How to Be Young and Beautiful

VerityVerity Registered Users Posts: 616 Curl Neophyte
One of my Facebook friends posted a link to this blog entry:

http://bravegirlsclub.com/blog/?p=1323

Part of me wants to say, "Talk to me when you're 49, not 39," but I think there is wisdom here.

Comments

  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Scottsdale, AZRegistered Users Posts: 9,777 Curl Virtuoso
    Thanks for sharing this. I really enjoyed reading it. She did make a lot of sense about how we women are so hard on ourselves. With her new insight maybe she will do even better when she is 49, 59 and beyond.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • 2poodles2poodles Registered Users Posts: 2,485 Curl Connoisseur
    There is wisdom there. And I think it's a struggle that many of us women share. I don't know that men have quite the same issues. I'm still trying to figure out what aging gracefully means to me. I'm trying to be more accepting of my changing hair color and the new lines and sags. I'm not thrilled with them, lol, but I am trying to accept them as part of me. It is odd, though, to feel younger than I look. I want to look good - not necessarily younger (or at least not as if I'm trying too hard) but I do want to look healthy and vibrant and happy in my own skin. That's not always easy and certainly doesn't yet feel graceful. But I'm working on it.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]2Poodles :flower: Southeast PA
    fine, med porosity, normal elasticity
    Currently using the following 2 - 3 x/week:
    Living Proof Perfect Hair Day suphate-free Poo, cone-free CO and styling treatment, plus KCCC

  • RacerWife7RacerWife7 Ramsey, NJRegistered Users Posts: 895 Curl Novice
    I love this blog! Thank you for sharing, Verity! I shared it with all my fb friends. :)
    Janet ~ Northern NJ
    Properties: Dense, Fine, Low Porosity, Low Elasticity
    My Picasa Album
    What I used in this photo:
    Cleansing: Suave Tropical Coconut Condish
    Conditioner: CJ Smoothing Condish
    Styling: CJCQ
    th_d963586e.jpg
  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Scottsdale, AZRegistered Users Posts: 9,777 Curl Virtuoso
    2poodles wrote: »
    There is wisdom there. And I think it's a struggle that many of us women share. I don't know that men have quite the same issues. I'm still trying to figure out what aging gracefully means to me. I'm trying to be more accepting of my changing hair color and the new lines and sags. I'm not thrilled with them, lol, but I am trying to accept them as part of me. It is odd, though, to feel younger than I look. I want to look good - not necessarily younger (or at least not as if I'm trying too hard) but I do want to look healthy and vibrant and happy in my own skin. That's not always easy and certainly doesn't yet feel graceful. But I'm working on it.

    I watched a show many years ago about this very thing. There was a young woman who was made to look much older and she spent time with older women, talking to them. She said that you could see in their eyes that they were still young on the inside, but looked old on the outside. It was hard for them. They just had to accept that they were now invisible to men. It was really sad.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • 2poodles2poodles Registered Users Posts: 2,485 Curl Connoisseur
    I don't think it bothers me to not attract the attention of men as much as when I was younger. Of course that's probably because I'm happily married - and he's plenty attracted! I don't think I'd ever want to be "invisible" however. But I suspect with the right attitude, one never really has to become invisible....
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]2Poodles :flower: Southeast PA
    fine, med porosity, normal elasticity
    Currently using the following 2 - 3 x/week:
    Living Proof Perfect Hair Day suphate-free Poo, cone-free CO and styling treatment, plus KCCC

  • VerityVerity Registered Users Posts: 616 Curl Neophyte
    I know this has been discussed on another thread, but I think it's hard to give up the idea that you might be noticed by men. I was never a head-turner, even in my prime, so you'd think it would be easier for someone like me, but it..just..isn't. I think it's because our society values sexual attractiveness above almost everything else. Being able to free yourself from those expectations would be so liberating. I can't imagine what energy we'd have for other things if we were willing to let go of our goals and illusions about being pretty.
  • jeepcurlygurljeepcurlygurl Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Posts: 20,731 Curl Virtuoso
    Thanks for the link. I enjoyed it. The title of her article "How to be young and beautiful" is kind of irksome tho since her message was more like "How to feel beautiful at any age".
    --I'm located in Western PA.   --I found NC in late 2004, CG since February 2005, joined the forums in May 2005, started going grey in late 2005.   --My hair is 3B with some 3A, currently at mid back length when dry,  texture-medium/fine, porosity-top is low, middle is medium, ends are porous, elasticity-normal.   --My long time favorite products are Suave & VO5 conditioners, LA Looks Sport Gel, coconut oil, honey, vinegar.   
    --My CG and grey hair progress -  
    http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/going-gray/179328-jeepys-grey-hair-progress.html   
    --My article at NaturallyCurly about going grey - 
    https://www.naturallycurly.com/curlreading/color/how-i-went-completely-gray-and-loved-it
  • VerityVerity Registered Users Posts: 616 Curl Neophyte
    Perhaps the title is draw the reader in. We are, after all, obsessed with at least looking young.
  • jeepcurlygurljeepcurlygurl Registered Users, Curl Ambassador Posts: 20,731 Curl Virtuoso
    I guess it irked me because I'm one of the few who is NOT obsessed with looking young. I almost didn't read it because of the title. But I know I'm the minority on that. Just a negative feeling I had from it so I thought I'd throw it out there.
    --I'm located in Western PA.   --I found NC in late 2004, CG since February 2005, joined the forums in May 2005, started going grey in late 2005.   --My hair is 3B with some 3A, currently at mid back length when dry,  texture-medium/fine, porosity-top is low, middle is medium, ends are porous, elasticity-normal.   --My long time favorite products are Suave & VO5 conditioners, LA Looks Sport Gel, coconut oil, honey, vinegar.   
    --My CG and grey hair progress -  
    http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/going-gray/179328-jeepys-grey-hair-progress.html   
    --My article at NaturallyCurly about going grey - 
    https://www.naturallycurly.com/curlreading/color/how-i-went-completely-gray-and-loved-it
  • 2poodles2poodles Registered Users Posts: 2,485 Curl Connoisseur
    I know what you mean, jeep. I don't have a goal to look "young". I have a goal to look - and feel - as healthy and happy as possible.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]2Poodles :flower: Southeast PA
    fine, med porosity, normal elasticity
    Currently using the following 2 - 3 x/week:
    Living Proof Perfect Hair Day suphate-free Poo, cone-free CO and styling treatment, plus KCCC

  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Scottsdale, AZRegistered Users Posts: 9,777 Curl Virtuoso
    I just want to look the best I can at my age. I'm 59 and if I tried to look 21 again, it would be disastrous, like so many of the celeb botched up surgeries. I'm just not ready to give up on myself. I think we can look good in our 40's, 50's, 60's and beyond. It may take a little nip and tuck and exercising and a good diet, but I think it's worth it. We have to work at it, whereas most of us didn't when we were in our 20's or even our 30's. It's just a fact of life and either you give up or you work harder. I think it's up to the individual.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • kerri21kerri21 Registered Users Posts: 5
    to stay young you have to do exercise.
  • BekkaPooBekkaPoo EarthRegistered Users Posts: 3,861 Curl Neophyte
    I'm not yet 40, but I am married and I ride my bike to and from work every day (trust me, I dress purposely bummy and non-sexy). I am waiting for the day I'm invisible to men other than my hubby. I get street harassment on a daily basis and I don't think it's flattering or fun at all.. in fact it makes me feel threatened and like a target, which is why I have taken jujitsu for the last two years. I don't know if/when one of these jerks on the street will escalate from a hoot to something more violent.

    I look forward to the day where I can walk down the street or on my bike in peace.
    "The challenge is to be yourself in a world that is trying to make you like everybody else."
    "...rationality is not necessary to sell things.."
    My staples: Mane n Tail (cowash), Garnier Fructis Sleek n Shine (leave in condish), Grapeseed oil or shea butter (sealing), Organic Root Stimulator Elasticitea (leave-in condish & light hold)
  • 2poodles2poodles Registered Users Posts: 2,485 Curl Connoisseur
    BekkaPoo wrote: »
    I'm not yet 40, but I am married and I ride my bike to and from work every day (trust me, I dress purposely bummy and non-sexy). I am waiting for the day I'm invisible to men other than my hubby. I get street harassment on a daily basis and I don't think it's flattering or fun at all.. in fact it makes me feel threatened and like a target, which is why I have taken jujitsu for the last two years. I don't know if/when one of these jerks on the street will escalate from a hoot to something more violent.

    I look forward to the day where I can walk down the street or on my bike in peace.


    I'm sorry you have to deal with that nonsense. Honestly - what's the matter with some men? :angry4: I am annoyed on your behalf. Please be safe.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]2Poodles :flower: Southeast PA
    fine, med porosity, normal elasticity
    Currently using the following 2 - 3 x/week:
    Living Proof Perfect Hair Day suphate-free Poo, cone-free CO and styling treatment, plus KCCC

  • BekkaPooBekkaPoo EarthRegistered Users Posts: 3,861 Curl Neophyte
    2poodles wrote: »
    I'm sorry you have to deal with that nonsense. Honestly - what's the matter with some men? :angry4: I am annoyed on your behalf. Please be safe.

    Thank you 2poodles, and I definitely try to remain as safe as possible. I wish I knew what it was the drives men to be like that..do they think they own every woman?

    As to the article, we as women definitely need to be kinder to ourselves.. If I had 6 hours a day to work out, and had a crew of make up/hair people, a maid, a cook, and a butler, then yeah I might look like a supermodel..lol. But as it stands I AM the trainer, make up/hair crew, cook, and butler and proud of it. I might not look like a model, but that has never been my goal. I have many things in life to be proud of that don't revolve around my appearance (and no I don't think I'm ugly either).

    I've gotten to like how I look as I got older, so I take that as an accomplishment too.
    "The challenge is to be yourself in a world that is trying to make you like everybody else."
    "...rationality is not necessary to sell things.."
    My staples: Mane n Tail (cowash), Garnier Fructis Sleek n Shine (leave in condish), Grapeseed oil or shea butter (sealing), Organic Root Stimulator Elasticitea (leave-in condish & light hold)

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