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Anti Weave Pastor

adthomasadthomas Posts: 5,525Registered Users
Texas Pastor Aamir Bans Weaves In Church | K is for Kinky


Pastor Says NO to Women Wearing WEAVES in Church | AmericaPreachers.com


First let me say I don't wear weave but I do wear wigs. I think not everyone wears "fake" hair for the same reasons. hair loss. Other people I know like to change up their look. Maybe some have self esteem issues idk.

. But I think the pastor has a valid point about why are broke people getting $300 weave? This is going to make me unpopular but if I'm the grocery store behind someone swiping an EBT card with $300 weave Im going to be like wth? I dont care if she didnt pay for the hair because whoever gave her the money for it she could have bought groceries. We have so many people with the wrong priorities and Im not just talking weaves or women. I know people who get paid, blow their money then can't pay their bills. I know someone who spends $300 a month renting furniture and she is about disabled.
Im sure some of these church folks go poor mouthing to the church for help and this preacher is sick of it. I know people who have receive thousands of dollars from tax returns, settlements, FEMA and before you can blink the money is gone and they have nothing to show for it. Employers have told me how workers tend go aWOL in January when the get their returns the show up later wanting jobs back.. As my grandma would say they ain't got a pot to piss in or one to throw it out of.
I have a friend who owns a bss and people are always trying to steal hair. Same at Sallys and salons. People risking jail for hair? Your thoughts?
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Comments

  • multicultcurlymulticultcurly Posts: 5,132Registered Users
    I believe people should be able to make their own choices about what goes on or in their bodies, but I respect what this preacher is doing. He is actually trying to help his congregation improve their lives.

    I used to live in St. Louis where there is a large poor, inner city African American population. I used to work and volunteer where I interacted with this population a lot. It always surprised me how much money women would spend on their hair - $100s, when they were on government assistance and didn't have a job or one that paid a living wage. Beauty is important, but living within your means is more important.

    A lot of poor and middle class people of all races lack common sense when it comes to money. They're always one paycheck away from losing everything. And it isn't always because they don't make enough; they spend too much on the wrong things.

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  • BluebloodBlueblood Posts: 1,748Registered Users
    It's been discussed quite often in the past year in the UK why poorer people act like this. The conclusion tends to be that if you have little money buying luxuries makes you feel better. Obviously depending on the "luxury" additional factors come into play such as presuming people with money do what you are doing and relieving boredom.

    I'm actually guilty of it as I use to relax my hair as a student once I left home, yet within 4 months of starting working in my profession I was natural which has cut down my hairdressing and hair product bills significantly.

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  • adthomasadthomas Posts: 5,525Registered Users
    Blueblood wrote: »
    It's been discussed quite often in the past year in the UK why poorer people act like this. The conclusion tends to be that if you have little money buying luxuries makes you feel better. Obviously depending on the "luxury" additional factors come into play such as presuming people with money do what you are doing and relieving boredom.

    I'm actually guilty of it as I use to relax my hair as a student once I left home, yet within 4 months of starting working in my profession I was natural which has cut down my hairdressing and hair product bills significantly.

    Sent from my Nexus 7 using Tapatalk

    That conclusion makes sense.I don't agree with it but I can see now where that mentality is coming from.
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  • BluebloodBlueblood Posts: 1,748Registered Users
    With hair it would help if more famous women did not use weaves.

    It would also help if men kept their mouths shut and didn't tell women in the media spotlight to get relaxers.

    If you were inclined to get a weave but saw the majority of women of colour in the media with their natural hair then you would be less inclined the next time to get one.
  • adthomasadthomas Posts: 5,525Registered Users
    If I was famous as in a performer I would wear a lot of wigs and weaves just to keep stylists from frying my hair. Alicia Keys says that is why she started braids was she was tired of stylists messing with it.

    You can tell me what the UK is like but my experience is the US is that it is not so much about relaxed hair as it is "good hair" ie not 4 hair. being a woman with long flowy natural hair is treated in the black community like winning the lottery. I have many cousins with loose hair and no one ever tells them they need a relaxer My avatar is my great grandmother who died before I was born but to this day my family brags about her long curly hair that all she needed was to wet it and put grease in it. They love to tell how Her father had straight hair and her mother wavy.
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  • KorkscrewKorkscrew Posts: 1,834Registered Users
    I truly think a lot of this - but not all of it - is a feminist issue. Those of us who are women understand just how much pressure there is to conform to this or that beauty standard. Not only do we have our poor black sisters spending thousands on weave, we have our poor white sisters spending thousands on plastic surgery. And I bet every ethnic group has some version of this insane story here in the US.

    We're all so unholy bombarded by impossible, air-brushed images of "perfect" people - especially women - w/their wealth, social status and relative freedom and safety; the implication that their looks bought them everything they have. We're all expected to live up to that or we feel we aren't viable. And, you know, maybe some poor people are paying for more than just hair. Maybe it fulfills some fantasy that they've arrived - they look in the mirror and feel for a moment like they've escaped their difficulties, that they could be some privileged person living in a care-free suburb. Of course it's an illogical choice to starve for that, but in the context of a crazy country, I think I get it.

    So it's a feminist issue IMO and also a specific kind of American sickness. I like that the preacher is addressing the issue.
  • BluebloodBlueblood Posts: 1,748Registered Users
    adthomas wrote: »

    You can tell me what the UK is like but my experience is the US is that it is not so much about relaxed hair as it is "good hair" ie not 4 hair. being a woman with long flowy natural hair is treated in the black community like winning the lottery. I have many cousins with loose hair and no one ever tells them they need a relaxer My avatar is my great grandmother who died before I was born but to this day my family brags about her long curly hair that all she needed was to wet it and put grease in it. They love to tell how Her father had straight hair and her mother wavy.

    Black people in the UK come from a variety of different ethnic groups, so depending on where you were born, grew up and often age natural hair is viewed differently. So attitudes vary a lot.

    Incidentally if you have a hair curl pattern, thickest etc that doesn't stereotypically fit your ethnic background you can get a lot of hassle.
  • sarahspinssarahspins Posts: 20Registered Users
    Korkscrew wrote: »
    And I bet every ethnic group has some version of this insane story here in the US.

    Even outside of ethnic groups, there are regional social classes that do equally stupid things. I have a cousin who is on several kinds of assistance that spends upwards of $200 a month on her *nails*. I can't even fathom choosing to do that when you already can't make ends meet, but it's what she has made a priority in her own life I suppose.
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  • KorkscrewKorkscrew Posts: 1,834Registered Users
    It's a good point about social class. I'm like you: I can't imagine spending money like that on nails instead of taking care of basic needs.

    Can't help wondering if a lot of us women - of any ethnic group or social class - would really care so very much about nails, hair or whatever other vanity-related issues, if we lived in total isolation for a while, with no access to the media or men with oppressive beauty ideals :happy8:
  • adthomasadthomas Posts: 5,525Registered Users
    I think it is more than feminism. I also have a cousin on assistance who spends ungodly money on hair and nails. But I know men who are just as careless in buying electronics, jewelry or rims. No lie sometimes the rims are worth more than the car. There is nothing wrong with treating yourself. I went for a pedicure today but if I didnt have money for the electric bill Ad would be buffing her feet at home.

    What I don't get is why they don't get they could live better if they put their money to better use. Poverty is more than a lack of money. How is spending hundreds on hair and nails when you can't afford it going to improve your situation? Sometimes I wonder if some people want to get out of poverty if all they do is keep digging themselves deeper holes. There are so many people who start poor and they get ahead by working hard and living frugal at least to start. But I have been told there is a generation of young people who don't expect to live long enough to get old so their attitude is YOLO.
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  • LovemenappyLovemenappy Posts: 332Registered Users
    LOL....dude's a trip! I think it's laughable that a black preacher would say anything about this matter period to be honest. Really any preacher when it comes to money. I wonder if he's thankin' bout them finanically struggling when they start playing the piano and passing that collection plate around.

    I don't think it's my or anyone else's business how a woman or man allocates their money. There is a bit of class-ism and self-righteousness from that preacher. Well actually a lot of it. The truth is that there are a PLETHORA of "more important" things people can spend money on....any LUXURY item that does not provide basic food, shelter, etc can be seen as a waste of money.....because there is ALWAYS something more "important" that money can be invested in...always. With that being said....I don't see how anyone could agree with this with a straight face. Maybe because of who it's directed to this time. I'm curious if his rant was directed at natural's who spend crazy amounts of money on hair products if the perception on his rant would flip. I only say that because judging by the blogosphere...the people that seem to agree with his rant the most are....naturals (who are anti-weave).


    PJs (Im going there too) spend thousands of dollars on hair products that they don't even use. I know people with popular hair care lines and can state for certain that the natural hair community spends probably more than the average weave wearer. At the risk of getting off topic. THIS is what I find the worse (if I were to judge). At least a weave is reusable. An 8 ounce bottle of water mixed with an emulsifier and shea butter at $16.00 a pop is not. And $300 a pop for hair products is not an anomaly. I don't check natural's pockets, but I'm quite certain that not all of them are balling like that to spend that much on hair custards and leave in conditioner. That money could certainly be put towards something "more important". But I don't care. Why? Because it's none of my business. Who am I to say or judge how much someone makes and what they can afford to purchase....and what they can purchase.

    This is why his approach is stupid. How does he know the cost of the weave for each person in his church? How does he know that someone rocking the afro right next to them didn't just spend $300 on Qhemet Biologics, KBB and the "new product line that just came out"? I understand what he's trying to do, I wont deny that black people in general spend an astronomical amount on "beauty" products and clothing, but address the issue as such. But pointing out weave and referencing his congregation as if he knows each individuals financial situation (regardless as to what he says I'm quite certain he does not) is illogical, judgmental, and ridiculous.

    If they want to live in a shack with a brand new Mercedes....that's there business. Those folks are grown, he's a jerk for thinking he is in some form of moral authority to tell them how to spend. Curious what kinda car dude drives and how much his suits costs though...

    Somebody needs to tell the preacher only God can judge them...
  • multicultcurlymulticultcurly Posts: 5,132Registered Users
    I don't know about the UK, but I know in the US that this is a class problem. Many chronically poor people have no budgeting skills or common sense when it comes to money. Many poor African American women do spend hundreds of dollars each month on their hair, money they don't have to spend. In general, Americans tend to spend above their means and don't save.

    From what I have seen, there are many churches in the inner city where poor African Americans live, but these churches don't help their congregations improve the current state of their lives. I think this pastor is trying to help. It may sound weird to us because we probably aren't the people spending our rent or car payments buying weave or adding in braids.

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  • curlylocs232curlylocs232 Posts: 143Registered Users
    I just want to say that I haven't read the article (phone won't let me) but I have read some of the comments. I'm in the UK and I really don't see much difference. In the UK, the 'good hair' concept is an issue in the black community, and so is beauty in general (not just in the black community) so ppl spend loads on it. Those who are on benefits in the UK are not, by any means, living on the bread line. They are not in 'poverty' at all. Because of taxation, it is often better for someone on benefits to stay there, as they bring in more money this way (this is a well known flaw of our system). Pls excuse my post not being so relevant to the pastor article, but I thought I'd shed some light...
  • adthomasadthomas Posts: 5,525Registered Users
    My feeling is grown folks who don't want people in their business about how they spend their money should pay their all of their own bills. I don't care if people drive a new Benz and live in a shack unless that shack is public housing or section 8 which means my taxpayers dollars are giving them a place to stay. If grown folks want me to stay out of their busness they should stay out of my pocket. The truth is a lot of people are using government, church, charity money to provide their basic necessities while they want to ball with their money. My church runs a food pantry as do many churches so churches know who are those in need. We also have social services programs at my church. I'm glad we do But to expect the church and food stamps to feed your kids while you spend hundreds getting your hair (weave or natural) and nails done? Why people want to say others are being judgmental when they call out ratchet behavior? Even Jesus called people out when they needed it. I applaud the Rev.
    I don't have a single bill that is not paid by me but if I ran into hard times and people were kind enough to help I wouldn't be so disrespectful and unappreciative as to throw my money away that way.
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  • curlylocs232curlylocs232 Posts: 143Registered Users
    adthomas wrote: »
    My feeling is grown folks who don't want people in their business about how they spend their money should pay their all of their own bills. I don't care if people drive a new Benz and live in a shack unless that shack is public housing or section 8 which means my taxpayers dollars are giving them a place to stay. If grown folks want me to stay out of their busness they should stay out of my pocket. The truth is a lot of people are using government, church, charity money to provide their basic necessities while they want to ball with their money. My church runs a food pantry as do many churches so churches know who are those in need. We also have social services programs at my church. I'm glad we do But to expect the church and food stamps to feed your kids while you spend hundreds getting your hair (weave or natural) and nails done? Why people want to say others are being judgmental when they call out ratchet behavior? Even Jesus called people out when they needed it. I applaud the Rev.
    I don't have a single bill that is not paid by me but if I ran into hard times and people were kind enough to help I wouldn't be so disrespectful and unappreciative as to throw my money away that way.

    Well said. I don't appreciate my tax money being spent to someone's hair when I have to save pennies a tub of KCCC!!
    I wish I was as eloquent as you!
  • curlylocs232curlylocs232 Posts: 143Registered Users
    Flippin' phone! *spent ON someone's hair when I have to save pennies FOR a tub of KCCC!
  • KorkscrewKorkscrew Posts: 1,834Registered Users
    adthomas wrote: »
    I think it is more than feminism.

    Which is why I started my original statement with, "I truly think a lot of this - but not all of it - is a feminist issue." ;)
    I also have a cousin on assistance who spends ungodly money on hair and nails. But I know men who are just as careless in buying electronics, jewelry or rims. No lie sometimes the rims are worth more than the car. There is nothing wrong with treating yourself. I went for a pedicure today but if I didnt have money for the electric bill Ad would be buffing her feet at home.

    Good points, and the whole thing is so frustrating.
    What I don't get is why they don't get they could live better if they put their money to better use. Poverty is more than a lack of money. How is spending hundreds on hair and nails when you can't afford it going to improve your situation? Sometimes I wonder if some people want to get out of poverty if all they do is keep digging themselves deeper holes. There are so many people who start poor and they get ahead by working hard and living frugal at least to start. But I have been told there is a generation of young people who don't expect to live long enough to get old so their attitude is YOLO.

    Seems this is where the trap of class division (sometimes coupled with racial issues), play out. I completely agree there seems to be something else besides poverty at work when it comes to someone resisting a more stable financial life. Maybe some people have been made to feel less worthy than people with more resources, social standing and (possibly) education? Maybe a classist society has done a terrific job of convincing a lot of people they can't get ahead in any meaningful, long-term way. Or that their success will be met with hostility (often it is). Maybe there's ambivalence about becoming more successful than most people in their community; how that might alienate those they care about via resentment/envy. Some people feel anxious and guilty about being more successful than their parents were, especially if it would "elevate" them to a much higher class standing (I've witnessed this one first hand, several times - like with friends ... sons/daughters of blue collar workers who are now advanced chemists or surgeons). And there are probably many other forces at work keeping a lot of people locked into a class system and financially undermining themselves, is my guess. And it's really frustrating because there are so many talented, bright people who can't or don't want to see just how powerful they really are and can be. Plus those who are of higher class standing are invested in keeping them exactly like that.
  • BluebloodBlueblood Posts: 1,748Registered Users
    Lovemenappy one of the points of religion is to give moral guidance.

    So if a pastor or any religious leader sees his/her flock spending money they cannot afford on something that is frivolous rather than an essential item, it's their job to speak up about it.
  • secret_karmasecret_karma Posts: 438Registered Users
    I'm not at all offended by his message, probably because I'm not a fan or wigs and weaves; they just make my head hot, I can't take it. I get what the pastor is trying to say, but I think his approach might be off. Telling someone who is struggling and has poor financial management skills to stop wearing weaves is a weak partial fix to their problem. According to the article, he feels their problem is financial management, so maybe having financial/budgeting classes would be helpful as opposed to telling them not to wear weave. If they stop spending $300 on weaves, that money will probably just go to some other random expense they don't need; it's not going to help them save it or spend it wisely.
  • KorkscrewKorkscrew Posts: 1,834Registered Users
    I always thought a congregation looked to its leader for different forms of moral guidance (general messaging), not financial budgeting classes.

    ... I think his general message is good except that he might have included men who spend their money frivolously too, instead of just zeroing in on the women.
  • adthomasadthomas Posts: 5,525Registered Users
    I'm not at all offended by his message, probably because I'm not a fan or wigs and weaves; they just make my head hot, I can't take it. I get what the pastor is trying to say, but I think his approach might be off. Telling someone who is struggling and has poor financial management skills to stop wearing weaves is a weak partial fix to their problem. According to the article, he feels their problem is financial management, so maybe having financial/budgeting classes would be helpful as opposed to telling them not to wear weave. If they stop spending $300 on weaves, that money will probably just go to some other random expense they don't need; it's not going to help them save it or spend it wisely.

    You are so right. He shouldn't just tell people what they are doing wrong without showing them how to do better. I know a pastor in a poor neighborhood who does that. He may not know all the answers but he is smart enough to reach out to people who do. His church as brought in experts to held seminars on financial management, homeownership, dangers of those sketchy money lenders, criminal expungements, resume building ect. He is all about teaching a man to fish. He told me today if you give a child a dollar the dollar will soon be gone but if you teach him the value on a dollar he will hold onto that for as lifetime.
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  • BluebloodBlueblood Posts: 1,748Registered Users
    The preacher needs to do both - the preaching followed by the classes.

    And yeah he needs to pick on the men as well. Then again maybe he did. Journalists and news reporters only report part of what someone says and often take it out of context.
  • KorkscrewKorkscrew Posts: 1,834Registered Users
    Yeah, that's a really good point: it's hard to know whether or not he addressed issues with the men.
  • adthomasadthomas Posts: 5,525Registered Users
    LOL! If I had known it would lead to bashing journalists I would not have started this thread. Just kidding.
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  • LovemenappyLovemenappy Posts: 332Registered Users
    Blueblood wrote: »
    Lovemenappy one of the points of religion is to give moral guidance.

    So if a pastor or any religious leader sees his/her flock spending money they cannot afford on something that is frivolous rather than an essential item, it's their job to speak up about it.

    No. It's not his job or point of authority to tell a group of people how to spend their money. He is not Jesus. He is not God. He's a random man giving a Bill Cosbyesque rant based off of his experience with someone in his congregation.

    This man is given more credit than he deserves. His rant was in regard to weaves. It didn't get any deeper than that. Banning weaves from a church does not in anyway prevent said person from spending their money frivolously. I didn't pay a dime for my last install, I'll be damned if I have someone preaching in my face about me wearing a weave and how I purchased it, when it's none of his business. What else will he ban? Shoes? Cars? What about if someone has a $20 lunch?...or the people that spend ungodly amounts *see natural hair community* on hair products? It's just stupid for him to point out weaves as if that is the culprit as to why people are not managing their money correctly....because it's not. There are a plethora of other people who spend their money recklessly and don't have a weave.

    Yet another reason why I'm not religious or a Christian.
  • BluebloodBlueblood Posts: 1,748Registered Users
    Actually Lovemenappy it is his job.

    That is part of what organised religion is for.

    Preacher and religious leaders tend to spend their time ranting about more important social issues such as poverty, certain types of abuse (while being abusers themselves) and in the past apartheid.

    And I'm not religious either.
  • KorkscrewKorkscrew Posts: 1,834Registered Users
    Maybe part of the problem here is that everyone has a different expectation of what a pastor or preacher is supposed to do or not do; who they are supposed to be.

    Like some of you, I don't see myself as religious, though I might consider myself spiritual. I'm genetically an Ashkenazi Jew (and conditioned more toward that), and my other parent is a staunch Christian. But frankly, I think ANY formal, organized religion is more or less one big Rorschach test and everyone sees what they want to see; hears what they feel like hearing and too many expect their God to be a kind of personal Santa Clause who delivers what they personally want. And then some people take it even further and expect their religious leaders to act like Santa's little elves - that their leaders should be in charge of their growth and welfare - their personal beck-and-call-boys (or girls).

    I do see that a lot of good comes from religion (charity work, donations, some sensible advice), but I think religion is also a sanctified train wreck in certain ways. If you're an independent, critical thinker IMO, you tend to notice the many levels of magical and delusional thinking involved; how religion is often a thinly-veiled fairy tale salve for adults.
  • adthomasadthomas Posts: 5,525Registered Users
    Speaking of weave I went looking for a doll for my little cousins. I prefer to buy them black dolls with curly hair because I want to teach them love and accept themselves.. Where I live finding a nice non white doll ie black, asian ect that is reasonably priced and intended as a toy and not a collector doll is pure luck. No luck today with finding a natural curly hair but I saw this one doll called So In Style Barbie. This is a line of black dolls and she comes with several hair pieces. I don't have kids so forgive me if this is old news.

    NAPPY NATURALLY: Barbie Presents So In Style Dolls for Little SISters
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  • itsKelCeeEeeitsKelCeeEee Posts: 1,084Registered Users
    Blueblood wrote: »
    Lovemenappy one of the points of religion is to give moral guidance.

    So if a pastor or any religious leader sees his/her flock spending money they cannot afford on something that is frivolous rather than an essential item, it's their job to speak up about it.

    No. It's not his job or point of authority to tell a group of people how to spend their money. He is not Jesus. He is not God. He's a random man giving a Bill Cosbyesque rant based off of his experience with someone in his congregation.

    This man is given more credit than he deserves. His rant was in regard to weaves. It didn't get any deeper than that. Banning weaves from a church does not in anyway prevent said person from spending their money frivolously. I didn't pay a dime for my last install, I'll be damned if I have someone preaching in my face about me wearing a weave and how I purchased it, when it's none of his business. What else will he ban? Shoes? Cars? What about if someone has a $20 lunch?...or the people that spend ungodly amounts *see natural hair community* on hair products? It's just stupid for him to point out weaves as if that is the culprit as to why people are not managing their money correctly....because it's not. There are a plethora of other people who spend their money recklessly and don't have a weave.

    Yet another reason why I'm not religious or a Christian.

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  • caracara01caracara01 Posts: 119Registered Users
    Blueblood wrote: »
    Lovemenappy one of the points of religion is to give moral guidance.

    So if a pastor or any religious leader sees his/her flock spending money they cannot afford on something that is frivolous rather than an essential item, it's their job to speak up about it.

    No. It's not his job or point of authority to tell a group of people how to spend their money. He is not Jesus. He is not God. He's a random man giving a Bill Cosbyesque rant based off of his experience with someone in his congregation.

    This man is given more credit than he deserves. His rant was in regard to weaves. It didn't get any deeper than that. Banning weaves from a church does not in anyway prevent said person from spending their money frivolously. I didn't pay a dime for my last install, I'll be damned if I have someone preaching in my face about me wearing a weave and how I purchased it, when it's none of his business. What else will he ban? Shoes? Cars? What about if someone has a $20 lunch?...or the people that spend ungodly amounts *see natural hair community* on hair products? It's just stupid for him to point out weaves as if that is the culprit as to why people are not managing their money correctly....because it's not. There are a plethora of other people who spend their money recklessly and don't have a weave.

    Yet another reason why I'm not religious or a Christian.

    One man's misguided attempt to help his flock do better and live better in no way, shape or form would ever make me denounce my love for a Jesus Christ. If you don't like his message, fine, but don't condemn Christianity in general, because you don't like what some random pastor preached.
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