Help With Daughters EXTREMELY Dry Hair

BxChick1230BxChick1230 Posts: 22Registered Users
So my 3.5 year old has very curly hair, but its so dry its frustrating... i usually just keep it in like 4 braided pony tails... but i'd love to be able to let it loose or a least loose pony tails. I believe her hair is a 4a by the photos of everyone else. I usually have to drench her hair in gel by parting it into many different sections, but like 4 hours later it looks dry and frizzy. only the ends maintain the curls but the first 3/4 of her hair its like a fro. her hair is also really thin, when her hair comes out by combing it, if i roll it, its almost like a cotton ball, and hair gets VERY linty around the edges of the scrunchy.
also her hair is a NIGHTMARE to detangle, the moment i detangle a section and go to the next, its already tangled again.. and she spends the entire time screaming. Her hair is super long, the photo of her hair extended now reaches almost the top of her bum, but when curly barely passes her shoulders.

Anyways, i am lost with all the products they have out there, and the kids stuff just doesnt touch her hair.. I'd love some recomendations.. i dont think her hair breaks off easily even though its thin i think its fairly strong, so im not worried about using adult products.


being straighten, the right side is what her hair usually looks like when dry, though here it is still wet
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Her hair while wet and full of gel... a year ago

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Comments

  • LadyV69LadyV69 Posts: 3,397Registered Users
    If you're putting in gel without any leave in conditioner under it and/or an oil with it, it will leave the hair dry. Most gels don't have moisturizing properties. In fact, they contain alcohols which dry out the hair. Do you use any leave-ins?

    Also, when you detangle her hair, don't do it on dry hair and use a wide tooth comb or a Denman. It's a good idea to twist or braid it immediately afterward so that it can be stretched and won't tangle back up.
    Fine haired, low density, highly porous curly kinky lady
    Last relaxer: Not sure. 3/08 or 4/08
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    Leave-In: KCKT, Giovanni Direct Leave-In, CJ Smoothing Lotion
    Stylers: ORS Twist and Loc Gel, KCCC, Ecostyler, SheaMoisture Deep Treatment Masque
    Deep Conditioner: DevaCurl Heaven In Hair, CJ Deep Fix

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  • The New BlackThe New Black Posts: 16,754Registered Users Curl Connoisseur
    An avocado mask?

    Sealing?

    HEHH to co-wash and as a leave in?
    montage-3.gif No MAS.

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  • EllyEllyOxenFreeEllyEllyOxenFree Posts: 6,446Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    What a cutie! Get her some Qhemet Burdock Root Butter Cream and put that under the gel...also, what kind of gel are you using? If it has alcohol it's going to dry her hair out like crazy. Long Aid is my favorite drugstore gel.
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  • NikG20NikG20 Posts: 461Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    She's sooo adorable! Beautiful hair.

    I think it would be helpful to know what kind of products you use on her hair. Shampoo, conditioner, moisturizer, styler, etc. You said kid products don't touch her hair, which ones have you tried? How exactly are you detangling her hair?

    LadyV gave good advice about twisting/braiding it so it doesn't tangle back up. I do this while I'm washing and detangling my daughters hair. You can read a bit about that here:
    http://beadsbraidsbeyond.blogspot.com/2009/10/as-routine.html

    But it sounds like you would like for her to wear her natural curls out like in the second picture. I believe the hair is going to get a little tangled regardless of what product you use. It will be easier to detangle well moisturized hair though. The key is removing the tangles properly instead of ripping through them with a comb. I personally finger comb my daughters hair first and remove any tangles with my fingers, etc etc.

    Ok I don't mean to ramble. You have gotten some good advice so far. I'll check back to later to see if you added any more info.

    Good luck!
    Hz5exYvWIb4
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  • *Marah**Marah* Posts: 8,032Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    LOL! I know I am like a broken record.. but conditioner and oil .. conditioner and oil. LOL! I say get a good moisturizing conditioner and actually LEAVE IT IN then seal the hair with an oil like olive, coconut, safflower, sunflower, castor, etc.

    I've got naturally dry hair too :angry7:... and I've found the best method for me is apply a moisturizing conditioner to my wet hair and seal it with a combination of olive and castor oil (I use other oils at times to but that combo is my main preference).

    You also might want to be careful about loading her hair with gel especially if the gel has silicones and or alcohol in it..she could be getting build up on her hair shaft which is making her hair drier. And you have to be careful with products that contain mineral oil and petroleum too. I avoid products like that like the plague.

    And if her hair is not particularly porous which I doubt it is since she's so young.. you have to find ways to open her hair shaft and get moisture in. One way to do that is warm water (if you don't wash her hair everyday) in a spray bottle..saturate her hair, apply the moisturizing conditioner, and then the oil to seal it. Let it air dry.

    Also you could see if you can sometimes wrap a warm moist towel around her head for a while to open up the hair shaft and as soon as you take it off..get that conditioner on there and seal it with the oil.

    Anyway.. my favorite moisturizing conditioner is Garnier Fructis Cream Fortifying Conditioner. It works like a miracle on my hair. And I rarely use stylers like gels. All I do to my hair daily is co-wash, rinse that out, apply the Garnier I mentioned above or Tresseme Naturals conditioner and I do not rinse that out, and seal my hair with an oil of my choice. I let it air dry. My current choice of oil is a clear squirt bottle I bought that I put half castor oil and half olive oil in.

    My hair stays moisturized all day and I have no frizz once my hair is dry. It's a tried and true method that a few of us use here..and it works!

    Also.. I wonder if you ever tried the Curls line ? They have a childrens line that may work on your child's hair..

    http://www.curls.biz/curly-hair-products/curly-hair-products-curly-q-for-kids.html
    tumblr_m9jonzYZmu1re7hjjo1_250.jpg
  • CocoTCocoT Posts: 5,330Registered Users
    Just some tips:
    If the hair is hard to detangle, make sure you're using conditioner and don't be stingy. BUT if you're able to get your hands on some Qhemet Biologics cocoa tree detangling ghee, get it! It's really good. It made my hair really soft.
    It would be more helpful to give you hints on the buildup/lint if you told us what you were using. The products you may be using are probably too heavy for her fine hair, making lint more susceptible to stick to it. Or maybe you're not washing it enough.
    Another detangling tip is to do it in sections and twist or braid the section you're done detangling and then move on. Dont detangle and just leave the hair open because (assuming you do it when its damp, wet or with conditioner) shrinkage will occur and the hair will tangle upon itself.
    When combing, make sure you are doing it gently from tip to root. Start at the bottom and work your way up. You'll probably be surprised at how little amount of hair would come out when you're not using unnecessary force or what-have-you. You will also be hurting her less.
    The dryness may be due to the gel. What type of gel are you using? Look at the ingredients. The only product you mentioned was gel so if that's all you're using then dry hair is inevitable. You need a moisturizer.

    That's all I have right now. :)
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  • hippychichippychic Posts: 4,673Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    she's a little cutie! :)

    i'd nix the gel.

    my toddler (2) has strands a little finer but here is what i use for her:

    i mist her hair with aloe vera juice & water (morning and night), then apply unrefined shea butter (morning only with styling). she doesn't get 'out' styles because it leads to a mass of tangled hair. her hair is arm pit length stretched.

    her hair loves the qhemet's burdock root AND the amla oil heavy cream but since i have greater access to unrefined shea butter, i stick with that one the most. another product that works great on her hair is hawaiian silky 14 n 1 spray. it contains mineral oil but no silicones. this removes any tangles very easily. every now and again, i use a leave-in (oyin honey hemp) and shea butter. her hair also likes the ohm sweet hair pudding.

    she gets her hair washed weekly with curls shampoo and conditioner (from target) to get rid of any build-up. she is modified cg (like me) so i don't use silicones on her hair.
    LOIS (OS); cottony, TYPE 4 hair, fine/med strands; no cones bcz my hair hates them; last relaxer '98; now low porosity:?, ignores most natural hair rules; BC #8

    faves: suave, v05 shampoo, conditioner (my own), raw shea butter, castor oil, peanut oil, aloe juice
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  • BxChick1230BxChick1230 Posts: 22Registered Users
    yea honestly, i just buy any gel i can find.. oopps.. i also just buy the cheapest conditioner, double ooppss.. i have a really hard time making decisions when it comes to choosing things, so i usually just take the easiest way out as i get too overwhelmed by the options...

    i do detangle her hair while wet with conditioner, but it just feels so dry and it sucks up the water right away.

    i live in nyc and here in harlem theres always tons of container of shea butter and cocoa butter being sold by the african street vendors, is that what you guys refer to as unrefined, or is it different.
  • hippychichippychic Posts: 4,673Registered Users Curl Neophyte
    yea honestly, i just buy any gel i can find.. oopps.. i also just buy the cheapest conditioner, double ooppss.. i have a really hard time making decisions when it comes to choosing things, so i usually just take the easiest way out as i get too overwhelmed by the options...

    i do detangle her hair while wet with conditioner, but it just feels so dry and it sucks up the water right away.

    i live in nyc and here in harlem theres always tons of container of shea butter and cocoa butter being sold by the african street vendors, is that what you guys refer to as unrefined, or is it different.
    yes that's the same shea butter
    all gels/conditioners are NOT created equal :disgust:
    LOIS (OS); cottony, TYPE 4 hair, fine/med strands; no cones bcz my hair hates them; last relaxer '98; now low porosity:?, ignores most natural hair rules; BC #8

    faves: suave, v05 shampoo, conditioner (my own), raw shea butter, castor oil, peanut oil, aloe juice
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
  • earth218earth218 Posts: 47Registered Users
    Oh, she is adorable! So I put coconut oil on my daughter hair as a pre-poo then I shampoo with the SheaMoisture Curly hair shampoo, then detangle with Nature's Gate Organic conditioner with olive or grape seed oil on top of that detangle some more if necessary after it has sat for a while. After rinsing, we do a cold water rinse then leave in on soaking wet hair and oil on top of that. I try to style in a way that makes it easy for me to undo and moisturize every morning. So every morning I use a little of the Nature's Gate conditioner and either castor oil or coconut oil. Her hair is kind of sandy brown and sucks up a lot of moisture and it doesn't reflect light very well so I like to keep it well moisturized. I hope this helps you some!

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