Gonna Cry Soon

After looking at my mom go natural for about several months I decided to try it myself. I had the bc done in the middle of last month but I kept it flat ironed till last Thursday. I found that my mom's hair and my hair are very different. :D

I have these soft, tight lil curls that I hate soooo much. Everyone else thought the hairstyle was cute but I had no confidence going out in public with it. What I really want are elongated(sp?) curls but I dont know how to achieve that atm.

So I just decided to flat iron my hair again yesterday on my own...I hate doing hair...which took forever and it turned out to be one big, puffy, rough mess. :evil: I left a big tuft of hair in the middle of my head because I got so frustrated with it.

Right now I have a bonnet on my head with an ugly afro under it. My hair always stands on top of my head when I dont tie it down before I go to sleep at night...perm or no perm...grrr

Sorry for typing so much...just needed to get this off my chest....I guess my question(s) would be

How do I achieve a look of elongated curls?

How could I flat iron my hair without it being a big, poofy mess at the end?

What are some good, manageable, short hairstyles I could try?

Please help.


Oh yeah my mom says I have 3b/3c hair.


  • Kasey314Kasey314 Posts: 308Registered Users
    Ambie, don't worry about ranting, that's what we're here for. We all understand how frustrating our hair can be! :D

    I am NOT an expert, but I recommend leaving some conditioner in your hair the next time you wash. When I do, it leaves my hair weighed down and make my curls look "longer".

    There is also a straigtening/relaxing board here, so maybe you could get some advice on ironing your hair there.

    HTH! GL learning to love your hair!
    ~FIA~ 2c-M-iii

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    Products-of-the-moment: Loving Innersense right now: Pure Essential Hair Bath, Pure Inspiration Daily Conditioner and I Create Quiet Calm Curl Cream. Devacurl Angell is my go to gel, nothing else like it for me. Nature's Gate Lavendar and Aloe Nourishing Conditoner is always in my shower.

    password - curly girl

  • Oregano  (formerly babywavy)Oregano (formerly babywavy) Posts: 5,297Registered Users
    Your hair is probably going to be curlier the shorter it is. You may actually have better luck with your hair if you let it grow some. Plus, then you will be able to pull it back if it's bugging you. The weight of long hair will elongate your curls a bit.
    ~ the artist formerly known as babywavy ~

    Please excuse any typos. For the time being, we are blaming it on my computer.
  • BrioBrio Posts: 1,432Registered Users
    I'm not sure if their is any way to change your curl pattern to get elongated curls if you have really tight curls. I have heard of some folks putting some of those small metal (duckbill sorta) hair clips on a few curls to pull them down a bit. However, if your curl pattern is small and tightly wound, I don't think that will help. Some very moisturizing conditioners ([buylink=]curls milkshake[/buylink] comes to mind) might help some in relaxing the curl a bit.

    I'm sure, though, if you look around this bulletin board and website, you'll find some curls that look similar to yours and get some ideas on how to style them. Lots of folks have links in the signature line to photo albums. Also, there is a "curlpix" section that has lots of photos of real people.

    There are lots of us here that have struggled with our hair and have struggled with learning to accept it. Don't give up. After a while, you may even begin to love those ringlets.
    Frizz Happens!
    my Fotki hair journey/experiment diary PW is brio (and I really need to update it!)

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  • medusahairmedusahair Posts: 3,515Registered Users
    Some have success brushing their products into their curls. That certainly pulls some curl out of mine. Heavier products will weigh down the curls too.
    That Garnier fructis soft curl cream always makes my curls longer too and real big loops.

    Now mind you I don't do these things. I want my curl tighter but I have what I have, long loose loops.
    Things to NOT use, don't use aloe, things like recoil, any curl enhancers, no peach products. All those things enhance curl.

    I have to say in this case maybe some cones might do the hair good. Cones rob the hair of moisture so at least on my hair I get no frizz and my hair doesn't coil up as tight. Now you'd have to be good to your hair and make sure you safely remove the cones etc or they can be a bad thing but they def pull some curl out of my hair.
    Low porosity, medium texture.
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    If it smells good put it in your hair, if it tastes good spit it out!
  • echokittenechokitten Posts: 1,751Registered Users
    Let it out girl. The only way to true accceptance is to get all the negative feelings out. I hated my hair for YEARS before I realized that the only reason I hated it was because I was told by other non curlies that curly wasn't pretty, professional, sexy blah blah blah blah blah. That was when I finally took my mom's advice: Do the best you can with what you've got. Now I love my hair even when I feel it is not cooperating. It just takes a little time and experimentation to make it right for you.
    We're here for you sister...
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    "Nothing makes a woman more beautiful than the belief that she is beautiful." -Sophia Loren
  • SystemSystem Posts: 39,059 Administrator
    Your sig line says your hair is 3b/3c. That's not insanely curly and many people here have hair of that type that looks beautiful. I think if you get your hair into good condition and use good products, you will find it can look great.
  • foxycus02foxycus02 Posts: 918Registered Users
    You might get a bit more feedback if you go into the 3C or 4A section of the board. Its ok if you want to wear your hair straight as you get more length, I did it. To get nice straight hair without damaging your curls use a gentle shampoo and do a deep treatment at least once a week. Before you flat iron, rollerset or Blowdry your hair, and then flat iron. You should invest in a good one if you could. It will save your hair and your patience.
    To elongate your curls, dont rinse conditioner out of your hair. Leave it in and layer it with a gel or a product like Kinky curly custard. Wear headbands, twistouts. You can make short hair work for you, just play with it. Dont think of your hair as time wasted, but creativity time to make yourself look extra cute. Take pics, post them on fotki and share with us the wonderful styles you came up with. We are always looking for ideas.

    rockin' to the tune of her own beat...

  • CurlyQTPieCurlyQTPie Posts: 447Registered Users
    I think we have all gone through a phase where we've hated our curly locks. Curly hair can be hard to manage if you don't know what you're doing. For me, I never could have achieved the look I have now without the help of this board and going to get my deva haircut from someone who specializes in curly hair.

    If you can, perhaps seek out the help of a stylist in your area who specializes in your type of hair. They can give you a cut (or trim) that will help your hair reach its full potential and can also give you tips on how to sytle and what you can do to be your best curly self.

    Seriously, I never had real ringlet curls before I started the CG method and got my deva cut and now I have amazing curls and everyone always says how pretty they are and to think I spent so much time hating my hair! You can learn to love it, if you learn how to manage it.
    3B with some 3a. Fell off but am now back on the CG bandwagon and looking for my HG products.