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    Yea but that requires a lot more work.
  • sixelamysixelamy Posts: 4,157Registered Users Curl Novice
    Josephine wrote: »
    The day before, I'd tell her my eye was a little itchy and to make sure she brings her own stuff so she doesn't catch anything.

    Okay, but isn't that kind of passive aggressive? If she thinks that's the reason then the same issue could come up again when her eye is 'not itchy'.

    Totally! The only friend I can think of that would want to do that though, would be really offended if I just said I don't want to share for hygienic reasons. For me, in this case, the lie is the better option.

    People aren't stupid though, they can see straight through this kind of thing. I had a friend use that excuse on another friend and it was a very transparent lie. What is so harmful about being honest and simply saying you don't like to share makeup. You don't have to explain your actions to anybody in this life. If I had a friend who got mad at me for something so trivial, I'd think it would be time to find a new friend.

    I personally wouldn't wait til the day of when she got there and then has no makeup to wear. I like chupie's idea of taking her out to find "the right colors" for her.
    2c-3a - med-coarse - normal-high porosity - high density
    :bunny:
    NP/LP: CJ Daily Fix, KMF Whenever / Giovanni TTTT
    RO/LI: Aussie Moist, CJ Argan & Olive Oil, Hask Keratin Protein
    DC/PROTEIN: KC Stellar Strands / CNPF
    STYLER: CJ Curl Queen
    COLOR: henna, amla & indigo
    :thumbdown:: glycerin in high/low dews, polyquat-10 & 11, parabens
  • CallyCally Posts: 58Registered Users
    I second the buying idea, this way the girl has her own makeup and won't need to borrow.
    Fine 2c-3a Curls
    Normal porosity/ Medium density
    Henna over color-treated hair
    Not currently CG :(
    Poo: Pureology hydrate
    RO: Pureology hydrate
    LI: HSH Tri-wheat spray
    DT: Coconut oil
    PT: Henna/Cassia
    Styler: AG recoil/mousse-gel
  • CallyCally Posts: 58Registered Users
    Besides getting the basics wouldn't be too difficult. Mascara, blush, eyeshadow quad, liner, lip gloss. Easy
    Fine 2c-3a Curls
    Normal porosity/ Medium density
    Henna over color-treated hair
    Not currently CG :(
    Poo: Pureology hydrate
    RO: Pureology hydrate
    LI: HSH Tri-wheat spray
    DT: Coconut oil
    PT: Henna/Cassia
    Styler: AG recoil/mousse-gel
  • MunchyMunchy Posts: 5,206Registered Users Curl Novice
    It's easy enough to throw it into conversation before it happens. "I don't like to share my makeup, so bring whatever you need."

    Easy peasy.
  • Ms.CabernetMs.Cabernet Posts: 137Registered Users
    Do you and her have the same skin/eye color? If you are lighter/darker than her, you can say that the foundation/eye shadow/blush tones you use would not look good on her and that she would look prettier wearing the right tones for her. Remind her also that you have never done makeup in somebody else other than yourself and if you do her make up, she might not like the results.
    I'm medium tan in foundation and literally all my friends are lighter than me, so even though I wouldn't mind sharing stuff with them, the colors I use would not look good on them. The ones with my same skin tone are my sisters and I'm ok sharing stuff with them as well.
  • CurlyCanadianCurlyCanadian Posts: 10,904Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Curl Connoisseur
    Shades of PT Cruisers are dancing in my head :lol:
    I believe in manicures. I believe in overdressing. I believe in primping at leisure and wearing lipstick. I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.
    Audrey Hepburn
  • chupiechupie Posts: 5,280Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    If it's a friend I guess I wouldn't consider makeup shopping that much work. One of my favorite things to do with a friend.
    2a medium porous, You can see my wavy tutorials here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLy8bclCLgER5N_uVYSYZNxhBHSXAW40OQ and my wavy blog is The Wavy Nation http://wavynation.wordpress.com
  • scrillsscrills Posts: 6,700Registered Users
    I get what you are saying, but should the OP really have to go out and spend money simply because her friend tends to "take liberties" with her things. Not cool.

    If she was a good friend. Ok. but it has been stated that this person just helps herself to things. and if she was easy to talk to/got the hint, the topic wouldn't have been started and we wouldn't be having this conversation
  • CurlyCanadianCurlyCanadian Posts: 10,904Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Curl Connoisseur
    Josephine wrote: »
    Yea but that requires a lot more work.

    Exactly!!!
    I believe in manicures. I believe in overdressing. I believe in primping at leisure and wearing lipstick. I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.
    Audrey Hepburn
  • CurlyCanadianCurlyCanadian Posts: 10,904Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Curl Connoisseur
    chupie wrote: »
    If it's a friend I guess I wouldn't consider makeup shopping that much work. One of my favorite things to do with a friend.

    Different strokes, that is one of the least enjoyable things I can think of to do with a friend.
    I believe in manicures. I believe in overdressing. I believe in primping at leisure and wearing lipstick. I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.
    Audrey Hepburn
  • anonymous_153995anonymous_153995 Posts: 271Banned Users
    sixelamy wrote: »
    Josephine wrote: »

    Okay, but isn't that kind of passive aggressive? If she thinks that's the reason then the same issue could come up again when her eye is 'not itchy'.

    Totally! The only friend I can think of that would want to do that though, would be really offended if I just said I don't want to share for hygienic reasons. For me, in this case, the lie is the better option.

    People aren't stupid though, they can see straight through this kind of thing. I had a friend use that excuse on another friend and it was a very transparent lie. What is so harmful about being honest and simply saying you don't like to share makeup. You don't have to explain your actions to anybody in this life. If I had a friend who got mad at me for something so trivial, I'd think it would be time to find a new friend.

    I personally wouldn't wait til the day of when she got there and then has no makeup to wear. I like chupie's idea of taking her out to find "the right colors" for her.

    Real ish! 🙌


    ✨👑Destined for Greatness👑✨
  • scrillsscrills Posts: 6,700Registered Users
    Cally wrote: »
    Besides getting the basics wouldn't be too difficult. Mascara, blush, eyeshadow quad, liner, lip gloss. Easy

    what happens if you buy her a quad and she looks over at your stuff and goes "oh, but I really like that shade or purple better. Can I use it?" or if she prefers your blush to hers or she has always wanted to try the gloss you are using?

    It becomes a slippery slope. I would just tell her that I don't share my makeup
  • anonymous_153995anonymous_153995 Posts: 271Banned Users
    My friend likes to borrow stuff of mine from clothes to shoes. and whole i dont mind lending i just would like it back sometime soon and in the condition it was b4 they got hold of it. and with this particular friend that is not usually the case. so instead of saying that to her i just showed her that its what i prefer and what i expect. When i borrow her things i give it back asap and its never broken or busted lookin. if its a top i wore the night b4 i return it after ive washed it. if its a pair of heels or a clutch i usually hand it back and the end of the night on the ride back home. i dont like to keep track of other ppls things. i dont like to hold on to them bcuz i dont want them holding on to mine. i dont like to have to ask over and over for my stuff back.

    a friend of mine in high school used to say "geez im not going to steal it" but she hardly ever gave my stuff back. it got to the point where i would tell her i didnt have what ever it was she was asking to borrow. that girl later turned out to be a very horrible person and is no longer a friend of mine and never will be.

    i think if its a true friend and they dont get the hints then they will atleast understand the english or whatever language you speak. speak up and if they dont understand then they dont understand you. but if they cant continue the friendship bcuz of this well then thats just fine too.


    ✨👑Destined for Greatness👑✨
«1

Leave a Comment

BoldItalicStrikethroughOrdered listUnordered list
Emoji
Image
Align leftAlign centerAlign rightToggle HTML viewToggle full pageToggle lights
Drop image/file