My niece is jealous of my new daughter

Jess2316Jess2316 Registered Users Posts: 617
My niece Preslie is starting to be jealous of my daughter Avery. She loves Avery and wants to talk and play with her but then suddenly she'll do or say something that you know she's getting jealous, just yesterday we were changing Avery's diaper (Pres LOVES the poopy ones, don't ask me why) and suddenly Pres said "you don't love me anymore, you just love Avery"

Of course I told her there was no way that was true and I sat down next to her and hugged her and gave her a kiss and told her I love her very much, she kinda put her head down and said "ok" real quiet. Almost broke my heart

I've been trying to pay special attention to Preslie, letting her help with Avery when she wants to and trying to ask her questions and have her show me things..but is there anything else that helps?
3a fine hair (I think)

CoN poo and Biolage Conditioning Balm
I love CK and B&A gel...I like HETT Mousse

Comments

  • CGNYCCGNYC Registered Users Posts: 4,938 Curl Connoisseur
    It doesn't sound like she's jealous, it sounds like she just wants to know her place in things is still secure. Was she the only grandchild in the family till now? It's a big shift to go from being the special one in the family to having to wait your turn for attention from the adults.
  • Jess2316Jess2316 Registered Users Posts: 617
    CGNYC wrote: »
    It doesn't sound like she's jealous, it sounds like she just wants to know her place in things is still secure. Was she the only grandchild in the family till now? It's a big shift to go from being the special one in the family to having to wait your turn for attention from the adults.

    That was just one thing, she's been doing other things that I would classify as jealousy.

    She was the only grandchild till now, and yes the center of attention! I know she'll be fine, I just feel bad for her
    3a fine hair (I think)

    CoN poo and Biolage Conditioning Balm
    I love CK and B&A gel...I like HETT Mousse
  • RedCatWavesRedCatWaves Registered Users Posts: 31,259 Curl Connoisseur
    Give her lots of positive attention and praise for helping with the baby and make time to point out advantages of being a big girl versus being a baby. I used to point out how the baby was missing doing this or that because babies are too small to have ice cream or go to sleepovers at grandma's or whatever, because older kids generally only notice things that affect themselves, not anyone else. I wanted to be sure they noticed that the baby doesn't get everything.

    Kids are usually better off in the long run for having siblings and cousins, so don't feel too badly for her. She'll be fine. She and her cousin will be great friends just as soon as the baby gets mobile.
  • nynaeve77nynaeve77 Registered Users Posts: 7,135 Curl Novice
    Give her lots of positive attention and praise for helping with the baby and make time to point out advantages of being a big girl versus being a baby. I used to point out how the baby was missing doing this or that because babies are too small to have ice cream or go to sleepovers at grandma's or whatever, because older kids generally only notice things that affect themselves, not anyone else. I wanted to be sure they noticed that the baby doesn't get everything.

    Kids are usually better off in the long run for having siblings and cousins, so don't feel too badly for her. She'll be fine. She and her cousin will be great friends just as soon as the baby gets mobile.

    I could've written this post, so thanks for doing it for me, RCW! I have to do this with my daughter. She loves her little brother, but she sometimes has a hard time waiting her turn for things (or even realizing that mommy needs quiet time for a little bit). I make a time for her every day that's just about us. With your niece, maybe you could take her out for ice cream or do something special that's just about you and her. I'm sure she is missing her one-on-one time with her auntie. I know it's hard with a new baby, though.
    "Maybe Lucy's right. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Browniest."--Linus, A Charlie Brown Christmas


    My fotki: http://public.fotki.com/nynaeve77/
    Password: orphanannie

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