Libido

ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
I'm 57 and for the past 2 years or so my libido has been pretty much non-existent. I love my husband and feel that sex is important in a marriage.

Can anyone recommend anything OTC to help? I've used testosterone, and it does help, but I was breaking out and getting chin hairs.
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Comments

  • anonymous_22139anonymous_22139 Registered Users Posts: 659 Curl Neophyte
    I'm 54 and I've had an extreme drop in my libido.

    I don't really care however. I'm just content without sex, like I was when I was a little kid.
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    Kitschy wrote: »
    I'm 54 and I've had an extreme drop in my libido.

    I don't really care however. I'm just content without sex, like I was when I was a little kid.

    Jus curious, are you married? If I was single I would be grateful for a low libido, I think.
  • anonymous_22139anonymous_22139 Registered Users Posts: 659 Curl Neophyte
    Yes, I'm married, for 27 years (I'm embarrassed because I've been saying 24 years on this site - when I finally did the math, I surprised myself!)

    My husband seems satisfied with my lower sex-drive. In the past, I had the higher sex drive anyway. I think he might be thankful that I'm no longer so demanding.

    We get together about once a month and I would be okay if it were less. It was three to four times a week when we were younger.

    My hubby is either:

    A: fine with it
    B: gettin' a little sumpin' sumpin' on the side
    C: taking matters into his own hands

    I doubt that he's having an affair because we work together and I know his schedule - there's simply no time. So I'd guess either A or B.
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    As long as you and your hubby are fine with it, that's all that matters. I am not happy about it and would like to find something to help.
  • anonymous_22139anonymous_22139 Registered Users Posts: 659 Curl Neophyte
    Have you tried reading erotic novels or porn?

    Get's me instantly in the mood.
  • hatingmyhairhatingmyhair Registered Users Posts: 15
    Maca root is from Peru, and it's good for lots of things. Energy, vitality, menopause discomfort, low sex drive, menstrual irregularity, and increasing fertility. My husband puts some in a smoothie everyday. It's supposed to readjust things at the cellular level, but I've always heard it takes a few weeks to work, so causing a period in three days is rare.

    I saw this post in another thread and thought maybe it might interest you???? Might be worth looking into.
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    Maca root is from Peru, and it's good for lots of things. Energy, vitality, menopause discomfort, low sex drive, menstrual irregularity, and increasing fertility. My husband puts some in a smoothie everyday. It's supposed to readjust things at the cellular level, but I've always heard it takes a few weeks to work, so causing a period in three days is rare.

    I saw this post in another thread and thought maybe it might interest you???? Might be worth looking into.

    Thanks. I'll google it.
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    Kitschy wrote: »
    Have you tried reading erotic novels or porn?

    Get's me instantly in the mood.

    I really dislike porn. I do like some erotica, especially tasteful pictures, but I don't want to have to pull out a book every time we want to make love.
  • SuburbanbushbabeSuburbanbushbabe Registered Users Posts: 15,402 Curl Neophyte
    If it weren't for bio-identical hormones I doubt I would have a sex drive. Perimenoposause and menopause happened and it seemd to disappear, along with mental focus. I'm use a blend (cream) of estrogen-testosterone-progesterone and have to remember to wash my hands before petting the cats or they get a dose too! I'm 57 and single/without a partner, but that sexual energy is very important for me to feel alive. Erotica helps too.
    My blog - http://suburbanbushbabe.wordpress.com/
    My FOTKI - http://whatsnew.fotki.com/suburbanbushbabe/
    comic-p.jpg

    Playing with my hair is a hobby. Fluffy, fine natural 4a. Goal= Healthy, beautiful hair that retains its length.
    Hear that crash? It's me falling off the CG wagon.
  • CurlswirlCurlswirl Registered Users Posts: 526
    Maybe it was my imagination but fish oil helped my libido a while back. That wasn't the reason I was taking it but I felt much more libido when I was on it. Perhaps try it, it is good for you anyway.
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    Curlswirl wrote: »
    Maybe it was my imagination but fish oil helped my libido a while back. That wasn't the reason I was taking it but I felt much more libido when I was on it. Perhaps try it, it is good for you anyway.

    I do take fish oil every day, I was even on prescription fish oil for a while.

    Suburbanbushbabe - I actually had an appointment to see a doctor about bio-identicals a while back, but I cancelled. Isn't it very expensive to do that? Does your insurance cover it? I have a PPO rather than a HMO, and it is mostly very good insurance. But I don't think they cover bio-identicals.
  • hatingmyhairhatingmyhair Registered Users Posts: 15
    sdc wrote: »
    Maca root is from Peru, and it's good for lots of things. Energy, vitality, menopause discomfort, low sex drive, menstrual irregularity, and increasing fertility. My husband puts some in a smoothie everyday. It's supposed to readjust things at the cellular level, but I've always heard it takes a few weeks to work, so causing a period in three days is rare.

    I saw this post in another thread and thought maybe it might interest you???? Might be worth looking into.

    Thanks. I'll google it.

    sdc,
    Did you google this? I was just wondering if you found out anything about it? Nevermind I looked it up and here is a link you might find interesting-you may have already seen it. http://www.macasex.com/. Interesting. It seems like it has a lot of beneficial uses.
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    I did google it and found it interesting. I think I will order 1 bottle from the site you listed and see. I read somewhere else yesterday that someone said not to do the full dosage right away, that it is better to build up to it. I think I will try that. Sometimes things affect me weirdly and I have to cut back or eliminate them. I'll let you know what I think in a month or so.

    sbb- I called my insurance company a few minutes ago and they do cover bio-identicals. I think I'll try the maca first and if I don't get any results from that I'll check bios out.
  • WileE-DeadWileE-Dead Banned Banned Users Posts: 24,963 Curl Neophyte
    How about a glass of wine to get things rolling? :happy3:
  • dc curlydc curly Registered Users Posts: 46
    I just read this study, and thought of this thread:

    June 29, 2010 — A new Endocrine Society scientific statement published in the July 2010 issue of the Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism evaluates benefits and risks for postmenopausal hormone replacement therapy (HRT), now known as menopausal hormone therapy (MHT). The statement, entitled "Postmenopausal Hormone Therapy: An Endocrine Society Scientific Statement," was also posted online ahead of print on June 21 and presented in San Diego, California, at ENDO 2010: The 92nd Annual Meeting & Expo.
    Although MHT was in widespread use in the 1990s in hopes of lowering cardiovascular disease risk as well as to treat menopausal symptoms, the Women's Health Initiative (WHI) Study showed that MHT was actually associated with an increased risk for heart disease, stroke, and breast cancer. However, recent evidence suggests that these risks may be affected by time after onset of menopause when MHT was started, a factor not considered in the WHI assessment of MHT safety and efficacy.
    "Before the WHI, MHT was believed to prevent heart disease, fractures, memory loss and dementia in addition to relieving uncomfortable menopausal symptoms," said task force chair Richard J. Santen, MD, professor of medicine at the University of Virginia in Charlottesville, in a news release. "Following the WHI reports of increased health risks associated with MHT, MHT use declined by 80%. New data however [show] that these health risks may not apply to all women using MHT, and that MHT may in fact be very beneficial to some women."
    Controversy regarding WHI's applicability to women just entering menopause stems from the fact that the average age of participants was 63 years, and only 3.5% of the women were aged 50 to 54 years, which is the age range when women typically decide whether to start MHT. Furthermore, the WHI did not address menopausal symptom relief. Therefore, this scientific statement considered new data from later studies evaluating the effects of MHT in women aged 50 to 55 years.
    Compared with women who begin MHT after age 60 years, those who begin MHT a short time after onset of menopause at ages 50 to 59 years appear to benefit. According to recent evidence, women in the short-time group using MHT for 5 years had a 30% to 40% reduction in mortality risk and no increased cardiovascular disease risk. In addition, they had a 90% decrease in hot flashes, overactive bladder, or other menopausal symptoms.
    "Some women in the short-time group still developed breast cancer but only with the combination of estrogen plus a progestogen, not with estrogen alone," Dr. Santen said. "This may be due to the stimulation and uncovering of very small, undiagnosed breast cancers, rather than causing these cancers de novo."
    Conclusions Reached
    Evaluation of the new data along with WHI evidence led the task force to reach the following conclusions, with level of evidence A:
    • "Standard-dose" estrogen used with or without a progestogen is associated with marked reduction in frequency and severity of hot flashes. For many women, lower doses of estrogen are also effective.
    • An alternative hormonal therapy for postmenopausal vasomotor symptoms is tibolone, which is widely available worldwide, but not in the United States.
    • For symptoms of vaginal atrophy, very low doses of vaginal estradiol are effective.
    • Symptoms of overactive bladder may be reduced by estrogen given vaginally or systemically.
    • Vaginal estrogen is associated with lower rates of recurrent urinary tract infections.
    • Tibolone improves urogenital atrophy.
    • For women in late postmenopause, estrogen given with or without a progestogen is as effective as bisphosphonate therapy for preventing early postmenopausal bone loss and increasing bone mass.
    • Use of estrogen alone and estrogen plus a progestogen is associated with a lower incidence of hip and vertebral fractures.
    • For osteoporotic women older than 60 years, tibolone is associated with significantly lower rates of vertebral and nonvertebral fractures.
    • Treatment with the selective estrogen receptor modulator raloxifene is associated with increased bone mineral density and lower rates of vertebral, but not hip, fractures.
    • Use of MHT containing estrogen plus a progestogen is linked to a lower risk for colon cancer.
    • Raloxifene is associated with a lower risk for breast cancer.
    • Mammographic density is increased in women taking estrogen alone or with a progestogen.
    • Use of tibolone is associated with a greater risk for breast cancer recurrence.
    • Sexual function is improved by physiologic amounts of transdermal testosterone, but not by dehydroepiandrosterone.
    • Risk for venothrombotic episodes is approximately doubled in women using MHT, and this risk is multiplicative with baseline risk factors such as age, increased body mass index, thrombophilias, surgery, and immobilization.
    • Use of raloxifene is associated with an increased incidence of venothrombotic episodes.
    • In older, but not younger, women, tibolone is associated with an increased risk for stroke.
    • Raloxifene is not associated with any increase in stroke risk.
    • In older women with preexisting vascular disease, hormone use does not reduce stroke incidence.
    • Although continuous estrogen plus a progestogen does not cause endometrial cancer, estrogen alone without a progestogen is associated with an increased incidence in endometrial cancer.
    • Tibolone is not associated with an increased incidence of endometrial hyperplasia or carcinoma.
    • Risk for gallbladder disease is increased in women using estrogen alone or with a progestogen.
    • MHT started after age 60 years does not improve memory.
    "It is important to remember that most women considering MHT are between the ages of 50 and 55 and in this group MHT may have many benefits," Dr. Santen concluded. "Physicians and their patients need to re-think the use of [MHT] based on data pertinent to the 50-55 year old and therapy should be individualized based on symptoms and underlying risks of breast cancer and heart disease."
    J Clin Endocrinol Metab. Published online June 21, 2010

    I know it's a whole lot of info, but wanted to share with you the effectiveness of transdermal testosterone. You don't say if you used topical test cream or took estratest or some other pill. Maybe transdermal would be the way to go. I really don't think there is anything effective OTC.

    I thought the whole study was interesting, seems like the whole HRT is bad for you is being rethought.

    Good luck!
  • SuburbanbushbabeSuburbanbushbabe Registered Users Posts: 15,402 Curl Neophyte
    sdc wrote: »
    Curlswirl wrote: »
    Maybe it was my imagination but fish oil helped my libido a while back. That wasn't the reason I was taking it but I felt much more libido when I was on it. Perhaps try it, it is good for you anyway.

    I do take fish oil every day, I was even on prescription fish oil for a while.

    Suburbanbushbabe - I actually had an appointment to see a doctor about bio-identicals a while back, but I cancelled. Isn't it very expensive to do that? Does your insurance cover it? I have a PPO rather than a HMO, and it is mostly very good insurance. But I don't think they cover bio-identicals.
    It's covered but I still pay $65 for a 4-5 week supply. I've been getting reimbursed for the copay through my FSA.
    My blog - http://suburbanbushbabe.wordpress.com/
    My FOTKI - http://whatsnew.fotki.com/suburbanbushbabe/
    comic-p.jpg

    Playing with my hair is a hobby. Fluffy, fine natural 4a. Goal= Healthy, beautiful hair that retains its length.
    Hear that crash? It's me falling off the CG wagon.
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    dc curly - That was a whole lot of info. I am 57 so not sure how I fit in (I didn't read every word). I had a partial hysterectomy several years ago so I'm not sure if I'm officially through menapause either.

    I've got the Maca and have taken for 2 days.
  • dc curlydc curly Registered Users Posts: 46
    Sorry, it was too long. I hope the maca root is effective. :flower:
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    dc curly wrote: »
    Sorry, it was too long. I hope the maca root is effective. :flower:

    No need to apologize. It made me less wary of trying other things if the Maca doesn't work.
  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Registered Users Posts: 9,777 Curl Virtuoso
    sdc, keep us updated. I'm interested also. I'm not sure if my libido is off or if its because I'm not around any attractive men.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • WileE-DeadWileE-Dead Banned Banned Users Posts: 24,963 Curl Neophyte
    I can fix that... :angel12:
  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Registered Users Posts: 9,777 Curl Virtuoso
    He wouldn't even get on the phone with me the other night. You are talking about your husband, right.:glasses1:
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
  • banjocurlbanjocurl Registered Users Posts: 1,031 Curl Connoisseur
    hmmm might check out the maca root thanks! my DH is a bit older and his libido is not much either but both of us still think about it and like to feel sexy. post meno brings all kinds of issues with it esp dryness which makes it tough.
    Susan suburban NY
    3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
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    PW: banjo
    HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    banjocurl wrote: »
    hmmm might check out the maca root thanks! my DH is a bit older and his libido is not much either but both of us still think about it and like to feel sexy. post meno brings all kinds of issues with it esp dryness which makes it tough.


    The dryness is a big problem. I've only had sex a handful of times in the past 2 years without lube. I hate that warming stuff from KY, it makes me burn. Hubby forgot and pulled it out last night without telling me, thinking the warming may help me enjoy it more. It didn't. :thumbdown:

    I'll report back on the Maca in a couple of weeks.
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    Lotsawaves wrote: »
    He wouldn't even get on the phone with me the other night. You are talking about your husband, right.:glasses1:

    LOL
  • WileE-DeadWileE-Dead Banned Banned Users Posts: 24,963 Curl Neophyte
    :angel9:
    He looked at me like I had 2 heads...
    tho last nite, I'm betting he would have...
    
    :occasion9:
  • WileE-DeadWileE-Dead Banned Banned Users Posts: 24,963 Curl Neophyte
    sdc wrote: »
    banjocurl wrote: »
    hmmm might check out the maca root thanks! my DH is a bit older and his libido is not much either but both of us still think about it and like to feel sexy. post meno brings all kinds of issues with it esp dryness which makes it tough.


    The dryness is a big problem. I've only had sex a handful of times in the past 2 years without lube. I hate that warming stuff from KY, it makes me burn. Hubby forgot and pulled it out last night without telling me, thinking the warming may help me enjoy it more. It didn't. :thumbdown:

    I'll report back on the Maca in a couple of weeks.
    What about regular KY? :dontknow:
  • ShrekLoverShrekLover Registered Users Posts: 2,551 Curl Neophyte
    Regular is fine. I don't know if that is the brand we reguraly use but we have both the regular (otherwise we would never have sex), and the warming. Time to throw the warming away I think.
  • anonymous_46846anonymous_46846 Banned Banned Users Posts: 160
    sdc wrote: »
    I'm 57 and for the past 2 years or so my libido has been pretty much non-existent. I love my husband and feel that sex is important in a marriage.

    Can anyone recommend anything OTC to help? I've used testosterone, and it does help, but I was breaking out and getting chin hairs.

    Libido is affected by diferent factors so it should be looked in a hollistic fashion.

    I would recommend you to obtain a blood sample testing for the different sex hormones (along with prolactin). This is very standard and a GP can issue one. I sincerely hope you had your testosterone use mediated by a doctor because use of testosterone in women can have detrimental AND irreversible effects. Testosterone treatment over the physiological range is not a long term sustainable idea.

    Neurotransmitters also play an influential role in libido so if your hormone panel gives an all clear, you should secondly look into the brain. Are you depressed? Are you using any medication? Even the so thought-of benign medication Benadryl can affect libido. Antidepressant are widely known for their anti-sexual effect although the atypical antidepressant Bupropion (brand name Wellbutrin) is hinted at improving libido in both men and women. Anyway, it would always be good to see a mental specialist if your hormones are OK.

    Lastly, and as it was mentioned by another user, for libido to be there you need stimulation. Bluntly put, a man which you do not find sexually appealing will not revv up your libido.

    In regards to what you can take to help libido there are a few things which MAY help. Zinc and magnesium can free some bound testosterone (make sure to choose a version which is not the oxide form), cholesterol and saturated fat intake will also raise testosterone (whole eggs are an excellent source) and upping your protein intake if you are deficient will do so too (for a healthy woman up to 100 grams is OK). Do not fall in the trap of testosterone-boosters for 99% of them are based on unfounded research/claims. Even Tribulus Terrestris has been debunked recently.

    Overall, I would suggest you see a doctor and go from there.

    Take care.

    Roy
  • LotsawavesLotsawaves Registered Users Posts: 9,777 Curl Virtuoso
    Hey ladies, we have a young stud here with a brain. I'm feeling my libido increasing. :headbang:

    On a serious note I agree with what Roy said about being with someone you're attracted to. I don't think that most of us. at this age anyway, just wake up horny and want a man, any man.

    Funny story....My bosses wife is a speech therapist. She has a room in our office, so I see her patients. There is this man, mid 30's, very attractive, who was robbed and shot in the head and left for dead. He survived, but has trouble walking and can't talk. He just makes noises.

    So, he was in the office with a relative waiting for his session. He started doing his mouth exercises. One of them was very similar to kissing. I couldn't take my eyes off of him. It was so sexy. I could feel things stirring.

    That pretty much told me that it isn't me. It's the old, fat, ugly men in my age bracket that is turning me off.
    From Michael Berg:

    Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."

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