CurlTalk

Very very depressed..

DepressedCurlsDepressedCurls Posts: 836Registered Users
I've been missing from here for a couple weeks...because my hair is causing me to just be very upset to the point i didn't even wanna talk about it. I just hid it in a bun. But I'm finally at my wits end with this. I wanna chop it off. My hair is thick, in the sense i have a lot of it. but the bottom of my hair grows uneven and it's not as curly. I don't know why. It's always been this way. It's curly at first, but loses it's curl so quickly which makes my hair look bad. It's also thinner at the bottom. I wanna chop it off but i don't wanna keep starting over and over of it's just growing that way. I don't know what to do or where to turn next.. :( the pic shows how the bottom is so much thinner. And the right side is longer, but you can't tell how bad it is by the angle..i just need help or advice or something. :(

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Comments

  • wild~hairwild~hair Posts: 9,890Registered Users
    Are you okay?

    I can't help but noticed your username and the title to this thread. Are you getting help for your depression?

    Your hair, by the way, is freaking gorgeous. Truly. Enviable hair. But I suppose you can't see that if you're depressed.
  • goldygoldy Posts: 5,455Registered Users
    I have no advice for your hair cause the curls look gorgeous!

    I ditto the pp. Is everything okay?
    Poodlehead wrote:
    Ah, it all makes sense now. Goldy is the puppet master! :lol:
  • DepressedCurlsDepressedCurls Posts: 836Registered Users
    I have, yeah. They say "it's just hair, doesn't define you" even tried to talk me into cutting it all to make me feel free. All that'd do is make it worse. I just want my hair to be at it's full potential. But it seems it just keeps getting worse. Damaged, even though i don't use heat or mishandled it. Uneven. Thinning. Idk. I guess it just comes with having curly hair.

    Sent from my SPH-D710 using CurlTalk App
  • NvmbrCurlssNvmbrCurlss Posts: 732Registered Users
    Ur hair looks like mine! Except urs is muuuuch thicker. If u think that's thinning...I'm in trouble....it looks to me like ur ends curl into spirals, while ur shaft waves and swaves...totally normal for the clumps to spread apart like this:) FYI, it does not look thin...
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]3B, Fine, Normal P, Normal E, Low-Med D
    LowP: Kinky Curly Come Clean (50% EVOO)
    NoP: As I Am CC
    RO: Suave Coconut, VO5 Shea Cashmere
    LI: KCKT or CJBCLI or HETT/HENOYF (w/ 8 drops GSO)


    "To much is given, much is expected"
  • generositytgenerosityt Posts: 245Registered Users
    First, your hair is very pretty let me tell you. Second, I feel for you, for a long time I had the same problem (I still have it! you can see in my profile picture how the right part is longer and thicker than the left part). I thought I could fix the problem by cutting the curls in the longer part to even it out, however, after a few month other curls will grow longer than the rest and it will look uneven again.
    So what I did was: accept it! I just don't mess with it anymore. I accepted the fact that my hair does its own thing and grew to like it the way it is. When someone tells me your hair is uneven in the back I tell them: I know! Isn't it funny how it's just hair but it has its own character and it does its own thing! To me my hair is like my child, I accept it even with the things that bothers me so much about it. There are many things I could think of that would make my daughter the perfect child, however she is perfect with all the things that are "unperfect" in her.
    I know it's hard to do and it takes a while (I went through bad periods of anger towards my hair) but if you hang in there you may grow to accept it and please don't cut it, you may think that we're only telling you this to support you but I am 100% honest, your hair is gorgeous, it's full of life and thick and just beautiful!
    A Mediterranean 3b lady
    In love with my curls, love love love
    CG since Nov/07


    Co-Wash: VO5, Tresemme naturals, Fructis naturals
    Cond: Nature's Gate conditioners
    Stylers: Lotions made at home with coconut oil, honey, AVG, vegetable glycerin, OO, and EO.
    Gel: LA Looks sports gel for high humidity days.


    Hair goal: Waist length healthy curls
  • DepressedCurlsDepressedCurls Posts: 836Registered Users
    Thank you SO much guys. I'm feeling much better. Especially today at work, a lady with cancer came in and just went ON AND ON about my hair and how she wished she had my hair and how beautiful it was ect and she had lost all of hers...i shouldn't be so ungrateful when I'm so blessed!

    Sent from my SPH-D710 using CurlTalk App
  • BlackAngelPlayahBlackAngelPlayah Posts: 1,419Registered Users
    I feel ya. I love my hair and will keep it curly and such, but sometimes. I am just a bit TIRED OF IT!! I have all these bald areas in the front so no matter where I part it, BALD!! No part ain't got no business being that friggin WIDE! Uggggh!!!

    But your hair is gorgeous! :)

    Glad you're feeling better. :)


    💮

    😜🍸Sent LIVE from my JPhone 4s using some CurlTalk app. 😜🍸

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    :afro:FroZen:afro:
  • DepressedCurlsDepressedCurls Posts: 836Registered Users
    I feel ya. I love my hair and will keep it curly and such, but sometimes. I am just a bit TIRED OF IT!! I have all these bald areas in the front so no matter where I part it, BALD!! No part ain't got no business being that friggin WIDE! Uggggh!!!

    But your hair is gorgeous! :)

    Glad you're feeling better. :)


    💮

    😜🍸Sent LIVE from my JPhone 4s using some CurlTalk app. 😜🍸

    /home/leaving?target=http%3A%2F%2FAfroCurls.wordpress.com" class="Popup

    Curlyhairproblems!!

    But thank you, so do you. I admire tighter curls. :)

    Sent from my SPH-D710 using CurlTalk App
  • wildasshairwildasshair Posts: 4Registered Users
    Your hair is absolutely gorgeous! Don't cut it, please! My hair seems thinner at the bottom, too. I think what happens to mine is that it curls up tighter underneath, so by the time you look at the bottom of my hair, it looks thinner. When I used to straighten it with a flat iron, it didn't seem thinner. Do you think that might be happening with your hair? You're hair is so thick and lovely! What do you use on your hair? I like the way it doesn't look parched (like mine does most of the time).

    Is your depression really about your hair, honey? The reason I'm asking is because I suffer from depression and have all my life. Sometimes I blame parts of myself that I don't like (like my hair sometimes), but that's not really what is at the root of my depression. I still don't know what is at the root of my depression, probably a chemical imbalance, since it's been with me since my first memories of life. One thing I know for sure though, I was depressed long before I was aware of my hair. I take antidepressants. Some people freak out over antidepressants, but to someone who is depressed, they are a godsend. I guess antidepressants are kind of like curly hair -- some people object, but then again, who cares? Right? Be true to yourself and if you think they might help, don't be embarassed to see your doctor and have antidepressants prescribed for you. They don't make you happy, but they really do take away those really low, lows. Sorry. I know you didn't ask for advice about your depression. It's just that I care.
  • EricachristinaEricachristina Posts: 496Registered Users
    Glad you are feeling better, hair is nice but sometimes it's good to put things in perspective. I know how frustrating it can be when you work so hard taking care of your hair, you do all the right things and buy all the right products and your hair doesn't look exactly the way you want it to. We all have things that bother us, its normal.

    Your hair does look very nice.
  • TphamTpham Posts: 13Registered Users
    I agree. Your hair is gorgeous. You must be joking with us ;)
  • Fantastic1221Fantastic1221 Posts: 356Registered Users
    I understand. My hair tangles all the time. I snip out knots and split ends everyday. I feel guilty every time I manipulate it. But sometimes I just have to put my hair away in a bun or style that involves low to no manipulation and just go about life, not thinking about it.
    I find when I get ready to handle it, I'm more loving and accepting of its imperfections.
  • DepressedCurlsDepressedCurls Posts: 836Registered Users
    Thank you ladies. You guys have such lovely hair...it's comforting to know even you guys feel this way sometimes. I hit my low, it happens. But I'm back on track, and took my hair shopping at Sallys and Whole Foods today. So we're happy campers now. <3

    Sent from my SPH-D710 using CurlTalk App
  • bobbybobby Posts: 669Registered Users
    Thank you ladies. You guys have such lovely hair...it's comforting to know even you guys feel this way sometimes. I hit my low, it happens. But I'm back on track, and took my hair shopping at Sallys and Whole Foods today. So we're happy campers now. <3

    Sent from my SPH-D710 using CurlTalk App

    Welcome back. We missed seeing you.:)
    2B always with potential of white man's fro

    http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/members/bobby-albums-my-album.html

    "Curls aren't just for girls"
  • tasealstaseals Posts: 10Registered Users
    Maybe that's the way it grows? Oftentimes, the hair grows unevenly. So, do u think cutting it evenly will help? Ur depression about it is another thing. Ever thought u might need medical intervention? Try concentrating on ur ends. Getting ur moisturizers to the tips of ur hair is very important.
  • fefe912fefe912 Posts: 570Registered Users
    I feel ya. I love my hair and will keep it curly and such, but sometimes. I am just a bit TIRED OF IT!! I have all these bald areas in the front so no matter where I part it, BALD!! No part ain't got no business being that friggin WIDE! Uggggh!!!

    But your hair is gorgeous! :)

    Glad you're feeling better. :)


    &#55357;&#56494;

    &#55357;&#56860;&#55356;&#57208;Sent LIVE from my JPhone 4s using some CurlTalk app. &#55357;&#56860;&#55356;&#57208;

    FroZen

    I so feel you on this except my thin area is at the top of my head ugh if I don't fluff my hair enough of smooth it over a certain way it's soooooo noticable so I'm always paranoid grrr......

    Anyways @ depressedcurls like everyone else said your hair is gorgeous as are you so no worries ma'am :)
  • DepressedCurlsDepressedCurls Posts: 836Registered Users
    Exactly how i feel!

    But thank you, so are you. I guess we all have our insecurities..:/

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  • DEEVSDEEVS Posts: 13Registered Users
    I can relate to feeling depressed about your hair. I had beautiful curls that I ruined by "trying something different" and getting a brazilian blowout 4.5 months ago. Now I am stuck with straggly, frizzy, thinning hair. Looking in the mirror makes me wanna cry. I have found myself obsessing about how terrible it looks and how much I regret that decision. But that's a lot of negative energy I don't need and there's not much to do besides baby my hair and wait for it to grow back (fingers crossed!!) So, I am trying to just tie it up, forgive myself, focus on positivity and avoid mirrors;)
  • DepressedCurlsDepressedCurls Posts: 836Registered Users
    I'm so glad you guys can relate...it's a bad feeling. Overwhelming really. but there's more to us than our hair!

    Sent from my SPH-D710 using CurlTalk App
  • ShadiyahShadiyah Posts: 11Registered Users
    I've been missing from here for a couple weeks...because my hair is causing me to just be very upset to the point i didn't even wanna talk about it. I just hid it in a bun. But I'm finally at my wits end with this. I wanna chop it off. My hair is thick, in the sense i have a lot of it. but the bottom of my hair grows uneven and it's not as curly. I don't know why. It's always been this way. It's curly at first, but loses it's curl so quickly which makes my hair look bad. It's also thinner at the bottom. I wanna chop it off but i don't wanna keep starting over and over of it's just growing that way. I don't know what to do or where to turn next.. :( the pic shows how the bottom is so much thinner. And the right side is longer, but you can't tell how bad it is by the angle..i just need help or advice or something. :(

    Sent from my SPH-D710 using CurlTalk App

    I love your hair. I really don't see anything wrong with it. Our hair is not going to grow even, in the back of my hair the 2 sides grow longer than the middle back of my hair so it is like a M in the back. but if you are wearing it curly it don't really matter. if you are growing your hair then I say leave it alone and let it do it's thing it could be lead hairs and the rest have to catch up. or if you are at your goal I say get it cut in a style like a diva cut. but there is nothing wrong with your hair just get use to it.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    BC 12/2008
    Current L: BSL
    Goal: HL
    HT: 3b
    curlyummi.com