CurlTalk

Curly hair is oppressed

SamanthascurlzSamanthascurlz Posts: 1,082Registered Users
For about two years, I have been going to the same salon to get my hair trimmed every few months. 11 months ago was when I decided to go completely natural, so I knew getting trims would be difficult. However, I figured to make it easier for everyone, when I would go to get my trims, I would straighten my hair specifically for my trims.

Just a few days ago, I knew I needed a trim; however, for the first time, I didn't straighten my hair. I decided to simply walk in, and hope one of the stylists would know what to do. I decided, why should I have to go out of my way every few months to straighten my hair, so a stylist can trim it. Once I walked into the salon, I spoke to the stylist. First thing I asked, "Do you know how to cut curly hair?" He looked at my hair, like it was something never seen before. It was second day hair, so nothing scary (lol). The stylist looks at my hair and replies, "Eh, I have never done curly hair, but I can try." That was a red flag. So I said, "Well, that's ok then I don't want you touching my hair, if you don't know what you're doing."
"If you come back in tomorrow, I have a girl who has cut 'spanish peoples' hair." I looked at him and said yeah ok and walked out.

I was so frustrated. 'spanish peoples' hair? What does that have to do with curly hair. I am not hispanic and I thought it was an ignorant comment. Curly hair shouldn't be based on culture. When I called another salon later that day, they were gonna charge me $60 just because I have curly hair.

My point is, us curly girls are oppressed. I still haven't gotten a trim because now I am paranoid that no one knows what they're doing with curly hair. On top of it, I don't feel that I should pay $60 to trim HALF AN INCH OF HAIR, JUST BECAUSE I WAS *BORN* with curly hair. I swear, we are oppressed and unconsciously forced to straighten, because it is easier for everyone else.

My question to you: What do you all think?
CG, High Porosity, Fine, Low Density, Medium Elasticity
Suave, V05, GF Go clean gel, ACV rinses, CO, and Gelatine PT.
[URL="[url=http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/members/samanthascurlz-albums-evolvement-my-hair.html]Curls[/url]"][/url]Curls

Comments

  • bobbybobby Posts: 669Registered Users
    For about two years, I have been going to the same salon to get my hair trimmed every few months. 11 months ago was when I decided to go completely natural, so I knew getting trims would be difficult. However, I figured to make it easier for everyone, when I would go to get my trims, I would straighten my hair specifically for my trims.

    Just a few days ago, I knew I needed a trim; however, for the first time, I didn't straighten my hair. I decided to simply walk in, and hope one of the stylists would know what to do. I decided, why should I have to go out of my way every few months to straighten my hair, so a stylist can trim it. Once I walked into the salon, I spoke to the stylist. First thing I asked, "Do you know how to cut curly hair?" He looked at my hair, like it was something never seen before. It was second day hair, so nothing scary (lol). The stylist looks at my hair and replies, "Eh, I have never done curly hair, but I can try." That was a red flag. So I said, "Well, that's ok then I don't want you touching my hair, if you don't know what you're doing."
    "If you come back in tomorrow, I have a girl who has cut 'spanish peoples' hair." I looked at him and said yeah ok and walked out.

    I was so frustrated. 'spanish peoples' hair? What does that have to do with curly hair. I am not hispanic and I thought it was an ignorant comment. Curly hair shouldn't be based on culture. When I called another salon later that day, they were gonna charge me $60 just because I have curly hair.

    My point is, us curly girls are oppressed. I still haven't gotten a trim because now I am paranoid that no one knows what they're doing with curly hair. On top of it, I don't feel that I should pay $60 to trim HALF AN INCH OF HAIR, JUST BECAUSE I WAS *BORN* with curly hair. I swear, we are oppressed and unconsciously forced to straighten, because it is easier for everyone else.

    My question to you: What do you all think?

    Very sorry you had to deal with that but what you are saying has at least some truth. It's the corporate mindset that has fed into this mentality. I hear conflicting reports though whether straightening is all the rage. However, you are more likely to see curlies straightening their hair than straighthaired people getting a perm like the 70s and 80s.
    2B always with potential of white man's fro

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  • SamanthascurlzSamanthascurlz Posts: 1,082Registered Users
    bobby wrote: »
    For about two years, I have been going to the same salon to get my hair trimmed every few months. 11 months ago was when I decided to go completely natural, so I knew getting trims would be difficult. However, I figured to make it easier for everyone, when I would go to get my trims, I would straighten my hair specifically for my trims.

    Just a few days ago, I knew I needed a trim; however, for the first time, I didn't straighten my hair. I decided to simply walk in, and hope one of the stylists would know what to do. I decided, why should I have to go out of my way every few months to straighten my hair, so a stylist can trim it. Once I walked into the salon, I spoke to the stylist. First thing I asked, "Do you know how to cut curly hair?" He looked at my hair, like it was something never seen before. It was second day hair, so nothing scary (lol). The stylist looks at my hair and replies, "Eh, I have never done curly hair, but I can try." That was a red flag. So I said, "Well, that's ok then I don't want you touching my hair, if you don't know what you're doing."
    "If you come back in tomorrow, I have a girl who has cut 'spanish peoples' hair." I looked at him and said yeah ok and walked out.

    I was so frustrated. 'spanish peoples' hair? What does that have to do with curly hair. I am not hispanic and I thought it was an ignorant comment. Curly hair shouldn't be based on culture. When I called another salon later that day, they were gonna charge me $60 just because I have curly hair.

    My point is, us curly girls are oppressed. I still haven't gotten a trim because now I am paranoid that no one knows what they're doing with curly hair. On top of it, I don't feel that I should pay $60 to trim HALF AN INCH OF HAIR, JUST BECAUSE I WAS *BORN* with curly hair. I swear, we are oppressed and unconsciously forced to straighten, because it is easier for everyone else.

    My question to you: What do you all think?

    Very sorry you had to deal with that but what you are saying has at least some truth. It's the corporate mindset that has fed into this mentality. I hear conflicting reports though whether straightening is all the rage. However, you are more likely to see curlies straightening their hair than straighthaired people getting a perm like the 70s and 80s.


    Yeah it isn't a trend for straightened people to curl their hair. My point though, I shouldn't have to pay more money to get my hair trimmed because I was born with curly hair. I understand straighten hair is easier to trim, but I shouldn't have to pay more bc stylists aren't trained for BOTH types of hair.
    CG, High Porosity, Fine, Low Density, Medium Elasticity
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  • jaclyn15jaclyn15 Posts: 227Registered Users
    I hear you!! I fear haircuts and avoid them as much as possible. It's a nightmare finding someone who knows what they are doing. I've even been to deva stylists and had bad experiences. It's a problem with education... most stylists never learn to work with natural curls. It's not a part of their curriculum. Such a huge oversight!! I'm thinking of teaching myself to self trim. Can't be any worse than what bad stylists have done to me!
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  • bobbybobby Posts: 669Registered Users
    I get mine trimmed every three months because it's the perfect balance between enjoying my curls and not having them be a headache to take care of. My stylist is a lady with naturally curly hair that straighten hers. It's hard as a guy because I wore mine short and cropped for 20 years but by the time I reached my early 30s (33) I grew it longer. It took me watching other guys lose their hair early to appreciate what I had. Now, I couldn't imagine myself without my curls. To that end, I say this, "Curls aren't just for girls."
    2B always with potential of white man's fro

    http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/members/bobby-albums-my-album.html

    "Curls aren't just for girls"
  • Aqua_LilyAqua_Lily Posts: 557Registered Users
    Sorry you guys had to deal with that, Samanthascurlz and Jaclyn15 :(

    I, too, have always strongly disliked hair trims and stylists... with all due respect >_<

    Actually Jaclyn15 I taught myself how to trim my own hair, and I can recommend it to you, it's actually very easy :) and cheap, and I'm SO glad I no longer have to visit stylists. Just wet your hair (no need to straighten it), divide your hair in sections and cut an equal length from each section. Also, don't worry about tiny mistakes, you have curly hair so you can't see it when you make minor mistakes :) hmmm, that actually makes me wonder why stylists seem reluctant/scared to cut curly hair, I think it would be MUCH more difficult to cut straight hair cuz you have to make sure all hair has EXACTLY the same length... or it looks very bad.

    Oh and do not forget: use a trimming scissor not a regular scissor!! Otherwise you damage your hair.
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  • KorkscrewKorkscrew Posts: 1,834Registered Users
    I really do feel your pain Samantha, but I personally think curly hair often does demand more work and time if it's skillfully cut and styled.

    I have really thick and long, curly hair and understand that my hair is so much harder to manage than someone with thin, short, straight hair. If I saw me walking into some salon I worked in and wasn't used to really curly hair, I might just break into hives and faint. So I get that it could be overwhelming for those who aren't used to it.

    The extra expenditure is worth it IMO, provided the person truly is good with curls.
  • SamanthascurlzSamanthascurlz Posts: 1,082Registered Users
    jaclyn15 wrote: »
    I hear you!! I fear haircuts and avoid them as much as possible. It's a nightmare finding someone who knows what they are doing. I've even been to deva stylists and had bad experiences. It's a problem with education... most stylists never learn to work with natural curls. It's not a part of their curriculum. Such a huge oversight!! I'm thinking of teaching myself to self trim. Can't be any worse than what bad stylists have done to me!

    I am thinking about trimming myself too. And you're right, if you do mess up a little when you trim, at least it was your own mistake not someone elses.
    CG, High Porosity, Fine, Low Density, Medium Elasticity
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  • SamanthascurlzSamanthascurlz Posts: 1,082Registered Users
    Aqua_Lily wrote: »
    Sorry you guys had to deal with that, Samanthascurlz and Jaclyn15 :(

    I, too, have always strongly disliked hair trims and stylists... with all due respect >_<

    Actually Jaclyn15 I taught myself how to trim my own hair, and I can recommend it to you, it's actually very easy :) and cheap, and I'm SO glad I no longer have to visit stylists. Just wet your hair (no need to straighten it), divide your hair in sections and cut an equal length from each section. Also, don't worry about tiny mistakes, you have curly hair so you can't see it when you make minor mistakes :) hmmm, that actually makes me wonder why stylists seem reluctant/scared to cut curly hair, I think it would be MUCH more difficult to cut straight hair cuz you have to make sure all hair has EXACTLY the same length... or it looks very bad.

    Oh and do not forget: use a trimming scissor not a regular scissor!! Otherwise you damage your hair.

    Well you have wonderful hair, as a side note. Like jaclyn15, I am considering trimming. I will try your advice when I have the necessary products to trim it. Thanks a lot!
    CG, High Porosity, Fine, Low Density, Medium Elasticity
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  • SamanthascurlzSamanthascurlz Posts: 1,082Registered Users
    Korkscrew wrote: »
    I really do feel your pain Samantha, but I personally think curly hair often does demand more work and time if it's skillfully cut and styled.

    I have really thick and long, curly hair and understand that my hair is so much harder to manage than someone with thin, short, straight hair. If I saw me walking into some salon I worked in and wasn't used to really curly hair, I might just break into hives and faint. So I get that it could be overwhelming for those who aren't used to it.

    The extra expenditure is worth it IMO, provided the person truly is good with curls.

    I get what you're saying. At the same time, my point is I shouldn't have to pay more for something I can't control. I have thick curly hair too. And I do get that it will take more time for a stylist because it isn't a quick snip like someone with straightened hair. But, I think it's BS for curly hair to be looked at as if it something so beyond controlled that I have to pay more for it. Like I said, I see what you're saying, but I am trying to look at the bigger picture of us curly girls having to go through greater hoops for simple things like a trim.
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  • KorkscrewKorkscrew Posts: 1,834Registered Users
    Samantha, I understand your frustration when all you're looking for is a trim, as opposed to an involved cut. Reflecting on what you've said here, I'm reminded that some stylists have an attitude that having to do anything with curly hair is like sweat shop labor and worthy of charging a full day's salary for ... Is that along the lines of what you're getting at?

    I actually second that idea about trimming curly hair ourselves as a cost-effective alternative. Then, when I want to get it cut and shaped, I do a bunch of research and choose a stylist who specializes in curly hair. I make sure to check out any online reviews on that stylist too, before committing. It really is a shame that we can't just stroll into any old salon and hope for a decent curly trim or cut.
  • SamanthascurlzSamanthascurlz Posts: 1,082Registered Users
    Korkscrew wrote: »
    Samantha, I understand your frustration when all you're looking for is a trim, as opposed to an involved cut. Reflecting on what you've said here, I'm reminded that some stylists have an attitude that having to do anything with curly hair is like sweat shop labor and worthy of charging a full day's salary for ... Is that along the lines of what you're getting at?

    I actually second that idea about trimming curly hair ourselves as a cost-effective alternative. Then, when I want to get it cut and shaped, I do a bunch of research and choose a stylist who specializes in curly hair. I make sure to check out any online reviews on that stylist too, before committing. It really is a shame that we can't just stroll into any old salon and hope for a decent curly trim or cut.

    EXACTLY! Yeah, I guess unfortunately I just have to do the same. I have to actually look and schedule rather than be able to just go somewhere. Do you trim your own hair? If so, do you find it difficult? I am very nervous.
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  • KorkscrewKorkscrew Posts: 1,834Registered Users
    I trim my hair once in a while, but only if I notice some subtle uneven curl poking out somewhere. I think you'll be fine trimming your hair. It REALLY is true that curly hair can be forgiving and an awkward snip here or there is likely not to show up much. It's usually only when you start trying to shape the whole head yourself (without having practiced it before, or without cosmetology training) that you risk a DEFCON 5 level disaster ;)

    Instead of doing an overall trim, I just go ahead and get a Deva cut every 6 months - and I do mean CUT, not trim lol ... cause my hair grows fast as weeds. It actually turns out to be a reasonable price because the cut gives me such great shape that I can go half the year w/out paying for another cut :) I love the fact that the Deva cut method is performed on dry curls. That makes me feel a lot more comfortable w/scissors approaching my head :toothy4:
  • cookiepiecookiepie Posts: 12Registered Users
    That is a very interesting point that you make Samantha! I feel differently, I feel more free and more myself, with my curls. I feel as though I was oppressed when I felt like I had to straighten my hair to be normal and fit in with the general public. The amount of time that it took to straighten my hair was insane! I can't believe I did it as long as I did! Since I have gone natural I have not straightened my hair for a cut ever. I'm lucky enough to have my sister as my stylist and she gets it! She has been CG herself for several months now & is trying to get more of her clients to jump on the curly bus! You have to find the right stylist!!!!
  • christina.grchristina.gr Posts: 30Registered Users
    Make sure you invest in a good Professional pair of scissors from a beauty supply store otherwise you'll do more damage than its worth. Cheapo scissor = bad curls. I've done it a few times :(
    But there is no reason why you should pay more for a cut based on your hair texture. My stylist is fab & only $35 for wash, cut & style. Although she isn't curly herself, she understands that our hair needs a different approach. If you have curly friends, co-workers ask around for recs. Best of luck!
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  • SamanthascurlzSamanthascurlz Posts: 1,082Registered Users
    Korkscrew wrote: »
    I trim my hair once in a while, but only if I notice some subtle uneven curl poking out somewhere. I think you'll be fine trimming your hair. It REALLY is true that curly hair can be forgiving and an awkward snip here or there is likely not to show up much. It's usually only when you start trying to shape the whole head yourself (without having practiced it before, or without cosmetology training) that you risk a DEFCON 5 level disaster ;)

    Instead of doing an overall trim, I just go ahead and get a Deva cut every 6 months - and I do mean CUT, not trim lol ... cause my hair grows fast as weeds. It actually turns out to be a reasonable price because the cut gives me such great shape that I can go half the year w/out paying for another cut :) I love the fact that the Deva cut method is performed on dry curls. That makes me feel a lot more comfortable w/scissors approaching my head :toothy4:


    LOL at the defcon 5 level! You're absolutely right, a DEVA cut would be amazing. I want to save up for one. And very true, a little mess up with the trim isn't a big deal. It makes me feel more confident knowing others have trimmed before. And also I agree, deva cuts that cut dry does relay comfort to me too!
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  • SamanthascurlzSamanthascurlz Posts: 1,082Registered Users
    cookiepie wrote: »
    That is a very interesting point that you make Samantha! I feel differently, I feel more free and more myself, with my curls. I feel as though I was oppressed when I felt like I had to straighten my hair to be normal and fit in with the general public. The amount of time that it took to straighten my hair was insane! I can't believe I did it as long as I did! Since I have gone natural I have not straightened my hair for a cut ever. I'm lucky enough to have my sister as my stylist and she gets it! She has been CG herself for several months now & is trying to get more of her clients to jump on the curly bus! You have to find the right stylist!!!!

    You know what, putting it this way help me understand the idea of where I was going with this post. You're right, it is more the opposite in this sense. You do feel a blockage trying to straighten the natural curls bc you feel it as a mere acceptance in society. I mean hell, women WITH straight hair naturally straighten their hair (never understood that). You made an excellent point and made me step out of the box with my comment. Thank you!
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  • ChevelureChevelure Posts: 101Registered Users
    or a stylist trained by Devachan. I'm sure that if you contact them they'll have a suggestion. Salon | Devachan Salon

    It's not cheap to get one's hair cut there, but they do take time to cut the hair properly and they certainly don't insult people. There's also no hard sell to come back every two months, although if you can afford it, why not?

    Good luck.
  • ChevelureChevelure Posts: 101Registered Users
    Aqua_Lily wrote: »
    Sorry you guys had to deal with that, Samanthascurlz and Jaclyn15 :(

    I, too, have always strongly disliked hair trims and stylists... with all due respect >_<

    Actually Jaclyn15 I taught myself how to trim my own hair, and I can recommend it to you, it's actually very easy :) and cheap, and I'm SO glad I no longer have to visit stylists. Just wet your hair (no need to straighten it), divide your hair in sections and cut an equal length from each section. Also, don't worry about tiny mistakes, you have curly hair so you can't see it when you make minor mistakes :) hmmm, that actually makes me wonder why stylists seem reluctant/scared to cut curly hair, I think it would be MUCH more difficult to cut straight hair cuz you have to make sure all hair has EXACTLY the same length... or it looks very bad.

    Oh and do not forget: use a trimming scissor not a regular scissor!! Otherwise you damage your hair.

    That would never work for my hair. It needs to be layered and shaped. The new Devachan Curly Girl book does provide instructions on maintenance trims for in between appointments.
  • CurlyCutie1394CurlyCutie1394 Posts: 348Registered Users
    I say that unfair and that's why I just put my hair in twists and trim my own hair
  • KinkyCoilyCurlsKinkyCoilyCurls Posts: 95Registered Users
    I say that unfair and that's why I just put my hair in twists and trim my own hair

    I'm probably going to have to start doing that. I'm scared, but everyone is telling me to flat iron my hair. I was going to have a guy on campus cut my hair, but I'd have to flat iron it first, and my friends were looking at me like I'm crazy for refusing to flat iron my hair.
    I've had generally bad experiences in Salons since I BC'd and I'm still looking for salon. I think I'm going to try one last salon in my home city, and if it doesn't work out I'm going to have to suck it up and do it myself.
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  • hutchhutch Posts: 20Registered Users
    I say that unfair and that's why I just put my hair in twists and trim my own hair

    I'm probably going to have to start doing that. I'm scared, but everyone is telling me to flat iron my hair. I was going to have a guy on campus cut my hair, but I'd have to flat iron it first, and my friends were looking at me like I'm crazy for refusing to flat iron my hair.
    I've had generally bad experiences in Salons since I BC'd and I'm still looking for salon. I think I'm going to try one last salon in my home city, and if it doesn't work out I'm going to have to suck it up and do it myself.

    Naptural85 has 2 great vids on how to trim hair. One for short hair and a updated one for her longer hair.
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  • ViolawanViolawan Posts: 5Registered Users
    I always make my hairstaight.
  • RobotQT1RobotQT1 Posts: 56Registered Users
    I totally understand your frustration. :sad3: I decided to no longer go to one of my usual salons because I was hoping they could even out my hair (I got an "emo hair" haircut there a few years ago and after going natural I realized it just looked awful with curls). The stylist, who told me she had a mixed-race niece with the same hair as mine, had NO idea what she was doing so I had to settle for her trimming off some dead stuff. This was a hair school, but not even the TEACHER knew what to do!!

    I went to a different salon, also one of my regular places, and they're going to have my business from now on. Though the stylist didn't seem to be a curly, she was experienced with my hair type and both she and the instructor knew what they were doing and were able to correct the cut. I'll have to let my hair grow out more before it starts to look better, but I'm more confident in their training with curly hair.

    What absolutely KILLED me though was a different salon. This wasn't even a hair school, but I went in and asked if there were any stylists experienced with curly hair. The woman said yes, but he wasn't in. I explained that I was going natural because it's better for my hair and I'm trying to grow it out. Guess what she said next. "How about we straighten it when we trim it?" *****. PLEASE. When she saw the look of horror on my face she said they didn't have to, but suggesting straightening when I JUST SAID I'm trying to grow out my hair and take better care of it was what made me decide not to go there.

    A few times I've been asked if I'd like to get my hair straightened when I walk into a salon. I'm not offended by that, since they must be used to curlies walking in for a straightening. What did offend me was when the salon that I'm not going to anymore just put straightening on my ticket when I had already specifically said that I'm not straightening my hair anymore.

    Aside from this stuff, though, I honestly wouldn't say we're oppressed. However, I do think curly hair gets the short end of the stick. Some fashion trends I like seem to favor straight hair for the overall style (and the hair makes the look), and it seems like a lot of hair trends/cute hair cuts only work for straight hair. Shopping for products that won't deprive my hair of moisture is a bit difficult sometimes, too. The store I work at sells hair products but they all have mineral oil, sulfates and cones in them. Oh yeah, and f*** you WalMart for putting relaxers and flat irons in the "ethnic"/curly hair aisle!
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  • SamanthascurlzSamanthascurlz Posts: 1,082Registered Users
    RobotQT1 wrote: »
    I totally understand your frustration. :sad3: I decided to no longer go to one of my usual salons because I was hoping they could even out my hair (I got an "emo hair" haircut there a few years ago and after going natural I realized it just looked awful with curls). The stylist, who told me she had a mixed-race niece with the same hair as mine, had NO idea what she was doing so I had to settle for her trimming off some dead stuff. This was a hair school, but not even the TEACHER knew what to do!!

    I went to a different salon, also one of my regular places, and they're going to have my business from now on. Though the stylist didn't seem to be a curly, she was experienced with my hair type and both she and the instructor knew what they were doing and were able to correct the cut. I'll have to let my hair grow out more before it starts to look better, but I'm more confident in their training with curly hair.

    What absolutely KILLED me though was a different salon. This wasn't even a hair school, but I went in and asked if there were any stylists experienced with curly hair. The woman said yes, but he wasn't in. I explained that I was going natural because it's better for my hair and I'm trying to grow it out. Guess what she said next. "How about we straighten it when we trim it?" *****. PLEASE. When she saw the look of horror on my face she said they didn't have to, but suggesting straightening when I JUST SAID I'm trying to grow out my hair and take better care of it was what made me decide not to go there.

    A few times I've been asked if I'd like to get my hair straightened when I walk into a salon. I'm not offended by that, since they must be used to curlies walking in for a straightening. What did offend me was when the salon that I'm not going to anymore just put straightening on my ticket when I had already specifically said that I'm not straightening my hair anymore.

    Aside from this stuff, though, I honestly wouldn't say we're oppressed. However, I do think curly hair gets the short end of the stick. Some fashion trends I like seem to favor straight hair for the overall style (and the hair makes the look), and it seems like a lot of hair trends/cute hair cuts only work for straight hair. Shopping for products that won't deprive my hair of moisture is a bit difficult sometimes, too. The store I work at sells hair products but they all have mineral oil, sulfates and cones in them. Oh yeah, and f*** you WalMart for putting relaxers and flat irons in the "ethnic"/curly hair aisle!

    I guess I see oppressed as being the short end of the stick. But I am slowly getting over it. I'd rather stand out for being natural then blend in by straightening. Now, I don't like bashing people with straight hair so I don't want to come out like that. I am just saying that I am just proud to embrace what I am given.
    I agree, it's funny the certain things put under the 'ethnic' section.
    CG, High Porosity, Fine, Low Density, Medium Elasticity
    Suave, V05, GF Go clean gel, ACV rinses, CO, and Gelatine PT.
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