"you look prettier with straight hair!"

sachi106sachi106 Registered Users Posts: 10 Curl Novice
I've straightend my hair about two times this year just to see what it looks like, and when i went to school SO many people told me i look prettier with it straight.

That REALLY makes me mad when people say that. Its the exact same thing as saying someone isn't pretty because of the colour of their skin. So my curly hair is nasty and i look ugly with it curly?

Grrrrrrrr it makes me soooo mad! :angry8:
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Comments

  • OperaDivaOperaDiva Registered Users Posts: 354
    My husband actually told me that the other day, so I feel your pain! I still don't even know how to react to that, except to tell him that he married a curly girl and I'm not about to change that, especially now that I know how to keep it curly and healthy!

    I think I can at least get him to be ok with my curls as long as I try to grow my hair out, he loves it long and I've had it short for a while because I couldn't get my pre-CG hair to curl when it's long.
    Jessica, proud mama to Hunter (9-18-09)
    3a/F/ii, high porosity

    Products
    Co-wash: Suave Naturals Tropical Coconut, V05 Volumizing
    Conditioner: AOGPB, Garnier Sleek and Shine
    Leave in: Suave Naturals Tropical coconut
    Gel: LA Looks Mega hold, Ecostyler Black, SOTC with shea butter/cocoa butter/sweet almond oil
    Off-day spritz: Lavender mist
    Hair likes Obscene amounts of protein
    Hair dislikes
    Too much oil

    http://public.fotki.com/OperaTeacherMom/hair-going-cg/


    CG since 5/8/10
  • anniemaeanniemae Registered Users Posts: 1,702 Curl Neophyte
    Don't worry about what others say. What matters is what you want. I've always felt that I just look better with straight hair, and I wore it straight all the time as I got older. When I grew up (way back when - hee hee), everyone had straight hair. So, I always felt like the odd man out. Nowadays, I like it curly because I know how to style it now - I really didn't know what I was doing before. Actually, some people really think it's unique and "cool" to have curly hair. Most of my friends with straight hair hate their hair now that they are older and can't do a thing with it.

    I like mine wurly/curly now because I can still change it up once in a while. I can wear it both ways. :) As long as you feel comfortable with it curly, then do what you want and not what others think.

    :)
    Hair Type - wavy/curly, fine texture, thin/medium density
    2b-c/F/ii
    :dog:
  • wavyblondewavyblonde Registered Users Posts: 1,637 Curl Neophyte
    Okay, I'll be honest and say that I do think that there are people who look prettier with straight hair, even if their curly hair is really pretty on its own. It's not curly hair discrimination, necessarily--straight hair just looks better with their features. (I am not saying you do, b/c I don't know you, just a general thing I've noticed.)

    I've also seen curly girls who seem to lose all their uniqueness when they straighten. Annalynne McCord, for one.
    2c/3a with 2b underlayer. Fine, porous. Loves protein. But not hydrolized wheat protein. Yuck.

    Wash: WEN Sweet Almond Mint or Pomegranate
    Gels: LA Looks Sport Gel
    Mousse: Tigi Catwalk Curlesque
    Curling creams/gellies: Coffee Coco Curling Cream Lite, Spiral Solutions Curl Enhancing Jelly, Curls Gel-les'c
    SOTC: JC N&S (LOVE)
    http://public.fotki.com/wavyblonde/hair-2010/
  • jonquiljonquil Registered Users Posts: 94
    sachi106 wrote: »
    That REALLY makes me mad when people say that. Its the exact same thing as saying someone isn't pretty because of the colour of their skin. So my curly hair is nasty and i look ugly with it curly?

    I think this might be a slight over-reaction. Could it simply be because people aren't used to seeing your hair straight? If you were to straighten it everyday and then wear it curly I'm sure people would say your hair looked beautiful :)

    Or another example is if u wore jeans everyday and then one day come in a dress - if people complement you it would be because the dress is a novelty, not because jeans don't suit you. Make sense? lol
  • tasnimroxmysoxtasnimroxmysox Registered Users Posts: 3
    OMG people do this to me too!! last year, i used to straighten my hair, and because people said it looked nicer i carried on straightening it. but that made it sooo unhealthy so i had to stop. now my hair is healthy and curly and people always tell me that i should straighten my hair because it suits me and it looks pretty. they don't understand why that upsets me. :(
  • freakNpinkfreakNpink Registered Users Posts: 20
    GRRRRRRR! I know that feeling all too well.. I actually dated this idiot a long time ago and I straightened my hair for our first date and when I didn't do it again for a few more dates after he asked me why I never did that because my hair looked so good the nite. Also the few times I wore it to work straight I got lots of complements when I never did natural..I'm glad my bf Ive been w/ for 2 years now loves my hair..he's actually told me he loves when I wake up, it's all wild and looks like I have dreads forming. lol! that really makes me laugh..
    Baby, I look like an outlaw
  • makeupjunkiemakeupjunkie Registered Users Posts: 4
    I've been facing this issue as well and it's SERIOUSLY pissing me off:angry5:. Both my mom and I stopped flat ironing our hair around the same time, but I get wayyyy more crap from people. I don't know if it's because my hair is curlier (my mom's like a 2a/b) or what. My closest cousin who used to say they LOVED curly hair, is now asking why I never flat iron mine anymore. When I respond saying that it was really unhealthy and damaging to my curls, I'm then told "well at least it looked cute when you straightened it". So I'm left completely baffled like are you trying to say it isn't cute now??? And one of my other cousins who also is a curly, has gone in the complete opposite direction. She used to wear her hair curly alllllll the time and now she straightens it continuously. When she noticed that I was sticking with my curls, she asked me when was I going to get over this and start flat ironing again. Like literally EVERY time I see her, she brings up the fact that I "need" to flat iron my hair. When I ask if she's trying to hint that it doesn't look good on me, she says "no not at all, you just need to straighten it though". I really don't get these people. I'm like the more everyone questions me about my curly'ness, the more I'm never flat ironing again hahahah. Luckily my guy loves my hair crazy curly and wild.
    3a/b/c
    Current products are:
    Yes to Carrots co
    Tresseme Naturals co as a leave in
    Shea Moisture spray

    Sometimes I throw some KCCC in
  • jonquiljonquil Registered Users Posts: 94
    Lol makeupjunkie as if someone could have curls like yours and not be cute? They are just jealous, that's all. Its like 'friends' trying to tempt you from a diet to make themselves feel better for being overweight :icescream:
  • IrisChacon1984IrisChacon1984 Registered Users Posts: 158
    One of my guy friends from High School told me this while we were texting each other the other day and boy did it piss me off!
    Last Perm: August 2007
    BC: June 21st 2008,
    3C/4A Thick Curly/Kinky texture, low porosity

    Products:
    Pre-Poo - EVOO
    Poo- Creme of Nature (Red Label), KCCC
    Cowash - HEHH & HENOYF, Aussie Moist
    DT- Herbal Essence Hydraliscious Reconditioning Conditioner
    Leave in-KCKT, KBBHM (EM)
    Moisturizer: OHM Frank Juice, KBBHB (VL)
    Oil: Coconut Oil, Olive Oil
    Styling: KCCC, QBOHHB.

    http://public.fotki.com/ShiraLaCocolita/

  • makeupjunkiemakeupjunkie Registered Users Posts: 4
    Thanks _jonquil_ :toothy10:

    I'm definitely learning to ignore what everyone says. All that matters is I like it. Plus it helps that I went to Madusalon (which by the way they're completely AMAZING) today with my mom while she got her devacut and her stylist like completely flipped out about me having corkscrew curls and saying it looked really pretty. Totally made my day. It made up for all the crap I've been getting from everyone.
    3a/b/c
    Current products are:
    Yes to Carrots co
    Tresseme Naturals co as a leave in
    Shea Moisture spray

    Sometimes I throw some KCCC in
  • ResRes Registered Users Posts: 2,911
    I'm sorry you are told this! It sucks. I bet you look great both ways.

    Honestly, for me, I feel prettier with straight hair. =/
    3A/B - low-normal porosity - med to coarse texture

    Shampoo - GTTTT
    Co-Wash - As I Am Coconut Cowash
    RO - GVP Cond. Balm, Tresemme Naturals, Yes to Carrots Nourishing, AO Honeysuckle Rose
    LI - Hollywood Beauty Olive Cream Headdress
    DT - Hollywood Beauty Olive Cholestrol, SM Raw Shea Butter Deep Treatment
    Stylers - BRHG (old formula is my HG, but the new one has silicones)

    Trying out - MGA Sculpting Gel, LA Sports Gel, Got2b Spiked Gel, Got2b Glued
  • curlyfoolcurlyfool Registered Users Posts: 2
    I know what you mean.
    When I first started CG and my hair had just dried, my cousin came over and when I walked in the room, one of the first things he said was, "Wow... you really need a straightner.."
    I was pretty pissed but I got over it. I love my curls and no one can change that!

    Something I noticed about these posts is that most of you have guys who like you the way you are! ;)
  • marinacurlzmarinacurlz Registered Users Posts: 1,720
    "Open Mouth. Insert Foot." :tongue3: I think what people mean to say is that it makes us curly gals look more polished.
    http://public.fotki.com/TLGuerrero/

    password: curly

    3B w/3A underneath

    Medium texture
    Average porosity

    Crazy-picky hair; likes some oils and proteins, but not others, can tolerate some glycerin.

    Current products-
    Co-wash: Suave/Vo5/TJ Refresh
    Rinse out & Leave in: Suave Tropical Coconut/Garnier Triple Nutrition
    Gel: Herbal Essences Set Me Up/Aussie Tizz No Frizz
  • ResRes Registered Users Posts: 2,911
    I was told my straight hair is sexier. =/
    3A/B - low-normal porosity - med to coarse texture

    Shampoo - GTTTT
    Co-Wash - As I Am Coconut Cowash
    RO - GVP Cond. Balm, Tresemme Naturals, Yes to Carrots Nourishing, AO Honeysuckle Rose
    LI - Hollywood Beauty Olive Cream Headdress
    DT - Hollywood Beauty Olive Cholestrol, SM Raw Shea Butter Deep Treatment
    Stylers - BRHG (old formula is my HG, but the new one has silicones)

    Trying out - MGA Sculpting Gel, LA Sports Gel, Got2b Spiked Gel, Got2b Glued
  • dannysgirl777dannysgirl777 Registered Users Posts: 70
    I think it has something to do with the newness of it. I think if you straightened it daily, and then wore it curly, people would say the same thing about it being prettier curly.

    I get that all the time too...the thing that bothers me is how it is said. I HATE when people say that I look better with straight hair. I usually reply "do you think god was wrong then?" People hate that!!! This is how my hair is, so people can just get over it! My 5 year old tells me everyday that he wants my hair flat. My husband has always loved my curls, so that's good ;)
    ~Kristen
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]<<-working my way back to this!!
    My hair when I was 17 and had no idea how to flatten it.
  • dannysgirl777dannysgirl777 Registered Users Posts: 70
    I feel sexier/prettier with it straight!! I figure, I will reserve that for the nights I want to feel sexier!
    Residual wrote: »
    I'm sorry you are told this! It sucks. I bet you look great both ways.

    Honestly, for me, I feel prettier with straight hair. =/
    ~Kristen
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]<<-working my way back to this!!
    My hair when I was 17 and had no idea how to flatten it.
  • murrrcatmurrrcat Registered Users Posts: 9,596
    I think it has something to do with the newness of it. I think if you straightened it daily, and then wore it curly, people would say the same thing about it being prettier curly.

    I get that all the time too...the thing that bothers me is how it is said. I HATE when people say that I look better with straight hair. I usually reply "do you think god was wrong then?" People hate that!!! This is how my hair is, so people can just get over it! My 5 year old tells me everyday that he wants my hair flat. My husband has always loved my curls, so that's good ;)

    I agree, I when I was obessed with having straight tresses, I once wore it curly and everyone was in an uproar for me to NEVER EVER straighten it again.

    And then I was around people who've only seen me curly and I had it straight for a wedding and they were like 'omg your hair looks so pretty!" So its really just about looking different from the norm, if I put red streaks in someone would probably say "omg i love your hair" It doesn't mean they hate your hair normally its just that you changed it so they find it different and then they actually notice it.
    tumblr_mji9u1Fwza1rh1wv4o1_500.jpg
  • annamalousannamalous Registered Users Posts: 3
    i get this too, sometimes. the thing is, i used to straighten my hair almost every day... so on the rare occasions that i left it natural, everyone told me i should do that more often. it's probably just the change and keeping it mixed up that they like. :)
  • rizosmiosrizosmios Registered Users Posts: 12
    Up until about 3 years ago I consistently straightened my hair, only letting it go natural at the beach, or for like 3 humid summer days (i know, ridiculous). So for a total of 1 week, i had curly hair and received so many compliments. But at the time, my hair was so damaged from sulfates and consistent flat ironing ....so damaged. Granted, growing up my mom taught me to keep my hair short so that the straightening time would be shorter, since she too preferred my hair straight, so it was basically a curly poof ball...

    I think the change in my perception came when I started noticing more people with curly hair and something clicked, but I wanted to embrace what was natural (my dad loves curly hair, since he has curly hair, and he always said that curly hair how I was intended to look :wink:).

    For a year I exemplified what a PJ is and I thought I had a good routine until i found this site and the CG routine. Got my first Deva cut in spring of 09. I still straightened my hair about twice a month, because I too used to think that I could only be really pretty, polished, and sexy with straight hair.

    This past Feb, I straightened my hair, and when I was done (after 1.5 hours) i realized that my hair was boring and I wanted it curly. That was the 1st time I have ever felt like this....EVER!

    I realized that I had tried to be unique my whole life, but in the one way that I could be unique naturally, I had been rejecting.

    So, since Feb I have not straightened my hair!! :hello1: Only complaint is I wish it was longer, but I will get there (currently length between shoulder and BSL)

    In April, I finally went CG and my hair has been soft, shiny and curly. I get compliments all the time from people out and about. My family can't believe how healthy my hair looks.

    I know its hard when the media shows only a certain type of pretty, but girls with doubts, STOP! Everyone's curly hair that I have seen on this site is beautiful!
    **CG since 4/2010**
    Mostly 3b, w/bits of 3c, normal porosity, good elasticity, med texture

    Cowash: Suave Naturals Coconut or Just water wash.
    Condish: YTT
    Leave-in: YTT, KCKT, EV coconut oil, jojoba oil, raw whipped shea butter
    Styler: FSG(with honey, rosemary EO, EV coconut oil, jojoba oil) AVG, HESMU, BRHG
    Baking soda cowash + ACV rinses

  • rizosmiosrizosmios Registered Users Posts: 12
    :mrgreen:
    **CG since 4/2010**
    Mostly 3b, w/bits of 3c, normal porosity, good elasticity, med texture

    Cowash: Suave Naturals Coconut or Just water wash.
    Condish: YTT
    Leave-in: YTT, KCKT, EV coconut oil, jojoba oil, raw whipped shea butter
    Styler: FSG(with honey, rosemary EO, EV coconut oil, jojoba oil) AVG, HESMU, BRHG
    Baking soda cowash + ACV rinses

  • currlyQ4dayscurrlyQ4days Registered Users Posts: 123
    I think it has something to do with the newness of it. I think if you straightened it daily, and then wore it curly, people would say the same thing about it being prettier curly.

    I get that all the time too...the thing that bothers me is how it is said. I HATE when people say that I look better with straight hair. I usually reply "do you think God was wrong then?" People hate that!!! This is how my hair is, so people can just get over it! My 5 year old tells me everyday that he wants my hair flat. My husband has always loved my curls, so that's good ;)

    I LOVE THAT RESPONSE!! but yes, some people just feel like they need to give their opinion on everything! Grrr, it's so annoying isn't it?
    • 3c & 3b, Normal Porosity, Very Very Coarse and Protein Sensitive
    • Shampoo: Deva Curl No Poo, Kinky Curly Come Clean
    • Conditioner: Deva Curl One, Castor Oil,
    • Styling: Expiramenting with FSG

    "Time to own this poodle!!!"
  • floridacurlygirlfloridacurlygirl Registered Users Posts: 28
    Some people tell me they like it better straight, some like it curly better. I can tell you most people like that it is different than usual. Also, people get jealous of our hair.

    Once I even had my hair dresser tell me my friends told me to wear my hair straight because they were jealous ( this was in highschool), and she refused to straighten my hair bc she thought it was beautiful.

    Now that I am older peple compliment my hair much more when it is curly than stick straight. My hair is I think 3b, 3a.

    Also, if they do like my straight hair it is when it is just "wavy" like done with curling iron. Most people do not like my hair when it is stick straight...it takes away from my look..makes me look not as different.
  • greydovefeatherwinggreydovefeatherwing Registered Users Posts: 12
    i didn't intend to do this, but when I was out on a date I tested the guy and asked him whether he liked my hair curly or straight (as I was wearing it that night and he'd only seen me with curly up til then)

    He said straight.....and I have to admit this caused me to take a point away from him. I'm horrible, I know! :laughing1:
  • AmazinnaturalAmazinnatural Registered Users Posts: 755
    I think CURLY HAIR, is gorgeous!!!! I think that people make those general statements because they are ignorant to individualism!:cussing: Everybody don't have to have they're hair straightened to look beautiful, sexier, etc. If people didn't focus on what the mass majority was doing maybe the could embrace they're natural beauty as well. We CGs embrace our natural curls and kinks! Don't focus on the negativity, what we are doing is a wonderful thing!:thumbright:



    event.png


    Still loving my curls and kinks!
    Products I love:
    Ion Dandruff/Seborrheic Dermatitis Tar Shampoo
    Suave Shea Butter Conditioner
    Biolage Scalp Therapy Shampoo
    Biolage Fortify Therapy Shampoo
    Trader Joe's Tea Tree Tingle Conditioner
    Beautiful Textures Rapid Repair Deep Conditioner
    Shea butter, olive oil, coconut oil, apricot oil, peppermint oil, tea tree oil, and eucalyptus oil
  • LexLionessLexLioness Registered Users Posts: 70
    rizosmios wrote: »
    This past Feb, I straightened my hair, and when I was done (after 1.5 hours) i realized that my hair was boring and I wanted it curly. That was the 1st time I have ever felt like this....EVER!

    The last time I straightened my hair (which must have been the beginning of June) I felt the same exact way. It was so different for me, because I had always thought I looked better with straight hair but now I just think it's boring.
    type 3a/b, baby fine to medium, normal to high porosity except the canopy which is high.
    -
    recently chopped off about 4" - HOW LIBERATING!!! Learning to love my hair again instead of hating it for being a knotty mess.
  • starsinmypocketstarsinmypocket Registered Users Posts: 6
    I get this sometimes. I used to wear my hair strait about half the time and curly about half the time, so I get a little both ways. I think people are just taken with the "difference" of how your hair looks. I know most guys (in my experience) like strait hair simply because they can put their fingers in it. Most women like curly hair. But if you always wear your hair curly then straiten it one day, people will say they like your hair better strait. But Im willing to bet you, if you were to wear your hair strait alot, then wear it curly, people will say they like your hair better curly. They just like CHANGE. So dont take it too personally.
    3a, 3b CG... and seems to get curlier every day.
  • happycurls24happycurls24 Registered Users Posts: 263
    I used to get offended by this as well but then I realized that the reason people were saying I looked more attractive was probably because I felt more attractive.
    I had always felt like my hair was big, poofy and frizzy and I never wore it down because I feared people would think I looked like a chia pet. I live in a small New England town where EVERYONE has straight hair and many actually think brushing my hair would make it less frizzy???????
    Before I embraced my curls I straightened it a lot and I felt beautiful and confident and I think people could see that I felt good about myself.
    Now I have embraced my curls and when I straighten my hair people tell me they like it better curly and I would have to agree.
    Hair Type: 3b /3a?.... medium texture, normal porosity:afro:

    Conditioner:
    Aussie Moist


    Shampoo: Organix Shampoo

    Other products: Paul Mitchell Sculpting Foam Mousse, LA looks Sport gel, & whatever is cheapest for a frizz serum.



    :blob:
  • aishamodelaishamodel Registered Users Posts: 136
    Sometimes I really just think it's because it's a new look. Like if you wore your hair straight all the time, the day you wear it curly everyone says "oh you look so pretty, much better curly"

    I feel like curly hair makes me look younger and more sweet. Straight hair, I feel sexy and more stylish
    4a-4b hair. Not sure yet so I'll just say both!
  • GirlWithUkuleleGirlWithUkulele Registered Users Posts: 150
    I get this sometimes. I used to wear my hair strait about half the time and curly about half the time, so I get a little both ways. I think people are just taken with the "difference" of how your hair looks. I know most guys (in my experience) like strait hair simply because they can put their fingers in it. Most women like curly hair. But if you always wear your hair curly then straiten it one day, people will say they like your hair better strait. But Im willing to bet you, if you were to wear your hair strait alot, then wear it curly, people will say they like your hair better curly. They just like CHANGE. So dont take it too personally.

    Well said :)
    Victoria, Keeper of the Celestial Charts and Protector of the Aquamarine Diadem in the Order of the Curly Crusaders

    3a/b; low porosity; dense; medium thickness. Growing out a weird haircut.
    Cleanse: As I Am Curl Cowash; Giovanni Smooth as Silk Shampoo
    Condition:Tresemme Naturals
    LI:KCKT; CHS LI
    Stylers: AG Re:Coil; CJCCCCL; KCCC; AG Mousse Gel; HESMU;
    Denman Brush.

    Treatments:SheaMoisture Fruit Fusion; Aphogee PT
  • ILovejuiceboxesILovejuiceboxes Registered Users Posts: 50
    At my, people like it curly because me and two other people are the only ones with curls,and it's all SUPER curly. I straighten it a lot there because I only have ten minute in the morning and three hours every three/four days instead of two hours daily works out better. At my old school, I never straightened it because I didn't have a working flat iron. When I did, people complimented me left and right. At my oldold school, I always got teased for having curly hair and they all told me to flat iron it. At the school before that I was too young to care.
    I think that maybe it's the novelty of seeing someone with hair so completely different than usual, not your attractivness with curls.
    My hair is stubborn. What I thought would help me only resulted in horrible, damaged hair. Straightening my hair is now the only reasonable thing I can do. So, I am no longer CG. Not until my hair gets fixed.
    Goal- Long, shiny locks! Currently shoulder length when curly. Goal is to reach around right below chest area. Wish me luck! :)

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